Real Talk: How Can Parents Address Bullying?
In this week's episode of 'Real Talk,' Susan and Kristina dive deep into the topic of bullying. Discovering that your child is either being bullied or is the one doing the bullying can be incredibly challenging for parents. However, it's crucial to be informed. Join us in this episode to learn about the necessary steps you should take, the responsibilities schools have, and how you, as a parent, can ensure your child is protected. Tune in for valuable insights and practical advice. LINKS MENTIONED IN THE SHOW: https://studentdefense.kjk.com/ https://www.instagram.com/stonesupler/ TRANSCRIPT: Susan Stone: Welcome back to Real Talk with Susan Stone and Kristina Supler. We are full time moms and attorneys bringing our student defense legal practice to life with real candid conversations. Susan Stone: Well, good morning. Kristina Supler: Good morning, my friend. Susan Stone: Gosh, I don't know about you, but I'm exhausted. I’m just so tired. Every bone in my body feels tired. Kristina Supler: It's funny you say that, because this morning, for the first time in an unknown eternity, my alarm went off to go to the gym, and I chose not to get up. I went back to bed and then another hour and a half to sleep. Susan Stone: I've had a lot of those mornings and I'm wondering what's contributing to the exhaustion. Any ideas on your part? I just think it's we're really busy. Kristina Supler: We've had a busy January. We've had a lot of hearings. We have a lot of tough cases that I think we both really care about. And, you know, our work is it's not work that you can do if you don't care. You know, I mean, what do you think? Susan Stone: Yeah, You know, I try very hard and I know you do to to separate work from home because our family does. Yeah, but I take it home. I carry it in my heart. I carry every client in my heart. And it's hard. Kristina Supler: It's hard to turn off your brain at night and stop thinking about these really significant issues that, you know, we've spent hours all day sorting through. But then you go home and, you know, my children are younger, obviously, as you know, I'm in mom mode cooking dinner and helping with homework. And last night we were making cookies for a school presentation on Friday, and it was kind of like, my gosh, the last thing I want to do, but you have to do it. Susan Stone: You've got to do it. And I know that I worked last night after I made dinner and I just was losing patience for the client and it was more just fatigue on my part. Kristina Supler: Yeah. Susan Stone: So I need to recharge and so do you. What do you do to recharge? Kristina Supler: that's a good question, because it can be a couple of different things. For me, sometimes it's just having a weekend that's unscheduled, you know, not having a million activities, but then also sleep and exercise and just sort of having some time for myself and not feeling like I'm running around all weekend, you know, taking care of other people. But I mean, what about you? Susan Stone: Yeah, I don't know. I, I don't know. I keep thinking about it. It's a moving needle. But one of the things I do know is that we do let work move into our home space, and it keeps me up in the middle of the night. So I got to get better at that. And if any of you listeners are out there and have some ideas and yes, I already do practice yoga and healthy. Kristina Supler: mindfulness, Susan Stone: I've got that mindfulness.But you know what's been coming in a lot and I just thought we talk about it. We're getting a lot of calls about bullying again. Kristina Supler: We are. And we get those cases and those calls, I should say, all the time. I mean, every year. But I do feel like in January there's always a bit of an uptick in bullying, say, issues. And it's really for students of all ages, wouldn't you agree? Susan Stone: Yeah. I wonder if you think it has anything to do with the crappy weather. Kristina Supler: I hadn't thought of that. maybe we're in Cleveland and it was like literally zero a couple of weeks ago, and no one's outside moving around. Everyone's cooped up in homes. That could be a thought. Susan Stone: Yeah, it could be. But so the questions that come in is, if your child's accused of being the bully, how can you help defend my child? If your kid is bullied, what can I do? How do I stop it? Do have a lawsuit? There's a lot of issues related that you would call an attorney for if your child's involved in bullying. Kristina Supler: Yeah, I mean, and I think that so often in these initial meetings when we're meeting with parents and children alike, you know, one of the first questions we get is, should I sent my kid to school tomorrow? Should I put my kid out of the school? And it's like, okay, we got to deal with this one step at a time. We got a lot to unpack here, but you know, there's not a one size fits all answer. I would say in any of the cases. Susan Stone: I have a personal question. Were you ever bullied? Kristina Supler: Wow. Susan Stone: did I touch a personal nerve Kristina Supler: or was I a bully Susan Stone: or were you the bully? Yeah, Kristina Supler: I sincere bully believe I was not a bully. Susan Stone: Everybody thinks there not the bully Kristina Supler: will be someone out there who feels who feels otherwise. Who, you know, I ran with in fifth grade, but I. I don't think I was. But, you know, Susan Stone: We’ll find out Kristina Supler: The universe has a way of telling us these things, right? Susan Stone: wow. We're going to get an email from someone to you sure hear about you bullied me in the fifth grade. Kristina Supler: I this does remind me. I had it's funny, I was saying fifth grade. I had a personal variance that that that deeply scarred me and is still with me to this day. I still carry it with me Susan Stone: is it juicy. Kristina Supler: Well, I mean, at the time it was. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Susan Stone: Do share come on I want to know Kristina Supler: .I had a group of friends. Susan Stone: Were they friends or quote friends? Kristina Supler: Well, I mean, friends in the way that anyone's friends during adolescence that, you know, one day, one day you're the coolest kid in school and then the next day no one will talk to you for no reason, and you're not really sure why. But then 48 hours later, you're back on top. So I had a group of girlfriends who I did view as my friends. I thought we were true friends. Now, in hindsight, you know, what was the quality of the relationship? That's something I would like to have Susan Stone: Are you still friends with them now. Kristina Supler: No, Susan Stone: okay, then they weren't friends. Kristina Supler: Yeah, no, no contact. Having contact since, I don't know, 30 years ago. But there there was a boy I had a crush on and my friends convinced the boy to ask me out. Susan Stone: Now, what The first of all was the boy's name. Come on, Dish. Kristina Supler: The boy's name was Brad. Susan Stone: Okay, So did Brad actually in fifth grade ask you out to pizza or what did that even mean? At that age Kristina Supler: That ended well, that's it. Yeah. What? What did it mean? I'm still asking myself that, but I assure you, it was very significant at the time. We were. We were boyfriend girlfriend. I don't know. Like, we didn't we didn't go anywhere. We didn't meet in public. We this was obviously pre cell phones and social media. So I supposed dating someone was like an eight minute phone call at 7 p.m. before your parents needed the phone because this was also before you know, people have like multiple lines in their house. And I was like, listen, my house. We were all sharing one phone. Susan Stone: And so multiple lines in the stone house, I assure you no Kristina Supler: it it's hot, hot competition in my house to get on the phone in the evening. So at any rate, I liked this boy Brad. And one day out of nowhere, he realized that he, too, like me, wanted me to be his girlfriend. Susan Stone: So this is not a sad story. This is awesome. Kristina Supler: but wait, there's more. So I am just over the moon thinking, you know, I'm like, Wow, this is. Susan Stone: It's Brad. Brad. Kristina Supler: Well, you'll always have or not. Fast forward, I don't know if it was two days later, three days later, I don't know a certain period of time passed and I'm in gym class and I find out that Brad Shortbread asked me out, but it was really like on a dare or like it was in concerted effort with these like, plans with my friends. And really it was just to humiliate me. And of course, I found all of this out. And I mean, girl, I was crying hysterically. I ran out of gym class. I was crushed because the humiliation and the worst part about it wasn't just okay, it was joke. Brad doesn't like me. Like, okay, you know, the betrayal. The betrayal that I everyone else had this joke. I was on the outside. Everyone else knew what was going on. They were talking about me and I wasn't, you know, it was just. Yeah, the betrayal, the devastation, the pain. Susan Stone: Did you go to school the next day? Kristina Supler: Girl? Are you kidding me? My parents were like, you know, get over it go back to school. You’re fine Susan Stone: That was my parents. For sure Kristina Supler: There is no cadwelding you know, let's talk about this. How does that make you feel that? No, no, none of that. Susan Stone: Yeah, I didn't have that either. Kristina Supler: Catholic grade school. So, you know, back in the day, Catholic grade school. I mean, I will
