Posptartum Depression is real. And it's only part of the story. We dig in to ALL of the stuff that no tells you about, but you NEED to know. Dr. Kat, Psychologist and specialist in perinatal mental health, interviews moms, dads, experts and advocates about how to cope, manage and recover from perinatal mood and anxiety disorders. We talk about postpartum depression, postpartum anxiety and SO MUCH MORE! We get real. We get honest. We put on our stigma crushing boots and address the realities of the transition to motherhood and parenthood. Learn about it before you find out about it the hard way! You don't have to suffer! www.momandmind.com
198: Pressure of Perfectionism in Motherhood
Do you identify as a perfectionist? Do you feel like things need to be a certain way and if they aren't, you feel unsettled? How did that affect you when you were trying to conceive, during pregnancy, birthing or postpartum?
This is one of those things that really impacts the early stages of motherhood and parenthood (and all stages really). In this episode, I talk about the dynamics that I see with the mamas that I help...and one that I struggled with in my postpartum...and still work on managing. I touch on how it even impacted the recording of this episode.
Some of the things we address on this episode...
*The struggle with feeling the need to be perfect
*It seems that perfectionism often comes with a high sense of morality and conscientiousness - I believe that this makes intrusive thoughts even more unbearable.
*Perfectionism often develops as a way to cope and manage life. But that way of coping goes head to head with the challenges of new parenthood.
*The stress of perfectionism, can make getting help feel hard. Help can feel SLOW or inadequate.
*Accepting that we can't be perfect is very hard, and it's part of the key to healing.
If you identify with any of this, take a listen to the episode, give yourself a big hug and please know that this is not a judgment of you. Please know that you can find a new way to cope that is more forgiving to yourself.
If you'd like, please check out the blog post on the Postpartum Support International Blog that I mentioned: Soul Level Crisis
Please pass this episode along to any person who could benefit!
If you haven't yet subscribed to the podcast head over to www.momandmind.com
We welcome ratings, reviews, sharing the podcast and spreading the word about perinatal mental health! Lets crush this together!
197: Burnout and Managing Overwhelm with Dr. Kat
How are you? Sometimes it’s hard to check in with ourselves in the busy-ness of daily life, especially in these pandemic days when our self-care options are limited. High stress, depression, and anxiety tend to feel like personal failure. In today’s show, I want to offer you perspective and encouragement.
How to interpret your feelings during moments of stress How to approach the new considerations brought on by the pandemic: masks, social distancing, virtual connections, etc. Why life is hard in many ways right now for most people Tips on how you can feel better: Remember that you are resilient Getting help is NOT failure Honor your exhaustion by taking a break and setting boundaries Check in with your sleep, eating/hydration, hormones, and stress Turn “What’s wrong with me?” into “What’s going on for me?” Take time to reflect and allow space just to BE Resources:
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196: Reproductive Psychiatry, Latinx Psychiatrist, Pandemic Pregnancy and More
Today’s episode is packed with helpful information about taking medication during pregnancy and the postpartum period. We’ll also take a closer look at COVID-related issues and the vaccine as they relate to perinatal mental health. Join us to learn more.
Dr. Sarah Oreck is a Columbia University-trained psychiatrist who focuses on women’s mental wellness. In addition to her expertise in general and addiction psychiatry, Dr. Oreck is one of very few doctors with specialized training in reproductive psychiatry. She runs a private practice in which she combines the most up-to-date medical treatments with talk therapy, meditation, and a whole-body complementary approach. Dr. Oreck is passionate about teaching, and she regularly lectures at Cedars Sinai Hospital, UCLA, and The Providence Hospital System, in addition to her media work. She is actively involved in advocacy work and is a member of the Board of Directors of Maternal Mental Health Now.
An overview of the field of reproductive psychiatry--and how it helps people The “risk vs. risk” perspective regarding medication and perinatal mental health How Sarah talks to people about the risk of anxiety and depression Why mental health medications can be safer than untreated mental illness The dangers when physicians don’t keep up with new mental health research and literature How Sarah works to train and inform physicians about pregnancy and postpartum How Sarah’s individual clients benefit from her bilingual abilities due to her Colombian heritage The myths of motherhood in the Latin community that only magnify the need for a mental health focus Sarah’s observations about the impact of COVID on perinatal mood and anxiety disorders What it was like for Sarah to have her first baby during the COVID pandemic What we should know about the COVID vaccine regarding pregnancy and breastfeeding mothers How the stigmas around anxiety medication discourage people from taking medications that are necessary and life-saving What Sarah has seen in people getting the help, support, and connection that they need Resources:
Sarah Oreck MD
195: Paternal Postpartum Depression: David Levine
Today’s topic is important, but it is hugely stigmatized in our culture. You may not have even heard about paternal postpartum depression, but my guest today shares what he experienced with the births of his two children.
Dr. David Levine is a pediatrician in New Jersey. He was blindsided by postpartum depression because, like most of us, he thought it only happens to women. He shares the struggle of having to talk to his wife about it and how he found help. Even more surprising is that he experienced postpartum while working as a pediatrician. He completed his undergraduate degree at Rutgers College Medical School at NYU and his residency in pediatrics at Yale. Dr. Levine is not on the board of Postpartum Support International (PSI), where he works in professional outreach as a staunch advocate for fathers’ mental health. He’s written a book about his experience, which will hopefully be published soon to get the message out to fathers that they are not alone.
Why so little is known about postpartum mental health, especially concerning fathers David’s experience when his first child was born seven years ago How David felt his aggravation and agitation increase as his infant son cried and could not be calmed How David looked for support groups and resources for dads--and couldn’t find anything How he kept getting worse and started envisioning committing violence against his child: “It was like watching a horror movie in my mind.” How David finally told his wife about his depression and intrusive thoughts How David tried medication briefly and then hit rock-bottom around week 7 of his son’s life How David began his long road to recovery with therapy, a baby nurse, and more sleep How he gained confidence as a father and began to bond with his son when he was 3-4 months old How David began working with PSI and then had his second child three years ago How his experiences were very similar, yet very different with his daughter Why David feels that the traditional traps of masculinity kept him from seeking help earlier How men experience anxiety and depression much differently than women do Why postpartum depression in dads might manifest with anger, withdrawal from the family, and even physical violence The pushback from people who don’t believe that postpartum depression exists for fathers Why there should be more research, understanding, and resources for all aspects of male mental health The hard statistics about male and female depression How we can catch paternal postpartum depression better by teaching pediatricians to screen mothers AND fathers, and teaching obstetricians to inform mothers to check on dads David’s manuscript for his book and his determination to get it published Hopeful messages from David: “Paternal postpartum depression is fixable. We can prevent some of this from happening. With that, we can improve the lives of children and their parents and make stronger families.”
194: The Highly Sensitive Mother
We all know that the challenges of new motherhood can be many--and overwhelming. If you are an HSP (highly sensitive person), then those challenges may be magnified---and you probably aren’t focusing on any self-care. This topic resonates deeply with me and intrigues me in the way the trait interacts with motherhood and its challenges.
Julie Bjelland is an LMFT, an HSP psychotherapist, and the author of Brain Training for the Highly Sensitive Person: Techniques to Reduce Anxiety and Overwhelming Emotions. Julie’s mission is to help sensitive people reduce the challenges and increase the positives.Through her website specializing in highly sensitive people (the trait also known as Sensory Processing Sensitivity), she offers many valuable resources for both HSP’s and parents of sensitive children. Julie has a mission to spread awareness and education about the trait of high sensitivity and believes the world needs the gifts of sensitive people.
High sensitivity is a trait and not a disorder--and it’s NOT the same as introversion (30% of HSP’s are extroverts and 20% are introverts) From Elaine Aron’s work on HSP’s: Depth of Processing, Overstimulation, Emotionally responsive, and Sensitivity to subtle stimuli (DOES) The judgment around being sensitive and its connection to weakness How scientific research shows real brain differences in HSP’s On the positive side, HSP’s are more empathetic, more aware, and more compassionate Common for the HSP mother is to put themselves at the bottom of the priority list and take care of others first Trained HSP vs. untrained HSP Self-care---a conscious action you take to lower your stress and bring you to a balanced state A key for HSP’s is getting enough sleep in order to understand and meet specific needs An HSP mom’s default setting is to be hard on themselves and focus on everyone else’s needs Certain parts of the brain in HSP moms will be overactive, like merging into everyone else’s moods and experiences Many people who seek treatment for anxiety will also have the HSP trait How HSP contributes to overall perinatal depression and anxiety, since everything changes in mind, body, and spirit Why HSP’s need creative ways to get two hours of alone time each day The tendency to measure everything in ourselves and others against the standard of perfection Self-talk, with low levels of self-compassion and criticism of themselves Common characteristics of HSP’s: perfectionism, sleep-deprived, overstimulated, and misunderstood Steps to help HSP’s: Develop self-compassion (Kristin Neff outlines 3 steps) Take breaks when needed Practice mindfulness 50% of clients in therapy are HSP’s Supporting moms and dads better in pregnancy and the postpartum period could impact parenting differently and offer more support Using the right tools for support in children can prevent many problems and help them gain confidence and have an easier time accepting who they are
Brain Training for the Highly Sensitive Person: Techniques to Reduce Anxiety and Overwhelming Emotions.by Julie Bjelland
The Highly Sensitive Child by Dr. Elaine Aron
Self-Compassion by Kristin Neff
Find Julie on Facebook: The Highly Sensitive Person
Instagram: hsp psychotherapist
Postpartum Anxiety with Dr. Carly Snyder
Welcome to Mom and Mind, I’m your host, Dr. Kat. Anxiety is at an all time high with covid, political stress, social justice stress, holidays and collective stress. So we are re releasing this episode from 2 years ago, as it is one of the most commonly downloaded episodes.
We are talking about Postpartum Anxiety today and more specifically,
We touch on the ever present guilt and shame that runs its course through motherhood as well as some ways to cope and manage postpartum anxiety.
About Carly Snyder, M.D.
Dr. Carly Snyder is a Board Certified reproductive and perinatal psychiatrist with a unique approach that combines traditional psychiatry with integrative medicine-based treatments. Dr. Snyder received her medical degree from NYU School of Medicine and completed general psychiatry residency at Mount Sinai Beth Israel Medical Center with additional reproductive psychiatry elective training at the Payne Whitney Women’s Program at NY Presbyterian Weill Cornell Medical Center, where she remains voluntary faculty.
She maintains a private practice on the Upper East Side in NYC, and is working virtually due to COVID19.
Dr. Snyder was named a ‘2019, 2020 and 2021 New York Super Doctors Rising Star’ and is a frequent lecturer on the topic of women’s health and wellness. Her weekly radio and HuffPost parenting blog share the “MD for Moms” moniker. She also is a regular contributor to many popular websites and a member of the Women’s Mental Health Consortium and Robyn. Dr. Snyder served on the Board of Postpartum Support International (PSI) for multiple years and remains a member of the Advisory Council.
- What is "normal" anxiety in new motherhood
- How can people know when it's becoming more difficult or a clinical issue?
- What kinds of anxiety might a mother experience (types)
- Examples of cases?
- What is a side effect of the perinatal anxiety (guilt, shame, relationship problems, etc)
- what can they do to heal/cope/manage?
- Hopeful messages of repair/recovery?
Great Info, right?! The more we can understand these things, the easier it will be for us to cope and heal.
Carly's bio is here: https://www.carlysnydermd.com/about/credentials/
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/CarlySnyderMD
Twitter - @CarlySnyderMD
For this and all episodes of Mom and Mind, go to www.momandmind.com, join on on FB, twitter and IG as well as our FB group, Mom and Mind connection. Until next time!
Customer ReviewsSee All
Dr. Kat and her guests give amazing information to help moms through the ups and downs of pregnancy and postpartum. If you are looking for a community and resource while you raise young babies, this is it! I highly recommend subscribing and listening to these fantastic episodes.
I wish I had found this podcast while pregnant. But better late than never! It is such rich, valuable information that covers both real mom’s stories and expert opinions. It is education, real, and honest. More moms need access to this kind of information BEFORE they need it!
I been feeling so lost and out of place with a lot of thought that are not me feeling sad anxious scared and so much more some day are great while others are terrible I’ve been feeling like I’m loosing my mind and going “crazy” I stumbled upon your podcast and I believe it was episode 183 I couldn’t hold back my tears just hearing that I’m not alone and completely out of it thank you so much i hear so much about ppd but never about anxiety and fear thank you