Radically empathic advice. Produced by WBUR.
Encore: Rapid Fire: Make the Call
In this encore "rapid fire" episode, the Sugars give brief answers to a handful of letters. This time, they challenge each other to make the call -- one way or the other -- on the questions they're discussing, rather than offer open-ended guidance.
Encore: A Spy In The House Of Love — With Ariel Levy
Snooping on your spouse is generally ill-advised, but what if he or she has an addiction and is constantly lying about it? The Sugars and writer Ariel Levy answer this question in this episode, originally released on December 2, 2017.
Encore: There's Just One Thing
In this "rapid fire" episode, the Sugars read letters from four women who each have one not-so-tiny reservation about the men they’re dating. A Black woman is dating a white man who is unwilling to talk about race issues, claiming that she’s “too sensitive.” Another woman’s boyfriend, a Christian, is having second thoughts about dating her because she’s an atheist. The Sugars tackle these issues and more, and weigh in on which can be ironed out and which should be deal breakers.
Encore: Sexless Relationships, Part 2
The Sugars are joined by the therapist Esther Perel to discuss a letter from a husband who is in a sexless marriage and is looking for a way to help his wife heal from trauma.
Dear Sugars Presents: Woman Yelling at a Cat
This week, we're sharing an episode of another WBUR podcast, Endless Thread.The show is in the middle of a series all about internet memes, and they recently featured the woman at the center of the popular "Woman Yelling at a Cat" meme, Taylor Armstrong from the original cast of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. The story behind the image featured in this meme is surprising and painful, so please take care when listening.
Encore: A Night of Bad Stories
Dear Sugars returns to Portland, Oregon, for another raucous and uplifting live show. The Sugars get a surprising update from a letter writer from their past; discuss a new letter with a special guest, Omar El Akkad; and ask the audience, “What’s the ‘bad story’ you tell yourself?” “Bad Stories,” the title of Steve Almond’s new book, are the false narratives we tell ourselves that undermine our happiness. “You’ve got to revise those narratives,” encourages Cheryl Strayed. “You have the capacity for change and transformation.” This episode was originally published on April 12th, 2018.
Really like it so far!
I do wish they were more aware of their use of binary language (which excludes non-binary trans people— I’ve heard “men and women” instead of simply “people”, “his or her” instead of “their”. Not everyone uses “he” or “she”. Some of use use they/them singular pronouns) and more aware of how they’re describing trans people (in the episode about the two trans guys). The trans woman spoken about in the beginning wasn’t “a woman who used to be a man”. Trans people have always been the gender we say we are— what you meant to say was, she was a trans woman. A lot of us don’t have the language to explain how we see ourselves, until later on in life (our twenties or later). If you’re talking about us before we came out as trans, you would say “She’s a trans woman” or “She was assigned male at birth”. We commonly use AFAB & AMAB for short, instead of “assigned female/male at birth”. We’re all assigned a binary s*x at birth and the problem lies with the fact that society still conflates s*x with gender. Gender isn’t determined by anatomy, and both s*x and gender are spectrums! Most things in life are, including orientation. Just thought this might be helpful for the future! I mean all the best— I try to educate whenever I possibly can. I’m a non-binary trans & trans masculine person, who uses mainly they/them/their pronouns. For anyone who wants to learn more about trans identities, there’s a huge amount of information available online! It sounds obvious, but Google whatever you want to know and you’ll find answers. Keep in mind that every trans person is unique. Some of us socially transition, but not medically. Some of us can’t medically transition due to financial restrictions or health issues. That’s just a starting point: gender is a spectrum, not determined by the body you were born in to, and for some people, their sense of gender changes. “Non-binary trans” is a term that encompasses a lot of trans identities: gender fluid, genderqueer, trans masculine, trans feminine, agender, and so many more. Binary trans refers to binary trans women and binary trans men. Lastly, gender oppression isn’t only experienced by cisgender women. It’s also experienced by trans people of all genders. We’re discriminated against for being trans, have a huge lack of representation in media and in subjects like s*x ed & history (in schools), have a long way to go in order to have equal rights under the law, and for AFAB trans people, many of us still have to worry about a lack of access to birth control, abortions, period products, etc. Some of us want to get pregnant and give birth to our kids, too. The average cis person doesn’t know about most of this, but I wish it were common knowledge! I hope that information helps in some way, if this podcast addresses issues that affect trans people again
Love the hosts!
I’ve been obsessed with Cheryl Strayed so I knew she’d be fabulous but now I’m also a new Steve Almond fan and will start reading his work. Love the care, generosity and thoughtful feedback you provide your audience even when you disagree. Thank you for lending the world your tender and wild artist-hearted advice!
Honestly, this podcast shouldn’t be posting new episodes. Literally only repeats over and over again. I used to love this, but I am tired of the repeats.