Today I’m talking about moving to a new, better place in your life. The episode is about your inner bully and how you can transition your life to be more, to accomplish more, to do everything you believe is possible. That’s why I entitled the episode, Move Into Possible. Becoming more mindful will help you when you learn what it means to deal with your Inner Bully. I remember when I started the podcast back in 2015, a lot of people would give me a blank stare when I said my podcast was going to be about Mindfulness and Bullying and how a lot of us Bully Ourselves, causing incredible hardships, pushing us into doing terrible things we’d never normally do, forcing us to listen to terrible, negative and mean stories about ourselves.
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That Inner Bully is always at work. But most people didn’t realize that Mindfulness and Bullying are closely related. The themes of my shows tell a story about so many of my coaching clients that have come to me. I could tell you story after story about so many of my awesome Mindful Tribe listeners who have reached out for coaching from me. The thing is, the stories are similar in many ways.
The common denominators are anxiety, stress, frustration, money’s not flowing, relationships are breaking, businesses aren’t clicking. And I get it. I’ve been there.
I had so much anxiety when I was an adolescent, I could barely operate in the world. I was ashamed and embarrassed. I was afraid to speak, my voice was a high, squeaky, remnant of what it was supposed to be. I felt defeated and didn’t have any idea what to do about it.
The Inner Bully
My inner bully was thriving at the time. It told me, “no one wants to hear from you”. “Just keep your mouth shut, and don’t do anything to attract attention to yourself”.
Even though my inner bully was robust and healthy, there was a little voice inside me that wouldn’t give up.
Who is Reme?
That other voice inside me was the Real Me. I didn’t know it at the time, but the Real Me was like a flickering candle that wouldn’t go out. Sometimes the flicker was almost invisible, hidden behind something, or fading to almost nothing, but it was there. Real Me was my friend and I was grateful for him. After while, I started to know Real Me as Reme (or Remy). I shortened him to the first 2 letters of each word and I started to get to know Reme even better.
A Flicker of Hope
Reme told me there was hope. He told me to push forward and, Take Action – push ahead. Don’t give up. He was a great friend. He was on my side. Every time I thought of Reme, I knew he was Real Me, the person I was meant to be.
I learned so much from Reme that I have shared over the years with all of you who asked me for help, all my coaching clients.
Now I’ll tell you right now, I never told most of you that I had named this guy, Reme. I think my Inner Bully had convinced me that Reme was a stupid name and I needed to keep that to myself.
It was never easy deciphering which voice was which. My Inner Bully was so cunning and tricky, he would pose as Reme and I’d sometimes get tricked.
But like I said, when Reme got me to take action, everything improved and I would feel better, I would feel successful, I’d accomplish things in my life.
Then as more and more people came to me, because they knew I was a Mindfulness Life Coach, I was able to help them with their Inner Bully.
I remember one client, I’ll call her Natalie, I mean confidentiality is huge in coaching so for a long time I never talked about my coaching clients at all, then I realized I needed to ask them if I could share their stories. Natalie said yes, but she preferred I didn’t use her real name.
She came to me because of a work situa