Do you have strong opinions on how you would fix classic rock ‘n’ roll radio? Can you immediately describe, in detail, the worst record buying experience you have ever suffered? Do you and friends debate the pros and cons of collecting bootleg LPs? Do you meticulously curate your own Halloween playlist every year? Can you instantly name the first person you would remove from the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and the artist you would replace them with? If we gave you a $100.00 budget, could you immediately say what LP you would buy? Which pressing? Which color of vinyl? Of course you can’t/don’t. Normal people don’t bother with this level of minutiae. Chris and Matt, your hosts of the Audio Arcana Podcast, are not normal people. They spend a good deal of time discussing all those topics and a great deal more. Come join them every two weeks to find out what nonsense they are discussing, mocking, and obsessing over concerning music, artists, and collecting.
The Evil Powers of Rock 'n' Roll
"And ohhh, my soul, they got a hold on me, the evil powers of rock 'n' roll!" -The Evil Powers of Rock 'n' Roll by The Supersuckers
Chris almost put the lyrics from Metallica's Sad but True as the introduction to this episode, but then he remembered how many times he referenced "the evil powers of Rock 'n' Roll" during the recording. If Chris is going to rip off people cooler than him, he's going whole hog in ripping off people cooler than him, and the Supersuckers are much cooler than Chris. The Supersuckers are much cooler than most people.
From Link Wray's Rumble to Led Zeppelin's Stairway to Heaven to Iron Maiden's The Number of the Beast to NWA's Straight Outta Compton, there has been a long history of society being terrified of certain forms of music, and during the 1980s, things got really weird. This had a very distinct effect on Chris and Matt during their formative years.
40 years later (Christ, we're old...), they're going to address this age-old question, "Does aggressive music create aggressive people?" Come listen to Chris and Matt discuss examples of 1980s media and their sensationalized reporting, the PMRC (Really, PMRC? Sheena Easton was that terrifying to you?), and at no additional charge to you, the listener, they'll reference multiple scientific studies that have directly addressed this issue over the years. Just like they always do, they'll wrap everything up with their half-baked opinions on the topic.
Thank you so much for listening, and Chris and Matt hope you enjoy this episode!
Gonna Have A Breakdown
"Shakin', sweatin', feelin' bad (Anxiety), I feel like I'm going mad (Anxiety)" Breakdown by The Recoils
These lyrics? They just work out perfectly for this episode. Read on and find out why...
First, Chris made an anxiety inducing choice for this episode's first topic. It's bad, so bad. Chris decided that himself and Matt would check in on what's new, exciting, and popular in the Metal Community. And what's the worst way they could go about checking in with what's new, exciting, and popular in the Metal Community? They went to Spotify's Top Metal category and listened to the Top 5 metal songs. Now, it's not all bad, but when it's bad, it's so bad. Come listen to Chris' and Matt's very vocal opinions about the Top 5 metal songs. (Side note: Meryl Streep is the actress Chris couldn't remember. Meryl Streep is amazing.)
Second, just when you think Chris couldn't possibly be any dumber, he goes and purchases the new Recoils single, and TOTALLY REDEEMS HIMSELF! This single, Breakdown b/w Grifter just destroys, and Chris and Matt are going to talk at length what their honest thoughts were upon hearing it. You people were warned...
Thank you so much for listening, and Chris apologizes in advance if you click on certain links below. (LISTEN TO THE RECOILS). We hope you enjoy the episode, and we'll have something else to rant on about in another two weeks.
The Recoils Bandcamp: https://therecoilsfuck.bandcamp.com/album/breakdown
The Recoils Breakdown: https://youtu.be/FvAKfhTdvxc
In Flames State of Slow Decay: https://youtu.be/goddrM-QozI
Parkway Drive Glitch: https://youtu.be/bG9Cnh_Orkc
Lamb of God Nevermore: https://youtu.be/SnEXcv0YJQA
The Devil Wears Prada Salt: https://youtu.be/9ldQAuWzIxY
Stratovarius Survive: https://youtu.be/deL5dM9csNc
How To Behave And Why
"Under the world I wait for my fate. My soul is wasting beneath my blissful haze. My time of aging, wonder when I'll die. But when my time will come, I will know the reason why." Bury Me In Smoke by Down
I think Phil Anselmo might need to put down the bong, get out of the house, and go pet a kitten or something, but hey, at least he gives us some great damn songs.
Ever the giving souls that they are, your ne'er do well Audio Arcana hosts cram two episodes worth of podcasting into a single episode, just for you. In this episode you'll not only get to hear all about their adventures going to see Down play live at the Buckhead Theater on 05-20-22, they will flawlessly segue into how you should behave at concerts and why. Well, Matt manages to pull off a flawless segue. Chris, who ruins everything, had to do his separately at the end of the episode because he didn't plan ahead, and then he proceeds to go on a rant.
Thank you so much for listening, and we hope you enjoy the episode.
Stevie Tombstone BandCamp Page: https://stevietombstone.bandcamp.com/
The Recoils BandCamp Page: The Recoils (bandcamp.com)
Ghost and Mastodon Tour 2022: https://ghost-official.com/#tour
North American Siege 2022
"Blow your trumpets, Gabriel! As I beheld the bewilderment ov Eden. Break the bread...and crumb by crumb into the Leviathan's den...Nations fall prey. Hail my return." Blow Your Trumpets Gabriel by Behemoth
Well, Chris and Matt didn't hear any trumpets. They didn't see Eden. There might have been bread, but they weren't particularly looking for it. It would've been nice to see Leviathan, but they didn't see anything of the sort. How-frickin-ever, they DID see the return of Behemoth to Atlanta!
Come join your ne'er do well Audio Arcana hosts as they recount their evening witnessing the North American Siege tour of 2022 in Atlanta, GA. You'll hear all about traffic on I-20, immovable objects, which patches are most evil, back problems, drunks, elevators, and poor choices that wind up at Waffle House. Oh, they will also talk at length about the concert itself. So, if you didn't have the good fortune to see the North American Siege Tour in a city near you, this is almost as good as being there. Kind of. Not really, but Chris and Matt certainly try.
Thank you so much for your patience in waiting for this episode. I promise we're still here. Thank you so much for listening, and we hope you enjoy the episode!
Behemoth Ov My Herculean Exile (Live At The Eastern, Atlanta GA 04-22-22): https://youtu.be/51oXRDdEcto
Tie Your Mother Down
"Your Mommy's all right. Your Daddy's all right. They just seem a little weird. Surrender, surrender, but don't give yourself away." Surrender by Cheap Trick
Dude. Cheap Trick is amazing, and this lyric is perfect for episode 41. Chris' and Matt's parents were/are wonderful people, but man...they certainly had some missteps in raising your ne'er do well hosts of the Audio Arcana podcast. Chris and Matt have some serious questions about their childhoods:
Why did our parents love the Oldsmobile Cutlass? Which one was Dawn? Why were there so many songs about love? How did they fit 48 songs on a single LP? Or two 8 track cassettes? Why did bands have 4 lead singers? Why did so many musical artists have television variety shows? What is the power of Saratoga? What was he the captain of? Why did our parents love to wake us up on Saturday morning at 0700 to do clean the pool and do yard work? Most importantly, why did so much of their music suck?!?
Thank you so much for listening. Chris and Matt hope you enjoy this episode, and they'll be back in two weeks with something else dumb to talk about.
Lightning Strikes Only Once
"Eh-eh-eh, eh-eh-eh, eh, sexy lady! Op, op, op, op, Oppa Gangnam Style!" Gangam Style by Psy
You. Are. Welcome.
Come join Chris and Matt this episode as they delve into what to actually call the 2000s, AC/DC if they had a female lead singer, road rage, a D chord, the 1982 World's Fair, roller skating, high school classmates, King Diamond, possums and their kingdoms, la-la-la-la-la-la bamba, attics in the County Wicklow, and how all of these things lead to Chris' and Matt's favorite One-Hit Wonders through the decades.
Just a heads-up, Chris alienates everyone, especially Matt, and then proceeds to get up on his soap box at the end. Chris does these things on occasion.
Thank you so much for listening. Chris and Matt hope you enjoy the episode, and they'll be back in two weeks with something else dumb to talk about.
White Zombie La Sexercisto: Devil Music Vol. 1 30th Anniversary Roundtable: https://youtu.be/0NSlMG6B0pI
Record Store Day 2022 List: https://recordstoreday.com/SpecialReleases
Arrived party with Ginger Spice. Departed with Amanda (or Amana).
There is no escaping the ‘Africa’ ear worm.
Obvious culmination of a life’s work
Even if you don’t share their tastes, the hosts’ love of their topics is infectious and their child-like glee fully comes through. I laugh out loud at least once an episode at some foolishness or another. A high point in my feed every two weeks.