19 episodes
A Time to Sharpen Axel Liimatta & Brandon Maxwell
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- Kids & Family
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5.0 • 6 Ratings
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A bi-weekly podcast that examines how working with teenagers can make us better versions of ourselves: better teachers, better counselors, better parents…better people.
Join two of Whetstone Boys Ranch's co-founders, Axel Liimatta and Brandon Maxwell, as they discuss what twenty years of serving struggling teenagers and their families has taught them about how to address the most challenging of behaviors. You'll find answers without dogma, encouragement without false hope, and sharpening without shame. Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/time-to-sharpen/support
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CelebraTion
Change usually happens slowly. Our minds and our bodies are not capable of handling too much all at once. It’s actually kind of unhealthy.
Yes, there are baptisms of fire, and God can pull off a ‘road to Damascus moment’ any time he desires, but these seem to be the exception.
At Whetstone, graduations are a time to publicly celebrate the change that has occurred within a young man over many months. They are also a reminder that whatever change occurs in his future will also take time. It will not all be smooth sailing from now on.
But when we live by faith, we inevitably look back and see that God was in charge all along.
On this episode of A Time to Sharpen, we’ll talk about this process and celebrate Christ’s work in shaping our boys’ hearts.
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MenToring
We cannot underestimate the power of mentors in our lives. None of us has the power of will to make it on our own.
We are not strong enough, smart enough, or good-looking enough. When we are teenagers, we THINK we are, but within a few short years (years that don’t feel short at the time) most of us realize our own folly.
As John Wayne is credited as saying, “Life is hard. It’s harder if you’re stupid.”
At their most basic level, mentors help us to not be stupid. This might seem like a very low standard, but I think most parents will settle for this 9 times out of 10. Those loftier virtues are great, and we should aim our life in their direction, but let’s first put some measures in place to keep us from moving in the opposite direction.
Mentors are this backstop. They are there to tell us, “Hey, stupid. Stop doing that stupid thing.” And if the relationship is there, we are inclined to listen.
Today on A Time to Sharpen, we’ll talk with Troy Vetter, executive pastor at Pomona Christian Church here in Missouri. Troy moved to the Show Me State to work at Whetstone in 2013. He was one of our very first “mentoring specialists.” He lived, ate, and breathed with the boys every day for almost 2 years. This is his story.
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Making SMARTr Goals
A mental note is a lost note. A short pencil is better than a long memory. If you aim at nothing, you’ll hit it every time.
That last quote is from Zig Ziglar. The first two my dad told me growing up…like…every day. They were drilled into my soul. “You have to write things down,” he’d say, “or it’s never gonna happen.” This is backed up by countless studies. I don’t know if successful people tend to write things down, or if writing things down makes you successful, but it doesn’t really matter which is the chicken and which is the egg – they both taste pretty good when they’re cooked and seasoned just right.
On this episode of A Time to Sharpen, we will discuss making SMARTr goals: goals that are Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, Time-Bound…and “relationship-oriented.” We added that last letter to the famous acronym, SMART, because none of it matters to parents, teachers, and counselors, if we don’t have relationship, does it?
Plus, spelling it that way kind of reminded me of Dumb and Dumber. And I really like Dumb and Dumber.
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Is iT time?
Timing is everything. This is true in so many areas of life. It’s true with hitting a curveball. It’s true about making a joke and about offering words of wisdom. It’s true about investing in crypto…boy, is it true about investing in crypto!
It’s also true when considering the right time to send a son or daughter to a therapeutic boarding school. Wait too long, and you’ll lose the window that you have to make an impact. Send them too soon, and you risk communicating that you don’t care enough to keep trying. Both extremes are dangerous, and it’s not like it’s better to err on one side than the other. You want the timing to be just right.
On this episode of A Time to Sharpen, Brandon and I will try to help parents answer the impossibly difficult question about when it’s “time” to send a child away from their home to get the help they need. It’s a question sent to us by one of our listeners, so we know it’s a good one.
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The sTruggle is reaL
The story of Gideon has some serious ups and downs. He trusts God and then he doesn’t. And then he does. And then God decides that Gideon doesn’t trust Him enough. So God reduces the size of Gideon’s army from 32,000 to 300, “lest Israel” according to the Biblical account, “claim glory for itself…saying, ‘My own hand has saved me.’”
It seems that God orchestrates our circumstances at times, so that He will be glorified, not us. He makes it impossible for us to conclude that the goodness in our life results from anything other than his love and grace.
The odd thing is that this often appears to us like He is apathetic, negligent, or even cruel. And even though we know this is not the case, we can’t help feeling this way.
On this episode of A Time to Sharpen, we are going to discuss some of these feelings. It’s a rollercoaster. And if that makes you feel uncomfortable, make you sure to buckle up before pressing play.
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born To run
We are born to run. The human body is built for it – it’s a biomechanical miracle, allowing all of our muscles, bones, and joints to move in synchronization. Little children can do it all day long without being trained how or told why.
As we get older, we become more interested in speed and utility. We see it as a means to end. We compare ourselves to others. Our bodies break down. Eventually, for most, it starts to cause pain. The pure joy of running gets pushed farther and farther from our mind.
The Bible says that “they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary.” It speaks of running as worship and celebration. When we run, we are doing what we were designed to do.
But the devil is good at what he does. He knows how to take something that God created and twist it just enough, lie about it just enough, that we no longer see his design clearly.
Join us this week on A Time to Sharpen, for a discussion of how to reclaim the joy of running. And we’re not just talking about the physical kind.
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Customer Reviews
Never too late...
Being a parent for 31 years, I can honestly say it is never too late to listen and learn from others about how we interact and treat others, whether it be our children or the people in our lives at school or the workplace or in social circles. I have listened to all of A Time to Sharpen episodes and always have something to think about and apply to my life. Thank you, Axel and Brandon and all of Whetstone for allowing us to hear the struggles and triumphs you have had as you sharpen and plant seeds in the lives of the young men at Whetstone Boys Ranch. You do great work with humble hearts.
Wondering tool.
This podcast is wonderful! These two guys seem to have an full belt of tools to help with young teens. I have enjoyed every episode. The way they bring subjects to the table and have a real conversation is great. Their sense of humor keeps it light yet they go deep.