Deeply Unimportant: Boring Technical Readings for Sleep

Dallas Kachan, former news anchor & sleep narrator
  • 5.0 (2)
  • ALTERNATIVE HEALTH
  • UPDATED WEEKLY

If everyday bed time stories keep you awake, switch to the deep, resonant boredom of Deeply Unimportant. Your host, a former news anchor, reads boring manuals and codes as adult bed time stories that actually help you sleep. Unlike short bed time stories with engaging plots, this is pure mental white noise, with the calm of a sleep meditation podcast. Perfect for soothing adult ADHD, these are sleep stories consisting of reassuring, nondescript data. Experience the comforting cadence of the Deeply Unimportant.

Episodes

  1. 2D AGO

    Sleep Meditation: UIC 860: The Chemical Composition of Steel Rails (Boring Voice)

    Fall asleep to one of the deepest, most soothing voices you've ever heard reading the most inconsequential material there is. Tonight, we do not travel by train. We inspect the metallurgy of the rails. Fall asleep to UIC Code 860, the definitive European specification for the supply of rails, and review the required chemical composition of the steel, the Brinell hardness testing procedures, and the specific branding marks required on the web of the rail. Find comfort in the unyielding quality of the track. This technical reading is designed to replace conventional bed time stories with structured boredom. An alternative to standard short bed time stories, this episode offers the focus of a sleep meditation podcast that can also soothe adult ADHD. Deeply Unimportant's adult bed time stories consist of pure, unchallenging data—sleep stories meant to be ignored. Subscribe for ad-free episodes, long, extended episodes, bonus content and more. And consider gifting a subscription. Visit deeplyunimportant.com.

    39 min

  2. JAN 11

    Sleep Story: ICAO Annex 5 Standard Atmosphere & Unit Conversion

    Fall asleep to one of the deepest, most soothing voices you've ever heard reading the most inconsequential material there is. Leave the chaos of real weather and enter a perfect, theoretical world. Drift off to International Civil Aviation Organization (ICAO) Annex 5, which dictates the global units of measurement for aviation, including the precise constants of the Standard Atmosphere, the definition of altitude, and the use of the SI system. Find comfort in the standardization of reality itself. This technical reading is designed to replace conventional bed time stories with structured boredom. An alternative to standard short bed time stories, this episode offers the focus of a sleep meditation podcast that can also soothe adult ADHD. Deeply Unimportant's adult bed time stories consist of pure, unchallenging data—sleep stories meant to be ignored. Subscribe for ad-free episodes, long, extended episodes, bonus content and more. And consider gifting a subscription. Visit deeplyunimportant.com.

    43 min

  3. JAN 1

    Sleep Aid: CSC 1972 International Convention for Safe Containers (Boring Voice)

    Fall asleep to one of the deepest, most soothing voices you've ever heard reading the most inconsequential material there is. Leave the chaos of the ocean for the quiet discipline of the shipyard to review the required stacking, racking, and restraint tests for the twenty-foot equivalent unit, as defined by the International Convention for Safe Containers. Achieve deep rest in the immutable strength of the standardized box as we contemplate the steel corrugated wall and the immutable structural laws that govern its construction. Find peace in the meticulous safety requirements for the corrosion-resistant Safety Approval Plate, from the precise sequence of indelible markings to the exact 50-millimeter height of the registration letters. We categorize the static vertical compression of the 1.8g stacking load, maintained for exactly five minutes, and review the longitudinal restraint tests that guarantee rigidity against the indifferent movements of the global transportation system. This technical reading is designed to replace conventional bed time stories with structured boredom. An alternative to standard short bed time stories, this episode offers the focus of a sleep meditation podcast that can also soothe adult ADHD. Deeply Unimportant's adult bed time stories consist of pure, unchallenging data—sleep stories meant to be ignored. Subscribe for ad-free episodes, long episodes that run all night, bonus content and more. And consider gifting a subscription. Visit deeplyunimportant.com.

    45 min

  4. 12/23/2025

    Sleep Aid: Santa's Redacted "Naughty" List (Alphabetical First Names)

    Fall asleep to one of the deepest, most soothing voices you've ever heard reading the most inconsequential material there is. Access the restricted behavioral archives of the far north and be lulled by the definitive, alphabetical registry of non-compliance. Experience Santa's legendary "Naughty List" treated with the clinical, administrative gravity of a national news broadcast. Achieve deep rest in the meticulous recitation of redacted first names—from Aaron to Zoe—where all narrative mischief and surnames have been strictly omitted for privacy. Find peace in the unwavering cadence of the 2025 Behavioral Matrix, where festive excitement is disregarded in favor of pure, rhythmic data. Former news anchor Dallas Kachan presents the Global Non-Compliance Ledger. If you struggle with insomnia or ADHD and find that traditional sleep stories are too engaging, this episode offers a "structured drift." By replacing narrative hooks with monotonous data, we provide a boring path for your mind to follow into sleep. This is the ultimate white noise alternative for a peaceful night. Subscribe for ad-free episodes, long episodes that run all night, bonus content and more. And consider gifting a subscription. Visit deeplyunimportant.com.

    1h 15m

  5. 12/17/2025

    Deep Voice Sleep: NASA-STD-3000 Human Standards

    Fall asleep to one of the deepest, most soothing voices you've ever heard reading the most inconsequential material there is. Fall asleep to the ultimate authority for human engineering in space: NASA-STD-3000, "Man-Systems Integration Standards." This episode focuses on Section 5: Human Performance Capabilities. Relax as we process the rigid requirements for astronaut functionality, including the calculation of Minimum Character Height (16 arc minutes!), the required chromaticity boundaries for color-coded displays, and the acoustic criteria for auditory alarms. Sleep secure in the knowledge that every action, from a simple control movement to a complex procedure, has been measured, contained, and deemed acceptable for the 5th percentile female. This technical reading is designed to replace conventional bed time stories with structured boredom. An alternative to standard short bed time stories, this episode offers the focus of a sleep meditation podcast that can also soothe adult ADHD. Deeply Unimportant's adult bed time stories consist of pure, unchallenging data—sleep stories meant to be ignored. Subscribe for ad-free episodes, long episodes that run all night, bonus content and more. And consider gifting a subscription. Visit deeplyunimportant.com.

    42 min

  6. 12/14/2025

    Sleep Meditation: 1954 Singer Sewing Machine Operating Manual

    Fall asleep to one of the deepest, most soothing voices you've ever heard reading the most inconsequential material there is. Drift off immersing yourself in the meticulous operational procedures for the iconic Singer Model 201 sewing machine. Find rest in the certainty of Section 2, which dictates the precise method for threading the upper body, the correct path for the 'Perfect Lockstitch,' and the non-negotiable technique for testing bobbin tension—the delicate two-inch drop-and-hold test. Surrender to the rhythm of perfect mechanism and the required periodicity of lubrication. This technical reading is designed to replace conventional bed time stories with structured boredom. An alternative to standard short bed time stories, this episode offers the focus of a sleep meditation podcast that can also soothe adult ADHD. Deeply Unimportant's adult bed time stories consist of pure, unchallenging data—sleep stories meant to be ignored. Subscribe for ad-free episodes, long episodes that run all night, bonus content and more. And consider gifting a subscription. Visit deeplyunimportant.com.

    56 min

  7. 12/12/2025

    Sleep Story: 1922 Western Softwood Lumber Grading Rules (Boring Voice)

    Fall asleep to one of the deepest, soothing voices you've ever heard reading the most inconsequential material there is. Travel to the U.S. Pacific Northwest of 1922 and be lulled by the definitive rules for classifying Ponderosa Pine and Sugar Pine. Achieve deep rest in the meticulous definition of the acceptable flaw. Find peace in the precise allowance for Grade C Select, which permits "small, seasonal checks" and "light blue stain." We categorize the exact dimensions of a "sound, tight knot" (not to exceed one inch) and review the limits for pitch pockets and wane. And don't miss a serene review of the rules of tally, where every board foot is measured, and all fractions of length are disregarded. Deeply Unimportant is the ultimate sleep aid for minds that won't quit. No whispers, guided meditations, or gentle fairy tales. This is ordered, structured, deep-voiced boredom. Your host, a former news anchor, delivers unchallenging, nondescript material—from municipal codes to technical specifications—in a protracted, professional style with classic broadcast gravitas. The deep, resonant, unwavering tone is the perfect mental white noise, anchoring racing thoughts with comforting cadence and structure. Subscribe for ad-free episodes, long episodes that run all night, bonus content and more. And consider gifting a subscription. Visit deeplyunimportant.com.

    46 min

  8. 12/12/2025

    Sleep Aid: Boring Technical Readings for Insomnia (Show Trailer)

    The definitive audio sedative for the racing mind. Deeply Unimportant is not another sleep story; it is a structural anchor for your thoughts. Join former news anchor Dallas Kachan as he uses his professional broadcast gravitas to read the world's most inconsequential technical data—from municipal codes to appliance manuals—designed specifically to be ignored. Are you tired of bedtime stories that keep you awake? Switch to the deep, resonant boredom of Deeply Unimportant. Replace typical adult bedtime stories with the soothing delivery of a former news anchor reading uninteresting technical data. No plots, no characters—just the reassuring sound of short bedtime stories made from archived inventory lists. It functions like a sleep meditation podcast but uses rigid structure to anchor the mind, making it ideal for adult ADHD. These are sleep stories designed to be ignored. Let the professional gravitas of the Deeply Unimportant lull you into a deep slumber.

    3 min

Trailer

Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
2 Ratings

About

If everyday bed time stories keep you awake, switch to the deep, resonant boredom of Deeply Unimportant. Your host, a former news anchor, reads boring manuals and codes as adult bed time stories that actually help you sleep. Unlike short bed time stories with engaging plots, this is pure mental white noise, with the calm of a sleep meditation podcast. Perfect for soothing adult ADHD, these are sleep stories consisting of reassuring, nondescript data. Experience the comforting cadence of the Deeply Unimportant.

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