Journal Gently: Helping Introverted Women Find Healing After Grief, Hurt, and Trauma Kari Bartkus, Spiritual Director for Christian Women

Have you ever tried to grow stronger by lifting weights?
I’m not much of a weight-lifter myself, but I know the drill. Start with a low weight and slowly increase it, making it a bit heavier each time. With each successive uplevel, you build more muscle.
Or what about running a marathon? Most of us don’t start out running an entire mile. We start with a block. Maybe we even just walk that block. And we slowly build the endurance we need to go longer, to go faster.
The same thing happens with us personally. As we try to eat healthier or we try to grow in our cooking skills, the best way to grow is bit by bit.
But it does take pushing yourself. Doing something uncomfortable. Maybe even a little scary.
And that’s what this episode is all about: how God has invited me to push myself a little bit to grow and reach more people.
This has been happening in a lot of different ways, but we’re going to focus on just one today: changing the name of the podcast.
Kari
 
RELATED EPISODES:
·       Episode 44: Why is Change So Hard? Understanding the Change Process and What That Means for Being Healed and Helping Others
______
>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 ways to encounter God on the pages of your journal
http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop
>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God
http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently
>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain
http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection
 
Music by DappyTKeys

Grief impacts all of us in different ways. And today, I want to share a special conversation I had with Natasha Smith.
Natasha has a book that is releasing today called Can You Just Sit With Me? And, my friend, it is such a lovely book. She shares her grief story and then she writes about some of the things you’ll hear us talk about today:
·       Types of grief
·       Iterations of healing
·       Feelings of grief and loss
·       Telling our stories
·       Collective grief
·       And how to handle grief when it feels overwhelming
I know that grief isn’t always a fun topic. But I dare say that what Natasha shares is both encouraging and hopeful. Be sure to reach out to her after the episode ends to thank her for sharing with us today, and be sure to grab a copy of her book, as well.
Kari
 
MEET NATASHA:
Natasha Smith is a wife, mom, and NC native. She is a writer, speaker, and podcaster, who shares stories on faith, family, and grief. She has inspired others through her writing for over 12 years. Her work has appeared in Guideposts and Focus on the Family print publications. And Her View From Home, TODAY Parents, Pray with Confidence, and other e-publications.
 
CONNECT WITH NATASHA:
·       Website
·       Book: Can You Just Sit With Me?
 
RELATED EPISODES:
·       Episodes 9 + 10: Supporting a Friend Through Grief (And Walking Through It Yourself) with Karen Altizer
·       Episode 50: Gritty Faith in the Midst of Grief with Prayer Artist Jessy Paulson
·       Episode 93: After the Flowers Die: An Honest Talk About Grief with Author Renee Leonard Kennedy
·       Episode 102: Sitting with Others in their Grief and Loss with Grief Coach Julie Lynn Ashley
______
>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal
http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop
>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God
http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently
>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain
http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection

I’m not sure where you live, but it seems like every location these days is experiencing some sort of disaster: wildfires, tornadoes, hurricanes, tsunamis, floods.
It’s one thing to experience that on a personal level—let’s say your basement floods after a heavy rain. But it’s another thing to experience that as a community or entire region.
I’ve learned that I often have no idea of either the short-term or long-term impact of such a disaster. Not until I had this conversation with Jamie Aten.
Jamie is the co-founder of Spiritual First Aid. He also provides leadership in several programs for humanitarian and disaster relief, including the Trauma Certificate Program at Wheaton College.
On a personal level, though, he has experienced disaster and trauma of his own as a Hurricane Katrina and late-stage early onset cancer survivor.
So Jamie has not only done the research, he has experienced it for himself. And what he has to share is enlightening and encouraging.
If you or your church have been praying about ways to support those experiencing the impact of disaster, I can’t wait for you to hear what he has to share.
We start by defining disaster and then move into the impact disaster can have on someone’s life and how we can support them. He isn’t just generous with his knowledge; Jamie has a ton of examples to share along the way. 
Kari
 
MEET JAMIE: 
JAMIE ATEN, P H . D . , is Co-Founder of Spiritual First Aid. He is also the Founder and Co-Director of Humanitarian Disaster Institute, Blanchard Chair of Humanitarian and Disaster Leadership, and Co-Coordinator of the Trauma Certificate Program at Wheaton College. Personally, he is both a Hurricane Katrina and late-stage early onset cancer survivor. Professionally, as a disaster psychologist he has responded to and researched disasters and mass traumas around the globe. He is cohost of The Better Samaritan Blog and Podcast at Christianity Today. You can follow Jamie on Twitter at @drjamieaten.
 
RELATED EPISODES + RESOURCES:
·       Church Mental Health Summit: http://lovedoesthat.org/mentalhealth23
·       Spiritual First Aid: An 8-session certification course on responding to trauma
·       Episode 16: Trauma-Informed Care: Being the Cover for Those Who are Hurting with Kristen Brock
______
>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal
http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop
>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God
http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently
>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain
http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection

Healing has layers. No, not in the physical sense, like you can pile one layer on top of the other. But we heal from different parts of grief at different times, and sometimes even revisit some areas we thought we had processed already. 
But instead of using the famous onion example of peeling back one layer at a time, I’m choosing to make it a little more personal and look at healing in layers like my art is done in layers.
I’m guessing you, too, have some sort of creative streak in you, whether that’s baking or knitting or decorating. And you can translate this metaphor to the art that you love.
But let’s take a look at the practical example of how art or other creative endeavors take place in layers and then see how this might illustrate our own journey with grief.
Kari
 
RELATED EPISODES + RESOURCES: 
·       Episodes 9 and 10: Supporting a Friend Through Grief (And Walking Through It Yourself) with Karen Altizer
·       Episode 50: Gritty Faith in the Midst of Grief with Prayer Artist Jessy Paulson
·       Episode 102: Sitting with Others in their Grief and Loss with Grief Coach Julie Lynn Ashley
·       Journal Gently: 8-week Grief Journaling Program
·       Hospice Foundation
·       GriefShare: Grief Support Groups
·       Julie Lynn Ashley: Grief Coaching
·       Not My Story Podcast, Episode 34: “Grief and Joy Can Coexist”
______
>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal
http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop
>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God
http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently
>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain
http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection

Today’s conversation is going to be a bit of a heart-to-heart. Because I’ve seen something in my own life that I’m guessing might be happening in yours.
It’s something that is hurting a lot of my relationships. It’s hurting people that I love.
And I certainly don’t intend for that to be happening. Yet all too often, I don’t do what it takes to change, to fix it, to do what it takes to make things better.
What I’m talking about is letting hurt from my past preventing me from loving those around me well.
I know that many of you are here because you have someone you love who is hurting, and you want to do everything you can to support them through it.
But you, too, are hurting. You’re carrying grief or trauma or abuse or illness or depression or uncertainty or fear around.
And it’s not just hurting you, it’s hurting those around you.
Today, I’m going to share some examples of how I see it playing out, and I just invite you to consider if there is some way that hurt from your past is hurting those you love without you even realizing it. 
Kari 
______
>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal
http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop
>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God
http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently
>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain
http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection

I don’t know about you, but I love me a good book. There’s just something about sitting down and getting lost in another world for a while—and often gleaning a lesson or two along the way.
That’s why I’ve enjoyed recommended some books to you this year. And today is no different.
I have a book—well, actually a series of books—that I really couldn’t recommend more. A series that is good for you and any students you might have in your life, too.
You already know the series if you’ve seen the title to this episode, but allow me to ease my way into mentioning it to you here…
Kari
 
RELATED EPISODES + RESOURCES: 
·       Book Series: The Wingfeather Saga
·       Song: Is He Worthy, by Andrew Peterson
·       Episode 124: [Book Recommendation] Visit the Sick by Brian Croft
·       Episode 120: [Book Recommendation] Invitation to Retreat by Ruth Haley Barton
·       Episode 114: [Book Recommendation] The Powerful Purpose of Introverts by Holley Gerth
·       Episode 110: [Book Recommendation] The Next Right Thing by Emily P. Freeman
·       Episode 105: [Book Recommendation] Every Moment Holy by Douglas Kaine McKelvey
·       Episode 100: [Book Recommendation] Sensible Shoes Series by Sharon Garlough Brown
______
>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal
http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop
>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God
http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently
>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain
http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection