Power Struggles: How To Avoid Them With Your Child
Tips for avoiding power struggles with special guest Philip Motts.
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Power Struggles TRANSCRIPT:
Kristina: Welcome, impactful parent. Today we‘re going to talk about power struggles in our family.
Hello, my name is Kristina Campos. I am the founder of The Impactful Parent. I help parents of school-aged children turn their chaos into connection with their adolescence. I offer free parent education videos every week, online courses, and coaching. If that wasn‘t enough, I bring experts in on other fields onto The Impactful Parent state to teach you even more.
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Today I have a special guest. His name is Philip Mott. Philip is a homeschooling dad of three kids. He is a monthly contributor to the magazines The First Time Parent and Fatheringtogether.org. I‘m very happy to have him here today to talk about power struggles.
Let‘s get started right away. I want to ask you, Why do you think that power struggles are so prevalent in family life?
Philip: I think it starts with parental perception. Many parents believe that we are the sole responsibility for bringing up and training our kids. There is a fault in this thinking. When our children defy us, we assume that they don‘t want to do it with this mentality, so we have to make them do it. This puts us in opposition to their desires, and parents try to force the children through things.
Kristina: From my experience, power struggles stem from the parents wanting to control a little too much. This isn’t necessarily the parents‘ fault. It usually comes from a place of love, where they just don‘t like to see their child mess up. They don‘t want to see the child hurt. They don‘t want to see the child fail. Coupled with years of being an authority figure and having control over their children in their younger years, it is difficult to change as the child gets older. The tween and teen years start to emerge. Now your adolescent starts to gain independence and wants to break free of the reins of control. The power struggles are amplified.
Philip: Yeah, absolutely. It starts early on when the child starts to develop their own ideas. If we don‘t approach the child’s new ideas by getting on the same page and working together toward a common goal, the power struggles increase.
Kristina: How would you advise a parent to avoid the struggle of power?
Philip: Let me give you an example of what to do…
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