Overcoming Porn Means Changing Beliefs Thrive Beyond Pornography (Formerly The Self Mastery Podcast)

Episode 193I'm Zach. And I'm Darcy. We're an LDS couple who struggled with unwanted pornography in our marriage for many years. What was once our greatest struggle and something we thought would destroy us, has become our greatest blessing in trying. Our hope is that as you listen to our podcast each week, you'll be filled with hope and healing and realize that you too can thrive beyond pornography and create the marriage you have always desired.
Welcome to Thrive Beyond Pornography. We're so glad you're here and we believe in you.
Hello, my friends. Welcome to Thrive Beyond Pornography. I'm your host, Zach Spafford. I used to believe that I was an addict. Happy Mother's Day, by the way. I think I think, I hope you had a great mother's day, or your wife had a great Mother's Day, or your girlfriend or whoever. I hope that your Mother's Day was amazing.
I used to believe that I was an addict. Whether or not that idea was true or not really isn't the point. What that belief did for me and to me is what I'd like to actually discuss today. So beliefs are a pretty strange thing. They are ideas, understandings, and concepts that help us navigate the world and tell us who we are and they can hold us back or they can drive us forward.
What we believe is really important to the life that we create, what we believe can also really be difficult to change because most of us believe what we think. When thoughts come into our mind, we often believe that they are true, and often we follow the path that they offer us In terms of our actions.
I've talked about this on the podcasts before. I've talked about it in other podcasts that I've done and on other podcasts shows that I've done. But the fastest way to change our beliefs is to change our actions. And I believe that this is true because we can take action in a different direction from our beliefs.
When I feel. Frustrated. I can take an action towards taking care of something instead of staying and being frustrated. I have kids, the example I've often given is I don't want to clean up vomit ever, but I have kids and they have vomited. And there's no amount of, belief work that's gonna help me stop believing that I don't want to clean up vomit.
But if I take action in the direction of what I value, I'm gonna clean that vomit up. But I wanna set aside for a few minutes that idea and just focus on our thoughts and how we can address them in a meaningful way, especially in the face of what seems like a desire to not act. You know when it comes to porn, That's what we're choosing.
That's what we're working on. We're working on not choosing something. We're not doing something which is slightly different than moving towards our values by doing something. When thinking about a problem that seems unfixable or too difficult to resolve new perspectives and unconventional ideas can often be the key to overcoming the obstacles that are holding you back.
So today, To help you with your beliefs, I want to give you three examples of ways you can approach your thoughts and beliefs in a different way. In these examples, I'm gonna share with you some questions that you can ask yourself as you work through overcoming pornography and start creating the life that you want.
So the first thought or the first idea that I want to address is porn is bad and addictive. Starting with this one, which if you are listening to this podcast right now is probably something that you have believed or that you might believe, or that you believe just a little bit, and I think it's a very important thought to address.
Now, you might believe only part of this thought, but it doesn't matter how much of it you do believe. What matters is that at some level, in some way, you believe this thought and is holding you back. Now you might be asking yourself, how can this idea that porn is bad and addictive behold me back? I do believe it, and I know it must...