100 episodes

A secular humanist podcast about Secular Grace after deconstruction and deconversion.

The podcast takes an honest look at stories of faith transition from a life-altering faith, to doubt and deconstruction, to deconversion, and finally, to a thriving graceful life post-deconversion.

My name is David, and I am trying to be the Graceful Atheist. Join me and be graceful human beings.

https://gracefulatheist.com/?gaid=gapdsc Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support

Graceful Atheist Podcast Graceful Atheist

    • Religion & Spirituality
    • 4.8 • 85 Ratings

A secular humanist podcast about Secular Grace after deconstruction and deconversion.

The podcast takes an honest look at stories of faith transition from a life-altering faith, to doubt and deconstruction, to deconversion, and finally, to a thriving graceful life post-deconversion.

My name is David, and I am trying to be the Graceful Atheist. Join me and be graceful human beings.

https://gracefulatheist.com/?gaid=gapdsc Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support

    Jose Ramos: Deconverted In The Pulpit

    Jose Ramos: Deconverted In The Pulpit

    This week’s guest is Jose Ramos, Hannah’s husband from her episode two weeks ago.

    Jose’s family converted to Independent Fundamentalist Baptist and his father became a pastor. They were taught that the IFB had the “pure word of God,” and it was their purpose to evangelize and change the world.

    Throughout his teens, Jose’s only rebellion was, “like a month partying with [his] brothers.” Later, he went to Bible College, and then started preaching. He met Hannah and took over his father’s Spanish speaking church. Studying the Bible for ministry, however, brought more questions and doubts.

    Over the next year, he continued preaching but knew he didn’t believe. He left the ministry and later told Hannah why. After another hard and depressive year, he knew he was agnostic.

    Jose gave Hannah the space to go on her own journey. They still attended church as a family, but he did not try to change her. Today, their stories can give comfort to other couples facing religious doubts and uncertainties.

    Jose’s honesty and vulnerability show the grace and goodness in his own human heart. No more looking forward to heaven or fearing hell, simply being present in each movement and looking for the beauty that’s found there.

    Recommendations
    Books

    #PaidLinks

    Sapiens by Yuval Noah Harari
    https://amzn.to/3xuaddv

    (Also available in graphic novel form)
    https://amzn.to/319PbEF
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    Homo Deus by Yuval Noah Harari
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    Podcasts

    Sam Harris’ Making Sense
    https://www.samharris.org/

    Links
    Hannah’s episode
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/11/14/hannah-ramos-unequally-yoked-to-deconverted/

    Clergy Project
    https://clergyproject.org/

    Interact
    Deconversion
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/

    Secular Grace
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/

    Attribution
    "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
    https://makaihbeats.net/


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    • 1 hr 23 min
    Movie Review: The Truman Show

    Movie Review: The Truman Show

    “Good afternoon. Good evening. And good night.”
    This week’s episode is a compelling discussion between David and past podcast guests Jimmy and Colin. They take a deep dive into how The Truman Show mirrors the long, painful journey of deconstruction—realizing the story you’ve been told isn’t quite what it seems, pushing back little by little, and then sometimes leaving completely, walking out the door and into the darkness.

    “You never had a camera in my head.”
    They consider it all:


    The trauma and fears induced
    Infantilization
    The constant gaslighting
    The creation and controlling of relationships
    And the lies, a completely fabricated life.

    All done to “love him, protect him.”

    They each bring their own stories to the table, stories of courage and uncertainty and a desire for truth, stories that resonate with many people. Like Truman, we can lean in when what we’ve believed no longer lines up with what we’re experiencing. We can be curious, ask questions and see where that journey takes us.

    Links
    Where to stream The Truman Show
    https://www.justwatch.com/us/movie/the-truman-show

    Final scene
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gn5kuDdeGzs

    Interact
    Full show notes
    movie-review-the-truman-show/?gaid=gap98">https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/11/21/movie-review-the-truman-show/

    Deconversion
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/

    Secular Grace
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/

    Attribution
    "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
    https://makaihbeats.net/


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    • 1 hr 6 min
    Hannah Ramos: Unequally Yoked To Deconverted

    Hannah Ramos: Unequally Yoked To Deconverted

    My guest this week is Hannah Ramos. Hannah grew up in an Independent Fundamentalist Baptist family, one of ten homeschooled children. Dissuaded from going to bible college, she waited for her Prince Charming. When Jose showed up to speak at her church, she knew he was “God’s choice” for her as a husband.

    Very early in their marriage, Jose took over as pastor of a Spanish speaking church. Everything seemed to be going according to God’s plan, until three years later when Jose admitted to Hannah that he no longer believed. Suddenly, she found herself in an unequally yoked relationship.

    For six years, Hannah focused on her own faith and raising their three children as believers, and they loved one other through this time. Jose supported Hannah’s faith, and Hannah had given up on changing Jose’s mind. Hannah had the space to begin to question her own faith.

    Her children innocently asked her to explain the Trinity, and they were not satisfied with her answers. She read through the Bible, asking, “But is this true?” She no longer could assume that it was. Finally the pat answers Hannah received no longer satisfied her, and she admitted to herself that she also no longer believed.

    To Jose’s amazement (and slight disbelief), Hannah revealed that she was no longer a Christian. Today, they are closer than ever, and their children are free to decide for themselves what they believe. Hannah has found a peace she did not think was possible.

    Interact
    Full show notes
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/11/14/hannah-ramos-unequally-yoked-to-deconverted/

    Lars and Christie episode
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/09/26/lars-and-christie-deconverted-family/

    Deconversion
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/

    Secular Grace
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/

    Attribution
    "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
    https://makaihbeats.net/


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    • 1 hr 5 min
    Phil Quagliariello: PK, IFB, Emergent church and Insurrection

    Phil Quagliariello: PK, IFB, Emergent church and Insurrection

    My guest this week is Phil Quagliariello who blogs at Phil Q Musings. Phil grew up as a PK in Independent Fundamentalist Baptist Churches which, of course, were the one true Church. He moved around often as a kids and saw the dark side of ministry when his father was removed from a church by the board for being too “new fangled.” He went through the entirety of his education including college in Christian schools.

    Phil eventually found himself in Calvary Chapel churches were they were more exegetical, focused on the Bible. He got married and they both were worship leaders. Eventually, the concept of the “Emergent Church” came to their church and Phil lead the worship for that service. Unfortunately, that marriage did not last. Phil found himself seeking a church experience that was more authentic and “that did not suck.” He found a faith community that met in the basement of a bar that at first he found satisfying.

    Phil remarried to a women with two children. These children and the children they have together became the light of his life. Phil began to recognize the trauma of his upbringing: the fear of punishment and the fear of Hell. And he focused on being parent who does not use fear as a weapon.

    Phil began to seriously doubt Evangelicalism during the 2016 election. But he still hung on to the church experience until the Jan 6th election when he could no longer call himself an Evangelical, a Christian or a believer.

    Phil has a particularly good answer to how he finds meaning in his life.

    Links
    Phil Q Musings Blog
    https://philqmusings.wordpress.com/

    Interact
    Ginna’s Episode
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/10/10/ginna-deconversion-anonymous/

    Deconversion
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/

    Secular Grace
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/

    Attribution
    "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
    https://makaihbeats.net/


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    • 1 hr 12 min
    Jack Robertson: Deconversion of an ADD mind

    Jack Robertson: Deconversion of an ADD mind

    My guest this week is Jack Robertson, host of the Musings of an ADD mind podcast. He grew up with a super Evangelical Southern Baptist mother and always went to church. As a teenager he became super religious himself until a confidant let the whole youth group know he was having sex with his girlfriend. Then he stopped going to church for a while.

    Then late in his 30s Jack got heavily involved in an Oklahoma City based megachurch. He read through the bible three times.

    But, jack always had questions. “In the Exodus story god is the bad guy, not Pharaoh. If man was created in god’s image then wicked pre-flood people that were so evil he needed to destroy the world would be a reflection of him.”

    Jack asks himself if he really believed or if it was his ADD hyper focus on Christianity that kept him in for so long.

    After a friend asked for prayer for a job interview it hit him, “how would god decide? Go with whoever had the most friends pray? The person who’s friends prayed the most? Use a prayer version of comment winner generator?”

    After a deep dive into Mesopotamian history he realized it was all just stories.

    The 2016 election and then his son coming out as bi-sexual finalized his decision. He no longer believes

    Links
    Musings of an ADD Mind
    https://open.spotify.com/show/0ebZTxuf9YUOrT58H4TvRK?si=DpVTS3YwSU-BuyGTEyy5lw&utm_source=copy-link

    Website
    https://www.podpage.com/musings-of-an-add-mind/

    Facebook page
    https://www.facebook.com/musngsofanaddmind/

    Interact
    Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
    https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion

    Jon Steingard
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/01/03/jon-steingard-the-wonder-and-the-mystery-of-being/

    Deconversion
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/

    Secular Grace
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/

    Attribution
    "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
    https://makaihbeats.net/


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    • 55 min
    Mark Landes: Military, Deconversion and Humanism

    Mark Landes: Military, Deconversion and Humanism

    My guest this week is Mark Landes, a former Army officer who is working toward becoming a humanist chaplain. Mark grew up in the United Methodist tradition. He went to West Point and became an officer in the Army. He wanted to become an Army chaplain.

    Mark’s army career is a fascinating tale in itself. He was stationed in West Berlin shortly before the fall of the Berlin Wall. Then during the Gulf War he volunteered to go to Kuwait and experienced the first air raid of the Gulf War. Mark was also a gay man in the military before the time of “don’t ask don’t tell” when there were witch hunts to remove gay military members. He was investigated and removed with an “other than honorable” discharge.

    Understandably, Mark went through time of deep depression. To make maters worse when he returned to the states he joined a 12 step group that was in effect a group conversion therapy. It is during this dark time of his life that Mark began to question the reality of god. Through a years long process Mark deconverted eventually admitting to himself he no longer believed.

    Mark has since become a humanist celebrant and has made an attempt to get a Masters in Divinity to become a humanist chaplain. In this process he began his “theological anthropology” which has led him to tell his story. He now wants to get a Masters in Pastoral care and is hoping to create an “institutional chaplaincy” in the business world. This humanist journey began with him asking the question, “how can I make the world a better place?”

    Links
    Mark’s Blog
    https://humanistchaplainjourney.blogspot.com/

    Captain Cassidy
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2019/10/17/captain-cassidy-roll-to-disbelieve/

    Sasha Sagan
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2020/02/06/sasha-sagan-for-small-creatures-such-as-we/

    Interact
    Full show notes
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/10/24/mark-landes-military-deconversion-and-humanism/

    Deconversion
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/

    Secular Grace
    https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/

    Attribution
    "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
    https://makaihbeats.net/

    Thanks to Logan Thomas for the new Graceful Atheist Podcast art work


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    • 1 hr 4 min

Customer Reviews

4.8 out of 5
85 Ratings

85 Ratings

Sabetha77 ,

Testimonies are still important!

I can see why these stories of deconstructed atheists are so important for those of us who are deconstructing. We were taught to believe through the testimonies of others. Now we can learn to think for ourselves and figure out all the harm and trauma we’ve gone through by hearing the stories of others. In all the ways that our minds have been manipulated to think, testimonies help give us steppingstones on the way out.

Suzie Baloozie ,

Great podcast!

Love this podcast. Insightful, kind, interesting. Love all the interesting interviews.

Olegrrl ,

Fantastic Interviewing

David is one of the best interviewers in the post-Christian space. He does a good balance of driving the show by asking thoughtful questions while also allowing the interviewee to respond in full.

My favorite thing about the show is the focus on being genuine and having an 'honesty contest.'

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