Conflict Coach with Dr. Emily Taylor

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Tired of feeling overwhelmed by conflict in your life? Learn the skills to confidently handle any conflict, as certified mediator Dr. Emily Taylor coaches real people through real conflicts in their lives. From family struggles to workplace disputes, neighborhood conflicts to in-law disagreements, each episode of Conflict Coach with Dr. Emily Taylor gives you concrete strategies to find the root of a conflict, identify solutions and create positive change. Dr. Emily Taylor’s passion for helping others gain the confidence to navigate conflict comes from her personal experience (she’s a married mom of five!) and her professional life (PhD in psychology, certified conflict mediator, author of the books “Conflict Fluent” and “Raising Mediators.”) Conflicts are inevitable, but they don’t have to ruin your life. Let Dr. Emily Taylor be your guide to building the life you want. Conflict Coach with Dr. Emily Taylor is a BYUradio podcast. New episodes every other Tuesday starting February 4. Connect with Dr. Emily on social media @conflictcoachwithdremily.

  1. 1H AGO

    When Should You Let Go of a One-Sided Friendship?

    Dr. Emily Taylor coaches Sarah, who is feeling increasingly frustrated with the inconsistency of her long-time friend Julie. We all have cherished friendships that we’d like to last forever, but knowing when it’s time to let one go is an important part of maintaining healthy boundaries. In this episode, Dr. Emily helps Sarah understand the signs of growing out of a friendship and the opportunity to establish several layers of friendships that can receive different levels of her time and attention. Together, they develop a strategy to realign Sarah’s friendship with Julie to better match her current stage of life. In this episode you’ll learn how to: - Recognize when a friendship has become one-sided - Triage your friendships to different levels of intimacy - Appropriately respond when a boundary is crossed Let us know how these strategies work in your own life! Email Dr. Emily at conflictcoach@byu.edu or connect with her on social media: @conflictcoachwithdremily CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction to Conflict Coach 00:53 Meet Sarah: Frustration with a Close Friend 06:44 Signs You’re Growing Out of a Friendship 14:53 Triaging Friendships 16:28 Sarah’s Plan for Setting Boundaries 24:19 Conclusion and Key Takeaways

    28 min
  2. Are You The Source of Tension in Your Conflicts?

    OCT 28

    Are You The Source of Tension in Your Conflicts?

    Dr. Emily Taylor coaches Laura, who is having conflict with a new coworker and wonders if she’s the cause of the tension. If you're someone who likes to be liked - and most of us are! - it's easy to slip into blaming yourself for conflicts in your life. In this coaching session, Dr. Emily helps Laura to unpack why she sees herself as the cause of the tension and how that limits the options Laura has for resolving the conflict with her coworker. Together they explore Laura’s needs in the conflict and role-play to uncover what the coworker’s needs might be. Then they brainstorm ways Laura could engage with her coworker to resolve their friction. In this episode you’ll learn how to: - Name your needs in a conflict - Uncover your conflict partner’s needs through role-play - Effectively brainstorm your options - Resolve conflict through negotiation, rather than competition Dr. Emily recommends this resource from the Nonviolent Communication (NVC) Academy to help you name your needs and feelings: https://nvcacademy.com/media/NVCA/learning-tools/NVCA-feelings-needs.pdf Let us know how these strategies work in your own life! Email Dr. Emily at conflictcoach@byu.edu or connect with her on social media: @conflictcoachwithdremily CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction to Conflict Coach 00:53 Meet Laura and Her Workplace Conflict 03:17 Understanding the Root of the Conflict 08:16 Role-Playing to Gain Perspective 16:50 Brainstorming Solutions 25:33 Key Takeaways and Conclusion

    29 min
  3. How Do You Ask for Help Without Feeling Like a Burden?

    OCT 14

    How Do You Ask for Help Without Feeling Like a Burden?

    Dr. Emily Taylor coaches Kristy, who is struggling to advocate for herself at work and now faces discipline that could result in her firing. The longer you wait to acknowledge your own needs in a conflict, the harder it becomes. Kristy has spent more than a decade keeping her vision loss a secret at work, even though she has a legal right to receive assistance. Now that her eyesight is affecting her ability to do her job, Kristy feels like her needs are a burden to others, but also that she’s being treated unfairly by her boss. Dr. Emily helps Kristy brainstorm ways to resolve the conflict while confidently addressing her own needs. In this episode you’ll learn how to: - Avoid premature problem-solving - Feel confident identifying and expressing your needs - Find a mentor to guide you in the conflict Let us know how these strategies work in your own life! Email Dr. Emily at conflictcoach@byu.edu or connect with her on social media: @conflictcoachwithdremily CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction to The Conflict Coach 01:11 Trouble at Work 02:49 Worsening Eyesight and Accommodations 06:26 Avoiding Premature Problem-Solving 08:30 Identifying Needs 12:08 Honoring Needs 15:15 Brainstorming Options 21:55 Conclusion and Takeaways

    24 min
  4. How Do You Navigate Difficult Relationships When You’re Grieving?

    SEP 30

    How Do You Navigate Difficult Relationships When You’re Grieving?

    Dr. Emily Taylor coaches Stacie, who recently lost her sister to suicide and is in conflict with her late sister’s husband. Grief can heighten the tension in relationships and sometimes makes it difficult to identify what our own needs are in conflict. Dr. Emily helps Stacie sift through her hurt and anger to pinpoint her core need in the conflict. In the process, Stacie discovers new options to pursue in her relationship with her sister’s family and ends the session feeling hopeful. In this episode you’ll learn how to: - Identify your “why” in a conflict. - Use the 4 steps of nonviolent communication. - Discover paths forward through role-playing. Let us know how these strategies work in your own life! Email Dr. Emily at conflictcoach@byu.edu or connect with her on social media: @conflictcoachwithdremily If you or someone you know is in crisis, the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline is available 24/7 for free, confidential support. Call or text 988. CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction to The Conflict Coach 01:28 Sister’s Suicide 02:20 Prior Conflict with Sister’s Family 05:46 Getting to the Core Need 12:32 Roleplaying Nonviolent Communication 19:05 Roleplay Recap 22:04 Conclusion and Takeaway

    25 min

  5. JUN 24 · BONUS

    Season Finale - Let’s Get Updates on Jeff, Morgan, Tyler, Erika and Sara!

    Dr. Emily Taylor shares updates on several people she coached in Season One of the show. Has Jeff (Episode 9) found better work-life balance? Did Morgan (Episode 8) reconcile with her estranged sister? What happened with Sara’s coworker conflict in Episode 10? How did Erika (Episode 1) end up resolving things with her husband? Did Tyler (Episode 5) find a way to connect with his sister so they could share household duties more equally? In this final episode of the season, Dr. Emily also goes behind the scenes of conflict coaching with her producer Julie Rose to answer questions like: -Why doesn’t she tell people how to solve their conflicts? -What does she really mean when she asks “What is your need?” -How could texting sometimes be better than face-to-face communication in a conflict? -Why is role-playing such a common part of a coaching session? CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction and Season Recap 00:51 Update on Jeff’s Journey 01:36 Morgan's Update with Her Estranged Sister 04:03 Coaching Insights: The Role of a Coach 06:11 Tyler's Update: Building Sibling Relationships 10:32 Erika's Update: Understanding Underlying Needs 16:55 The Power of Mirroring in Conflict Resolution 19:32 Dr. Emily’s Conflict Achilles Heel 21:08 Role Playing and Sara’s Update 27:08 Reflections and Looking Ahead

    28 min
  6. What Do You Do When Someone Crosses a Boundary?

    JUN 10

    What Do You Do When Someone Crosses a Boundary?

    Dr. Emily Taylor coaches Tina whose 11-year-old son is being harassed by another boy at school. Tina admits she usually tries to avoid confronting issues directly, but felt an important boundary was crossed and she needed to make sure the school was addressing the problem. Now Tina’s worried how the fallout from the conflict will affect her son at school and her own social interactions with the other boy’s parents. Dr. Taylor offers guidance on enforcing healthy boundaries and helps Tina role-play to prepare for an awkward social interaction. In this episode you’ll learn how to: -Establish and maintain healthy boundaries. -Process your emotions by role-playing before a tense encounter. -Prioritize the relationships that are most important to you in a conflict. Let us know how these strategies work in your own life! Email Dr. Emily at conflictcoach@byu.edu or connect with her on social media: @conflictcoachwithdremily CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction to the Conflict Coach 00:48 Meet Tina and Her Conflict 06:33 Understanding Boundaries in Conflict 11:57 Role-Playing the Confrontation 17:46 Reflecting on the Parent-Child Relationship 21:35 Conclusion and Key Takeaways

    25 min
  7. How Can You Tell If Your Expectations in a Conflict Are Realistic?

    MAY 27

    How Can You Tell If Your Expectations in a Conflict Are Realistic?

    Dr. Emily Taylor coaches Claire, who is in a stalemate with her young adult daughter, who still lives at home and is not progressing toward independence. The daughter is 23 and has Autism Spectrum Disorder and ADHD. Claire tries to be compassionate, but suspects her daughter is capable of more.  A lot of conflicts involve uncertainty around what to realistically demand of the other person - maybe it's an elderly parent who's been diagnosed with Alzheimer's or a child custody battle with a former spouse or an adult child leaving the family's shared faith. Dr. Emily helps Claire identify ways to get her questions answered so she can start working toward a resolution. In this episode you’ll learn how to: - Create a map of your conflict to better identify possible resolutions. - Identify an unanswered question at the root of your conflict. - Know when to seek expert advice on your specific conflict. Let us know how these strategies work in your own life! Email Dr. Emily at conflictcoach@byu.edu or connect with her on social media: @conflictcoachwithdremily CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:48 Stalemate Between Claire and Her Daughter 01:13 Daughter’s Background and Challenges: ASD, ADHD, ODD 03:56 Exploring Claire's Frustrations 07:31 Mapping the Conflict 09:47 Imagining a Positive Scenario 14:52 Seeking Resources and Support 21:33 Conclusion and Takeaways

    24 min
  8. When Someone’s Treating You Poorly, What Are Your Options?

    MAY 13

    When Someone’s Treating You Poorly, What Are Your Options?

    Dr. Emily Taylor coaches Sara - a young professional in her 30s - who is being treated unkindly by a coworker. Peer relationships often experience the most conflict because there are so many opportunities for friction. Sara’s coworker is also a friend who helped her get the job and now seems to be looking for any reason to disagree and dismiss Sara’s opinions. Dr. Emily coaches Sara through a role-playing exercise to help her gain insight into her coworker’s motivations. Together they explore ways that Sara might build warmth and camaraderie in the relationship, even if her coworker is unwilling to directly address the conflict. In this episode you’ll learn how to: -Identify the“fundamental attribution error” in your judgment of the other person’s behavior.  -Use the TRIP acronym to identify what your conflict is really about. -Recognize when direct confrontation is not the best approach in conflict. Let us know how these strategies work in your own life! Email Dr. Emily at conflictcoach@byu.edu or connect with her on social media: @conflictcoachwithdremily CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:48 Meet Sara and Her Conflict 03:38 Why the Conflict is Hurtful to Sara 09:52 Role-Playing to Understand Her Coworker’s Perspective 13:52 Beware of the “Fundamental Attribution Error” 18:00 The TRIP Acronym 24:17 Sara Has a Surprising Realization 25:12 Key Takeaways and Conclusion

    28 min
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Tired of feeling overwhelmed by conflict in your life? Learn the skills to confidently handle any conflict, as certified mediator Dr. Emily Taylor coaches real people through real conflicts in their lives. From family struggles to workplace disputes, neighborhood conflicts to in-law disagreements, each episode of Conflict Coach with Dr. Emily Taylor gives you concrete strategies to find the root of a conflict, identify solutions and create positive change. Dr. Emily Taylor’s passion for helping others gain the confidence to navigate conflict comes from her personal experience (she’s a married mom of five!) and her professional life (PhD in psychology, certified conflict mediator, author of the books “Conflict Fluent” and “Raising Mediators.”) Conflicts are inevitable, but they don’t have to ruin your life. Let Dr. Emily Taylor be your guide to building the life you want. Conflict Coach with Dr. Emily Taylor is a BYUradio podcast. New episodes every other Tuesday starting February 4. Connect with Dr. Emily on social media @conflictcoachwithdremily.

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