Sex Therapy 101 with Cami Hurst

Dr. Cami Hurst
Sex Therapy 101 with Cami Hurst

Welcome to Sex Therapy 101 with your host Cami Hurst. This is the sexiest podcast in the west for all the right reasons. Cami sits down with amazing experts in the field of sexual health and counseling to learn, converse and add her own expert voice to the conversation. Cuddle up with your partner and get ready to have your love life feel more complete.

  1. 6D AGO

    Beyond "Duty Sex": Betty Martin's Revolutionary Framework

    What if the problem isn't that you don't want sex, but that the sex you're having isn't worth wanting? This revolutionary perspective from Dr. Betty Martin, creator of the Wheel of Consent framework, challenges everything we've been taught about sexual desire. In this illuminating conversation, Betty explains why many women find themselves caught in a pattern of consenting to unwanted sex, leading to resentment and even trauma symptoms over time. She reveals how cultural conditioning teaches women "to be wanted, not to want" while simultaneously disconnecting men from their own sensuality and emotional lives. The result? A widespread sexual dynamic where "he thinks he's serving and she thinks she's allowing" - with neither partner getting what they truly desire. Betty unpacks how our earliest experiences teach us that touch is something that happens to us without our consent, setting the stage for passive relationships with physical intimacy. She challenges the limiting "gatekeeper model" of consent and offers a more expansive framework where both partners explore what they genuinely want to give and receive. Most powerfully, she reframes sexual dissatisfaction not as a disorder but as valuable information. If you don't want the sex available to you, "it's actually a good sign that you don't want it" - your body is telling you something important! Through her Three Minute Game and other practices, Betty shows how couples can discover new forms of pleasurable connection that move beyond our cultural scripts about sex. Betty Martin has had her hands on people professionally for over 40 years, first as a Chiropractor and upon retiring from that practice, as a certified Surrogate Partner, Sacred Intimate, and Somatic Sex Educator. Her explorations in somatic-based therapy and practices informed her creation of the framework, The Wheel of Consent®. You can find out more at www.bettymartin.org

    50 min
  2. JUN 19

    Untangling Duty Sex with Dr. Tina Schermer Sellers

    What happens when women repeatedly consent to sex they don't want? Dr. Tina Schermer Sellers, founder of the Northwest Institute on Intimacy and author of "Sex, God and the Conservative Church," joins us to explore this question with unexpected depth and historical context. This conversation takes a fascinating turn as Dr. Tina traces how patriarchy, politics, and religious messaging converged to create a profound disconnect between women and their sexual agency. She reveals how the rise of the religious right in the late 1970s wasn't just about faith but part of a calculated political strategy that fundamentally changed how Americans view sexuality. While abstinence-only education created "a vacuum of actual knowledge," media deregulation flooded culture with harmful messaging about gender and sex. Dr. Tina Schermer Sellers is a licensed sex and gender feminist psychotherapist, best-selling author, researcher, emeriti professor, and media personality whose expertise spans sex therapy, spiritual intimacy, parenting, medicine, and social justice.  Her revolutionary perspectives have been expressed on platforms such as Spirituality & Health, Refinery 29, Vocal, Medium, and Bust Magazines, along with many podcast, radio, news, and TV outlets. Known for exposing the impact of patriarchy and sexual shame on our ability to securely attach to our partners, and instruct our children to attach to theirs, Dr. Sellers’ book Sex, God, & the Conservative Church – Erasing Shame from Sexual Intimacy has had a global impact. Her latest book, Shameless Parenting – Everything You Need to Raise Shame-free, Confident, Kids and Heal Your Shame Too! was a New Release Bestseller in eight categories. She speaks throughout the world on how to heal, and how to raise shame-free relationally confident children. In 2015, Dr. Sellers founded the Northwest Institute on Intimacy, a post-graduate institute to train psychotherapists, educators, clergy, and physicians in sexual health, healing sexual shame and trauma, and understanding their sexual biases.  In 2023, Dr. Tina founded InannaRising.org - A private membership community for psychedelic assisted therapists and medical providers to get ongoing clinical consultation, collaboration, training, and support in creating scholarships for the under resourced, and participation in an indigenous reparation fund. Dr. Tina can be followed on Instagram @DrTinaShameless. At Facebook  facebook.com/TinaSSellers  Online at www.TinaSchermerSellers.com

    1h 10m
  3. MAY 22

    A Conversation with Al Vernacchio

    We dive into the complex world of "consenting to unwanted sex" with Al Vernacchio, a comprehensive sex educator who brings unique insights from his position at a Quaker school. Our conversation explores why many women agree to sex they don't desire and the cultural influences that create these situations. Al Vernacchio, MSEd teaches at Friends' Central School in Wynnewood, PA. He is the Coordinator of Gender, Sexuality, and Consent Education, a Senior Staff member in the department of Institutional Diversity, Equity, and Justice, and is also a member of the Upper School English department.  Al is forthright, funny, and compassionate as he supports students, school communities, and families to develop healthy sexuality in young people of all ages. A nationally recognized expert in human sexuality education for over 30 years, Al has lectured, published articles, and offered workshops throughout the country. His work has been featured in “Teaching Good Sex”, a November 20, 2011 cover story in The New York Times Magazine. Al has given four TED Talks, and has appeared on national programs such as NPR’s “Morning Edition”, “1A”, and “Radio Times”. He is the author of For Goodness Sex: A Sex-Positive Guide to Raising Healthy, Empowered Teens published in a revised and expanded edition in April, 2023. Al earned his BA in Theology from St. Joseph's University and his MSEd in Human Sexuality Education from the University of Pennsylvania.

    51 min
  4. SEASON 4, EPISODE 1 TRAILER

    Introducing: Consenting to Unwanted Sex

    What happens when women repeatedly say "yes" to sex they don't actually want? The answer might surprise—and disturb—you. Dr. Cami Hurst pulls back the curtain on her groundbreaking PhD research examining the hidden consequences of "duty sex" in long-term relationships. Drawing from over 1,300 women's experiences, she reveals striking findings that challenge our understanding of consent and sexual health. Most disturbingly, 53% of women who consented to unwanted sex with their partners developed moderate to high PTSD-like symptoms, despite no history of sexual assault or physical coercion. These women reported significant emotional distress, relationship strain, and sexual aversion that compounded over time. One participant captured this perfectly: "The cycle of duty sex and resentment has killed any kind of emotional intimacy in our relationship." The research illuminates a troubling reality—that unrecognized verbal and emotional coercion permeates many bedrooms, with 82% of participants experiencing pressure after initially refusing sex. As one woman put it, "He was never coercive, only pouty and mad at me. It was easier to consent than to deal with his emotions." This episode serves as an introduction to an upcoming series featuring diverse cultural experts exploring how different communities experience this phenomenon. Dr. Hurst aims to expand beyond her homogeneous sample to understand how cultural factors may contribute to or protect against these patterns. Whether you're struggling with sexual desire discrepancies in your own relationship, working as a therapist with couples facing intimacy issues, or simply interested in relationship dynamics, this research provides crucial insights into why consent alone isn't enough. Share your experiences or thoughts by emailing cami@camhurst.com, and join us as we explore this important conversation over the coming year.

    19 min

Trailer

4.8
out of 5
36 Ratings

About

Welcome to Sex Therapy 101 with your host Cami Hurst. This is the sexiest podcast in the west for all the right reasons. Cami sits down with amazing experts in the field of sexual health and counseling to learn, converse and add her own expert voice to the conversation. Cuddle up with your partner and get ready to have your love life feel more complete.

You Might Also Like

To listen to explicit episodes, sign in.

Stay up to date with this show

Sign in or sign up to follow shows, save episodes, and get the latest updates.

Select a country or region

Africa, Middle East, and India

Asia Pacific

Europe

Latin America and the Caribbean

The United States and Canada