Revealing Voices

Tony Roberts and co-hosts - Authors, Mental Health Advocates, and Ministry Developers
Revealing Voices

A faith-based, peer-led, story-driven, stigma-breaking mental health podcast that explores the question, “What does healing mean to you?”

  1. FEB 7

    HAIKAST XX – Four Cries

    I’m thankful for tears.  As I grow older, I find that the poignant times that often precede emotional moments are actually a mix of joy and sorrow.  I have also noticed tears arise in moments of intense gratitude - times when I am thankful for unexpected blessings that seem beyond what I deserve or could imagine. 2022 was definitely a year of more crying than normal.  The most outstanding of these experiences was over Labor Day and involved 3 straight days of tears.My son, Isaac, attended a spiritual retreat called Chrysalis over Labor Day weekend. About 15 years prior, I volunteered at the same 3-night ecumenical experience. The site is still at the same Brown Country deeply forested remote location. Taking Isaac to the retreat was one of those drives that helped me recall many memories that are hard to access unless I’m back in the same space. They were very good memories of helping others experience the meaning of sacrifice, love, and reconciliation.Doing a deep dive into an intensive weekend of self reflection and self discovery with mostly strangers is not necessarily a teenager’s idea of a fun weekend. Like many teenagers, my son had a fair share of ups and downs throughout his childhood. Most notably, he endured the divorce of his mother and me - something that undoubtedly had a spiritual impact on him beyond my comprehension. Spiritual retreats tend to surface a lot of mixed emotions and is often the reason - whether conscious or unconscious - why people decide to not take the risk. Isaac was reluctant to commit to the long weekend, so I shared my personal experience of Chrysalis with him. We talked about the speakers over the weekend who would be sharing intimate spiritual experiences. We talked about the delicate discernment required to appreciate others’ spirituality while also questioning some of the divergent religious beliefs that may be held by those speakers. We talked about honoring the many ways that people are moved spiritually and to not judge others' expressions of faith. I emphasized my spiritual belief that Christianity is, at its core, the cultivation and sharing of “agape” love - a concept that the weekend would help bring into sharp focus for him.What is agape love?  I think of it as acts of appreciation, encouragement, and service that are done without expectation of reciprocation. In daily life, it is easy to get caught in a cycle of transactional behavior. There is nothing wrong with this part of human culture, but to settle on transactions as being the basis for cultural meaning misses out on both giving and receiving in a way more aligned with agape love. This is different from romantic love. It is not intuitive or easy to learn unless intentionally taught and experienced. That is a big reason why the Chrysalis weekend is so important - it is a sort of crash course on how to better love others and - almost always - understanding how to better love yourself.In 2004, when I went on a similar retreat designed for adults, I attentively listened to messages about forgiveness and reconciliation. The times of prayer and reflection over the weekend allowed these life changing concepts to transform how I approached my relationships. I realized how much pain I held by not forgiving my father for the endless fights we had when I was a teenager. I’ll never forget telling my dad that I was sorry for how I had treated him in high school and college. His response reminded me of the prodigal son parable as he embraced me and gladly accepted my apology - making a point to say that he had forgiven me a long time ago. I remembered this experience and other blessings born of forgiveness as Isaac was welcomed into the retreat center. It was a drenching rain as adults gathered to pray for the teenagers we referred to as “caterpillars” on the Chrysalis retreat. How would they change over the weekend? A few tears of gratitude percolated as I prayed.The next day, I was gardening in the sunshine at one of my favorite n...

    7 min
  2. JAN 16

    HAIKAST XIX – Lookout

    People of a certain age likely have a vessel of pictures. To be clear, I’m not talking about a well curated photo album. For me, the vessel is a cheap plastic bin, about 8” W x 15” L x 4” D. Full of pictures. Many of them loosely organized in the original paper envelopes that they gave me at Target or Walmart or the drug store where the film was processed. Many of them are labeled: Summer 2005, Christmas 2003, Nela Baby Photos, STL trip 2004, etc. It’s not a great organization system, but its full of serendipity. If there is any thought of hunting through them for a picture, I might as well go through the entire bin. Probably over a thousand photos piled high. A few often slip to the floor as I reach for them.Recently, I read the book “American Gods” by Neil Gaiman. The small g variety. It’s a roadtrip romp through the Midwest. The main character is a recently released prisoner who, unbeknownst to him, makes a deal to be the bodyguard of the Norse god, Odin. It’s a fun book. Emotive at times. I really liked the main character’s love for his wife, who died days before he is released from prison and haunts him (in a good way) through the rest of the book. At the climax, there is a showdown between the old gods, mostly immigrants from ancient lands who couldn’t quite make it in America and the new American gods (think Santa Claus), who capture our imagination and usurp our more deeply held spiritual wishes in accordance with cultural convenience. It is the kind of book that makes me ask questions like, “Does Jesus actually stack up to Santa Claus most Decembers?” and “What do Americans worship without knowing they are doing so?”The site of the book’s final battle is Lookout Mountain near Chattanooga, TN. In real American history, the mountain has special significance as a sacred site of native American culture, an important Civil War strategic location, and - in contemporary times - as a tourist destination known for its extravagant gnome displays. It now captures people’s interest with the unique style of advertising that you see painted on old barns on rural highways: “You’re Almost There - Lookout Mountain!” You might call it a tourist trap. The author calls it a “thin place” where the geography, topography, and natural beauty of the place have attracted millions of people for many reasons over the centuries.In the author’s world, a thin place is a location where gods gather because it is where people have historically gathered. These places hold significance that is mutable, where a constant battle for meaning shapes peoples’ perceptions and experiences. Is the mountain a site of worship, military strategy, or commercialism? It can be all of these things and more. Ultimately, that meaning does not have to be culturally defined. It can be highly individualized and your own belief significantly influences the experience. In my own belief system, I worship a God who created the earth as a bountiful garden for all to share. This belief often leads me to natural areas in honor of the sublime beauty that no human hand will ever be able to create.In the Cherokee language, Chattanooga is translated as “rock coming to a point” or “end of the mountain.” On top of Lookout Mountain, as modern tourism marketing goes, you can see seven states. It is a visionary place. I wonder, before there were states, how did Indigenous people describe what could be seen from that point? On what occasions did people gather at the “end of the mountain?”In summer of 2007, I was preparing to go to graduate school to get an MBA from Indiana University. This was a major life altering moment for me. The week before school started, I went with my wife and two young children to Athens, GA to visit family. On the way back, we stopped in Chattanooga. At the hotel, I distinctly remember my fearless 18 month old son taking a dive into the water at the kiddie pool and my daughter being enthralled by the massive miniature train exhibit.

    10 min
  3. 11/09/2024

    Episode 71 – Radical Acceptance with Kimberly Hoffman

    Kimberly Hoffman was diagnosed with ME/Chronic Fatigue Syndrome over 30 years ago and then with fibromyalgia 12 years ago. She works full time at Cummins Inc. in the New and Recon Parts Department as an Inside Sales Administrator and with the Disability Inclusion employee resource group. She is a writer and editor for the Disability Inclusion newsletter, advocating, educating and allying with others on the subject of disability inclusion. Kimberly is also a children’s author of nine books with topics such as overcoming obstacles, dealing with big emotions, self-worth and diversity. She is a spinner of amazing tales that influence young minds to think deeply, reframing their impossibilities to reach their possibilities. She creates unique and innovative programming to engage any size of audience, from preschool to seniors, motivating, encouraging, and challenging them to think outside the box on a variety of topics.Kimberly resides in her hometown of Columbus, Indiana where she is also the vice president of the Friends of the Library board. She loves being creative through writing, dancing, acting, and making jewelry. She is married to Paul Hoffman, an author and publisher. Together, they have six children, one grandchild and many grand-fur and -feather babies.Be sure to find Kimberly on Facebook – Kimberly S. Hoffman – Author, Instagram @kimberlyhoffman_author or at her website – kimberlyhoffmanblog.wordpress.com. She can also be reached at khoffmanauthor@gmail.com.

    48 min
  4. 10/09/2024

    HAIKAST XVIII – Fresh Start

    I dedicate this podcast to Robert Pulley who has inspired multiple generations of artists in Columbus and beyond as an Arts teacher at Columbus North High School and as a professional sculptor. Mr. Pulley’s work has been featured for over a year in front of the Fresh Start Recovery Center, the building that is the subject of this Haikast. Thank you, Mr. Pulley, for the generous sharing of your craft. It’s a delight to garden around your sculpture. To learn more about Robert Pulley’s work, visit www.robertpulley.com. (NOTE: The photo accompanying this episode includes the Fresh Start sculpture)Downtown Columbus does not have much greenspace. While there is Mill Race Park on the west side - hugging the river - it is literally across the tracks from downtown. Washington Street, the main street through the heart of downtown, lacks landscaped areas. The most notable flora are the callery pear trees lining the sidewalks for 7 blocks. They are celebrated for their rapid growth and abundant white blooms in early spring. Unfortunately, they smell bad while flowering, drop abundant mushy berries on cars and sidewalks in fall, easily break, and are short lived. And worse, they are an invasive tree species that easily spread to dominate public lands and poorly maintained properties. Being a native plant advocate, it was a dream of mine to find a place in downtown Columbus to feature a different landscape aesthetic. When approached by Landmark Columbus Foundation in 2020 to do just that, I jumped at the opportunity to write a grant to turn one of the only green spaces downtown into a native plant landscape.The property is at the corner of 7th and Washington, near the north end of the most heavily trafficked section of downtown. It hosts an old limestone building, over a century old, that was originally the post office. There have been many owners and uses over the years. Most recently, it was converted into the Fresh Start Recovery Center, owned by Volunteers of America, to support women recovering from opioid and other drug addictions. Pregnant women and mothers, along with their young children, are welcome for long term housing as they work towards sobriety.When I approached staff at Fresh Start, the supervisor immediately had the vision of the project providing opportunities for horticulture therapy for the women staying at the shelter. So after signing a Memorandum of Understanding, acquiring grants, hiring a landscape architect, renting a sod cutter, purchasing plants, and recruiting volunteers, we were ready to transform the turf grass surrounding the beautiful building. On the United Way Day of Caring in May 2021, a TV crew showed up, the volunteers poured in, and the installation was installed within 8 hours. Now butterfly weed, coreopsis, New Jersey tea, spicebush, blue mistflower, columbine, prairie dropseed, and other native plants are thriving.Native landscapes, while they may appear intimidating to maintain, are actually relatively easy to manage. Native plants have evolved to our local environment over thousands of years, and are an important part of healthy local habitats. In their native region, they are the most sustainable plants, growing deep roots and rarely requiring extra water or fertilizer. And almost all native plants are perennial, meaning that you don’t have to plant them over and over each year by seed or with plugs purchased from a store. After they are established, the primary maintenance is pruning when they get a bit unwieldy and adding mulch to suppress unwanted weeds.Around the time of the original planting, I helped host a documentary of a film called “5 Seasons” about the landscape architect, Piet Oudolf. He is most well known for the High Line trail in New York City and the Lurie Gardens at Millennium Park in Chicago. Piet is credited for starting the “New Perennial Movement,” focusing on the structure of plants throughout the year - appreciating not just the color of flowers,

    9 min
  5. 09/02/2024

    HAIKAST XVII – Mental Health at Work

    After 7 years, I walked away from my longest held job on Valentine’s Day 2023.I started at COSCO in January 2016 as a temporary worker. COSCO, whose name is a sort of acronym for Columbus Specialty Company, began in Columbus, IN over 80 years ago. To be clear, I do not work at Costco, the popular club store started on the west coast, known for being a slightly elevated version of Sam’s Club.If you know COSCO, it is likely as a manufacturer of folding tables and chairs or, more recently, as the creator of a very impressive hand truck that you can buy at …. Wait for it…. Costco!So how did I, a proud Indiana University alum from the Kelley School of Business MBA program, start out as a temporary employee?In the summer of 2007, I started my first year in the MBA program as a married man with 2 kids, 5 years of banking management under my belt, a homeowner, and a leader of the youth group at my church. I received a scholarship and can still remember reading in my acceptance speech that I was prepared to manage my priorities of “family, church, and school” with an emphasis on that order. By the end of the first semester, I had spent most of the 4 months in an insomniac stupor, fueled by uncontrollable anxiety, resulting in a debilitating suicidal depression. The unexpected fall into the nadir of my life included spending Thanksgiving break at the Mental Health Unit of our local hospital, separating from my wife, moving into my parents’ house, taking a leave of absence from the MBA program, and nearly losing my faith.  I was divorced 9 short months after the first day of class. It was an absolute tragedy.By the time I started at COSCO, 8 years had passed.During that intervening period, I had some significant accomplishments - writing a book about a major flood disaster in my hometown called “Watershed: Service in the Wake of Disaster,” marrying the beautiful Jennifer Anne Johnston, remaining a loving and engaged father of my 2 children, finishing the MBA degree through the IU evening program, and joining a church where I met a great group of new friends.What did not happen during those 8 years was a significant stride in career growth. I held down a full time job as a care partner at the hospital for 3.5 years, a year stint as an assistant manager at Walmart, a 3 year full time contract job as a grant writer at a local youth serving organization, and a 1 year temp job at Cummins in their HR department. I had yet to earn a salary that exceeded what I earned at the bank before I started as an MBA student.The stress of not keeping up with my friend’s career trajectories, not living up to the potential after being a straight A student throughout my life, and failing to make progress after completing my MBA were all crushing to my self esteem. I had two more stress unit visits during this time and lived long stretches with severe depression.… And then I started as a temp worker at COSCO, helping out as a part time Administrative Assistant, committed to finding a way to be optimistic and gain full time employment.  A few months later, I was offered a full time job and over the years had multiple promotions until ascending to the Marketing Manager of the furniture department in 2022. Who could resist the new “Trusted Solutions” marketing slogan of the COSCO tables and chairs!?Something else had happened over those seven years with the company - I rekindled my professional self-esteem, found a deep passion for environmental work in the community, and started a weekly mental health recovery group at my church.I became a member of The Stability Network, a national organization with a vision for “People experiencing mental health challenges to thrive in supportive workplaces and communities.” To join, I needed to publicly recognize my mental health diagnosis on their website, attend mental health advocacy training, and be willing to share my mental health diagnosis in the workplace. I attended retreats in New York City and San Francisco with...

    11 min
5
out of 5
29 Ratings

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A faith-based, peer-led, story-driven, stigma-breaking mental health podcast that explores the question, “What does healing mean to you?”

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