Only rarely do you find a woman who is so open and honest about their struggles in an effort to make it easier for the next woman.
Jana and her husband Mike have been through their fair share of ups and downs, and unlike those of us who want to suffocate their husband with a pillow while they sleep but then post a gushy lovey #husbandgoals! Instagram the next morning - Jana and Mike keep it REAL.
I read Jana and Mike’s book The Good Fight and felt like I had been on a cleansing couple’s therapy retreat. In one of the first pages Jana mentions that when she first met Mike she wondered what in the world they would ever fight about - they were so in love and life was perfect. I was taken back to when I first met my husband... I had that very same thought ️...
HA! What a naive little twit I was.
As any of us in a marriage or any partnership know - there is a honeymoon phase and then reality sets in. Life happens. Shit goes down and stress levels go up. To maintain a marriage you have to work at it every single day. There are good days and there are bad days. There are days when every little thing makes you want to slap the person upside the head and there are days where you’re overflowing with gratitude that God led you to this person - and that is NORMAL.
Before I got married I thought a lot about what marriage MEANS. Coming from a broken home I even listened to The Meaning of Marriage audiobook after I got engaged to make sure I understood exactly what I was getting into here (but then turned it off when the guy said “a wife should serve her husband” or some shit like that I was like nah we ain’t about that life) But my point is — I think a lot of people get married for the wrong reasons and without fully knowing what they’re committing to. They want to check a box, make their parents happy, align with societal expectations or get a VISA a la @90dayfiance - we make a vow for better or for worse - but half of our population doesn’t make it until death do us part.
Jana says people are so quick to “eject” from a relationship these days, but unless you own your part in the trouble, then your next relationship will be the same story - just with a different cast of characters. AIN'T THAT THE TRUTH.
This isn’t to say if you split ✂️ it’s wrong or you’ve failed - not at all - I think there are many cases where peacing out is the move, I just also think we live in a grass is greener / shiny object chasing society and taking a good look in the mirror and a healthy dose of empathy can do any couple good.
We all read tabloids and think and judge and create ill informed-opinions, and that sucks for people in the spotlight (who are human beings... with feelings...FYI) but for the record - it is admirable and refreshing that after everything this couple has suffered through, they are CHOOSING to day in and day out work on themselves, learn about their partner, better their relationship and fighting The Good Fight.