It's an Inside Job Kid, a memoir of trauma alcohol and drug abuse, mental illness& love -Steve Moffe Beat Your Addictions

On today's episode of Beat Your Addictions John Giordano interviews author Steve Moffe


About Steve-
Steve grew up during the 60's and 70's in a large family; he was the fifth of seven children. Their home was located in the rough part of a small city near a railroad depot in Elmira, New York. It was a blue collar community of upstate New York, consisting of Eastern European, Black, Italian, and Irish immigrants. My father(Italian decent) had a six grade education, and my mother (Irish) having a high school diploma. Steve had suffered from a severe head trauma at the age of one. In his early years, he, his mother and siblings suffered from physical and emotional abuse by his father. Through his formative years in school, he struggled with undiagnosed dyslexia, and had a very difficult time throughout his education until high school.


During his 'formative' years and long after he left his home, his parents’ marriage was a very contentious one, and affected him deeply as of course it would negatively affect most kids. Personally, Steve considered himself a loner with the exception of one or two close friends, he tended to isolate more often than not. For the most part, when it came to adolescence (and) girls, he was a bit naïve and shy until he began using alcohol that arguably changed his life and his behavior; and not for the good.

Although he considers his childhood has being a very difficult one, in part because of his life choices, but predominantly much of it because of his father's outbursts of rage and anger towards his mother, siblings and himself, there were a number of good childhood memories too. All of that aside, Steve struggled growing up. At the age of about thirteen he began drinking, having sex and smoking marijuana. Between the years of 13 and 18 drinking was a part of his life mostly on weekends and holidays, except for his high school years while participating in sports he did behave. By in-large, Steve was more or less dedicated to his sports and avoided Imbibing during these times.


All of that change after his early discharge from the United States Navy, and a few unforeseen events while entering and during his time in the service that changed the direction of his life forever. He was discharged after nine months, and his drinking began again, and use of several street drugs. His life floundered for time after his discharge until he found a job as an orderly and ICU technician at a local hospital. He was good at what he did, but his life coping skills were pretty much nonexistent as he had turned to more and more to alcohol and drugs to cope with life issues and his past, until he was married; he chose to leave the drinking and drugging to his past at least for awhile. He was married for 20 years with two beautiful daughters who are now married and successful in their chosen professions. Early in his marriage came the loss of his brother to AIDS in 1993, then the drinking and drugs came back into the picture.
Compared to Steve's childhood, it seems his daughters we're spared the abuse that he suffered, however, although Steve avoided the negative traits of being physically and emotional abusive towards his daughters, his torment lies in the fact that he wasn't always present as a full-time father because of turning to alcohol or drugs to cope with the loss of his brother and loathing his career as a prison guard. These circumstances lead to years of him being treated with psychotropic drugs to control his mental illness and eventually, electroconvulsive therapy( shock treatments); in addition to being in and out of mental health facilities and years later, a second alcohol and substance-abuse rehab.