I've Got Nothing To Say (but it's okay) is a podcast about whatever happens to come out of my mouth when the recorder is turned on. To hear (and see) other stuff produced by me (and other members of my family), please go to palen.com.
037 - Annual Episode
This podcast is now a running gag. A long con. What started in 2014 as an earnest attempt to do a weekly podcast has become the equally earnest joke of doing an annual podcast. Enjoy!
036 - Annual Episode
Last January, when I recorded my first episode of 2018, I asked the prophetic question, “Will it also be my last episode of 2018?”. The answer turned out to be “yes”. Hence my use of the word “prophetic”. Now, after recording my first episode of 2019, I will not ask that same question. Instead, I will just say... enjoy my annual podcast episode!
035 - Envy is Stupid
After doing 23 episodes in 2016, I only did one episode in 2017. My excuse? I don’t want to talk about it. What I do want to talk about is envy being stupid. So I do talk about it in this episode. I also talk about a bunch of other stuff. Interested? Intrigued? Incarcerated? Then please listen to my first episode of 2018. Will it also be my last episode of 2018? Or will I actually maintain a semi-regular schedule this year? There’s no earthly way of knowing... which direction we are going... there's no knowing where we're rowing... or which way the river's flowing...
034 - Stand-Up or Sit-Down?
In a parallel universe, I did a 3-minute set at The Comedy Store open mic tonight. In this universe, I sat on the toilet and talked to myself for 30 minutes. For what it's worth, I'd like to note that when I recorded this, I didn't intend on sharing it. I thought it was only going to be heard by a future self. Then I decided to share it. Why the change of heart? How would I know? You're asking me why I do things? Have you been listening to anything I've said?
033 - Continuing Comedy and Quitting Politics
I had my best set since returning to stand-up. If it were any other night, that would have dominated this episode. But this wasn't any other night. It was election night. And, if I stick to my plan, it was the last night I give a shit about anything going on in the world outside of my personal experience. Sour grapes? Yup. Sore loser? Indeed. And you know what? I don't care. The person who's apparently going to be our President is a vile creature who spews endless venom. I quit drinking earlier this year. Now it's time to rid myself of political poison.
032 - Podcast Within A Podcast
Unlike last week, there was no grappling this week with the decision of whether or not to call in for a spot at The Comedy Store's open mic. Why? I have no idea. I called. I got a spot. I performed. This episode was recorded before and after performing. It's a podcast within a podcast. Eat my dust, Shakespeare!