Leverage Podcast featuring Scott and Orlena Ballard, Leverage clients, partners at Confidence Coach and in life.
In this episode, Brittney Martinson, Head of Client Success at Leverage talks to Scott and Orlena Ballard about a unique task they’ve outsourced to Leverage:
“Need a VA to made a dinner reservation every Thursday Night at 7:15pm for my wife and me”
At Confidence Coach, Scott and Orlena coach their clients on how to have success in their business - but also in your most important relationships. Married for 37 years, dating for 40 — Scott and Orlena know that their marriage is their #1 priority in life and you need to put the work into it to make it last.
“You can have the greatest amount of success in a Business, but if you don’t have any personal relationships that are enriching, that are better, that are growing, that are deeper in love - what do you really have?” —Scott Ballard.
Any success principles learned in business can be directly related into relationships, and vice versa. In business, you have to invest time and resources, have a plan and strategy - the same goes for a marriage. Business is driven by human relationship, so using relationship practices as well in business drives success. How you take care of your customers and how you take care of your spouse should be very similar.
“If we don’t have this [marriage], then we don’t have anything… We can do all the work, all the business, all of the success but If we aren’t having success in our relationship it all doesn’t really matter.” —Scott Ballard
To build a relationship - you need to invest and keep taking it to the next level. Scott and his wife are committed to Thursday Date Nights to continue to invest in their marriage and relationship. Scott used Leverage to get creative about their date nights and free up his brain-space to instead plan their conversations and ask questions during the dates which was most important part of that time together.
What’s the Formula for the Perfect Date: Consistency + Curiosity + Caring
Block off the time your schedule, so life can’t schedule other things into the date nights. It’s has to become a priority, a non-negotiable.
Curiosity: Date with a Purpose
Each Date, Scott comes up with 1-3 questions to ask Orlena, and to have Orlena ask him. By leading the conversation this way, it becomes more real, honest and has more depth. The questions can be about their life, how to serve, love and be better in their relationship. There is a lot that Scott continues to learn, wasn’t aware of or has changed about his wife. Learning something a new partner after 40 years is the same experience as a first date. “Wow this is an amazing person” and earn to learn more about them.
Here are some example questions provided by this power couple:
What is one thing can I do to better serve you in our relationship?
Tell me about an experience when you were a child when you experienced great joy?
What would make you feel more loved in this situation (whatever that situation is) - how do we lovingly work through this?
What are your expectations for our relationship in the next year, how do you see us growing?
Using this time to really listen to your spouse. During off all distractions, leave your phones and apple watches in the car. Dedicate this time to your spouse. The date is supposed to be relaxing and enjoyable, so the ambiance of the date is important. Dress-up! It doesn’t have to be wildly romantic, but strut your stuff!
“If you want to have a relationship to last for a lifetime it’s about commitment, not emotions, feeling or love. It’s about saying you’re committed to this person for a lifetime, and from there the real joy and love can grow. Committed and you’re going to do the work no matter what.” — Scott Ballard
How can you expect a marriage to be great in 10 years if you don’t p