55 episodes

This weekly show pairs two mismatched women discussing relationship and sex topics we all typically whisper about. Laugh-out-loud funny, irreverent, British, international sex expert and author of 17 books Tracey Cox answers questions from the "audience" posed by the squeamish, mom of four, award-winning literary podcaster Zibby Owens, who blushes often.

Tracey answers three questions each episode like:
How much should I really share with my girlfriends?
What do I do about my husband's work wife?
How often should we really be getting it on?!

Have your own questions?! Enter them anonymously at www.zibbyowens.com/sex.

SexTok with Zibby and Tracey Zibby Owens and Tracey Cox

    • Health & Fitness
    • 4.7 • 34 Ratings

This weekly show pairs two mismatched women discussing relationship and sex topics we all typically whisper about. Laugh-out-loud funny, irreverent, British, international sex expert and author of 17 books Tracey Cox answers questions from the "audience" posed by the squeamish, mom of four, award-winning literary podcaster Zibby Owens, who blushes often.

Tracey answers three questions each episode like:
How much should I really share with my girlfriends?
What do I do about my husband's work wife?
How often should we really be getting it on?!

Have your own questions?! Enter them anonymously at www.zibbyowens.com/sex.

    S2 Ep. 17: Erections that Come and Go, Tricks for Having Great Sex Long-Distance, and How to Get Back on the Horse after Years of Being Single

    S2 Ep. 17: Erections that Come and Go, Tricks for Having Great Sex Long-Distance, and How to Get Back on the Horse after Years of Being Single

    In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions:
    1) I’ve just started a new relationship with a guy I’m really into. Our sex is good and he seems to enjoy it but his erections are a little hit and miss. On two occasions, he struggled to get one and I notice he loses his erection when he goes down on me. Does that mean he’s not enjoying doing it? Do you think it means he’s not that into me sexually or he doesn’t find me attractive? We’re both in our 20s so shouldn’t his erection be really hard?
    2) My husband is leaving for a work training course for 10 weeks. We will be able to talk and video chat on the phone but won’t see each other in person until his training is done. We’ve been together for 19 years and have never been apart for this long. We enjoy having sex 3-4 times a week and we are both going to miss it while he’s gone. Neither of us have ever had phone or video sex so any tips or ideas to spice things up from afar are much appreciated.
    3) I haven't had a sexual partner for many years for various reasons (early menopause, kids etc). I would love to have a man in my life but don't even know where to start. I'm taking HRT so my libido is back with a vengeance, but I don't know where to find a partner. I also feel like a partner will expect me to know so much more than I do. I feel like a sexual novice and this is affecting my confidence. I’m 42.
     And offers her sex tip of the week!
    Purchase SexTok with Zibby and Tracey merch here: https://www.bonfire.com/store/zibby-owens/
    To have Tracey answer YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU
    Tracey writes a column summarizing the main points of each episode on Medium. Read it at https://bit.ly/3MhkxN4
    Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!


    See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    • 29 min
    S2 Ep. 16: My Husband Only Wants Anal Sex, My partner Was a Virgin, and Is It The Kiss of Death if We Sleep in Separate Beds?

    S2 Ep. 16: My Husband Only Wants Anal Sex, My partner Was a Virgin, and Is It The Kiss of Death if We Sleep in Separate Beds?

    In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions:
    1) When my husband and I met in our early 40’s, we had a lot of sex that was fairly vanilla but very passionate. Over time, the frequency has decreased. I don’t like being the initiator so there’s not been much I can do to have sex more other than be incredibly enthusiastic when he does want it. The problem is that, over time, he’s become more interested in anal sex than vaginal sex. Having things put in my butt does not arouse me at all, but now it seems to be all he wants and all he can get off on. I wonder if he’s watching tons of anal porn and this has somehow taken over his erotic life. I don’t want to discourage sex or demand he desires things he doesn’t, but I desperately miss regular sex. How can I get him interested again?
    2) My husband and I have been together for over 20 years and recently we have been in a bit of a slump. He was a virgin before he met me and I was not. He recently told me that he is a bit envious that I had experience before we got together. He only said it to me once but I worry that he feels that he's missed out. How can I help him through this?  I trust him and know that cheating is not an issue.
    3) Sadly for my wife, I’ve started to snore as I age. This means she has badly disturbed nights. We are lucky, we have a solution: a spare room. I do sleep there every now and then to give her a break. But my snoring is so bad, I fear I might have to move into the spare room permanently. If I do this, is it the start of a slippery slope? Might our really great relationship start to suffer? We have a good sex life, usually enjoying it in the mornings, so I can readily slip back into the marital bed for a romp, or even invite my wife round to mine. Do you think it’s a problem?
     And offers her sex tip of the week!
    Purchase SexTok with Zibby and Tracey merch here: https://www.bonfire.com/store/zibby-owens/
    To have Tracey answer YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU
    Tracey writes a column summarizing the main points of each episode on Medium. Read it at https://bit.ly/3MhkxN4
    Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!


    See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    • 24 min
    S2 Ep. 15: Sex with a Much Older Man, Nipple-Biting, and Why has a Death Made Me Horny?

    S2 Ep. 15: Sex with a Much Older Man, Nipple-Biting, and Why has a Death Made Me Horny?

    In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions:
    1) I’m a 35-year-old woman who has fallen in love with a much older man: he’s 60. At the moment, the age difference isn’t that apparent because he looks and acts much younger than his years. But I am worried about sex because it’s a big part of our relationship. How long can a man keep getting erections? Is there an age when he will stop wanting to have sex with me?
    2) I’ve been with my wife for 25 years, and recently she asked me - no, TOLD me - to bite her nipples, HARD. I did, and she kept saying to bite harder. I was afraid of breaking the skin. How common is this? Why has it never come up before? I sort of understand, because there have been times when I have wanted her to squeeze my testicles, and probably with a lot more force than one might think would be comfortable. Is this the same phenomena, sort of?
    
    3) My mother died suddenly a few months ago and for some reason, it’s reignited my very lazy sex drive. I’ve gone from trying to avoid sex to trying to have it as much as I possibly can. I felt terrible at first - like it was disrespectful. But it was the only time I could escape the awful feeling of loss and grief. Is this normal? Does it happen to other people, too?
     And offers her sex tip of the week!
    To have Tracey answer YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU
    Tracey writes a column summarizing the main points of each episode on Medium. Read it at https://bit.ly/3MhkxN4
    Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

    See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    • 27 min
    S2 Ep. 14: Cross-Dressing, Jealous Rages, and How to Make Sex Work When You’re Different Heights

    S2 Ep. 14: Cross-Dressing, Jealous Rages, and How to Make Sex Work When You’re Different Heights

    In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions:
    1) I am a happily married man who likes wearing women’s underwear under my clothes. I buy the items secretly and my wife has no idea I do this: it’s remarkably easy to get away with if you think things through. I’ve been doing this from when I was very small and never told anyone about it in my life. It doesn’t interfere with my relationships but I would dearly love not to have to hide it and to share this indulgence with my wife. I have two questions: would you consider this a fetish and should I tell her?
    2) Tracey, I am like you often describe yourself when you were younger – namely very jealous of everything. Real women, porn, fantasies, thoughts…I would like to control everything. It makes me (and all of my partners – including the one I am with now) go crazy. What can I do about it? I tried different kinds of psychotherapy but I am still going nuts, very often. How did you find your way out of this horror?
    
    3) My husband and I are very different heights. I am 5'5" and my husband is 6'5". We have been together for almost 25 years now and have had some ups and downs, but we have recently found each other again. We are both very adventurous during sex and really enjoy each other. We both would like to have him bend me over and take me or have sex standing up. The problem is our height. Even shower sex is out. The angle just isn't right and it becomes quite funny when we try. Do you have any ideas on how to solve these problems?
     And offers her sex tip of the week!
    To have Tracey answer YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU
    Tracey writes a column summarizing the main points of each episode on Medium. Read it at https://bit.ly/3MhkxN4
    Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

    See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    • 33 min
    S2 Ep. 13: Sex Giggles, Sex Dreams, and How to Tell if Your Boyfriend is Secretly Gay

    S2 Ep. 13: Sex Giggles, Sex Dreams, and How to Tell if Your Boyfriend is Secretly Gay

    In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions:
    1) Sometimes when I’m in bed with my husband, I start laughing. He gets all huffy about it which makes me laugh even more. I have no idea why I do it or how to stop.
    2) I’m very happy with my partner of 12 years but I dream of sex with other men nearly every night. I love the dreams: they’re exciting and fun though I do feel guilty when I wake up. I sometimes wonder if this means I’d be up for cheating if someone made a move on me. I’m in my mid 40s and don’t get hit on very often. The dreams make me not trust myself: I’d like to think I’d say no, but would I?  
    
    3) Can you tell if a man is secretly gay or has bisexual tendencies? I have met a man I’m really into, but my instincts tell me something is wrong. He is curiously uninterested in having sex – especially since our relationship is new. I am always the instigator. When we do have sex, he won’t make eye contact and he cuts straight to intercourse. He doesn’t enjoy foreplay at all: there’s no interest in my breasts, he never fingers me and says he doesn’t like performing oral sex. Out of bed, he’s great and very affectionate. Though, now I think about it, he’s not into deep kissing either. Otherwise, he’s a great boyfriend and I’d like us to get serious. Am I being over paranoid? Should I ask him outright?
     And offers her sex tip of the week!
    To have Tracey answer YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU
    Tracey writes a column summarizing the main points of each episode on Medium. Read it at https://bit.ly/3MhkxN4
    Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

    See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    • 21 min
    S2 Ep. 12: My Partner Won't Listen to What I Want in Bed, my Boyfriend's Still on Tinder, and Is There Really Such a Thing as an Aphrodisiac?

    S2 Ep. 12: My Partner Won't Listen to What I Want in Bed, my Boyfriend's Still on Tinder, and Is There Really Such a Thing as an Aphrodisiac?

    In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions:
    1) Is there such a thing as an aphrodisiac? Oysters, chocolate, things like that? I suspect the answer is no but I’m curious if things like ‘Spanish Fly’ ever did work?
    2) I have no problems asking for what I want in bed but I feel like I’m talking to myself with my new partner. It’s not easy for me to orgasm because I need very specific stimulation. (I’m a gay man, by the way, so it’s not true that all men can orgasm without issues.) I’ve explained what I need done to my boyfriend many, many times yet he still doesn’t do it. What do I do now?
    
    3) I met my partner on Tinder and, once I decided I really liked him, took myself off all the dating apps. I thought he had done the same and got a shock when I looked to see he’s still on there and was active recently. We’ve been seeing each other a month and it’s really full on. What does this mean and how do I deal with it?
     And offers her sex tip of the week!
    To have Tracey answer YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelU
    Tracey writes a column summarizing the main points of each episode on Medium. Read it at https://bit.ly/3MhkxN4
    Want a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

    See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    • 23 min

Customer Reviews

4.7 out of 5
34 Ratings

34 Ratings

sylvia7love ,

Yes finally!

I absolutely love this podcast! The realness of sex is much needed. I find this podcast so useful with my sex life and understanding my feminine body. I love to keep it interesting so keep the episodes cumming 😆!!!

Jac's Driving Sanity ,

Great premise; poor delivery

This would be a wonderful show but Zibby is SO embarrassed about sex, bodies and intimacy. It is very annoying to have her be embarrassed about everything. She constantly reminds the listener that these are not her questions, that she’s not the “you” being talked to and she can’t even read some
of the questions.
I can’t believe this woman has four kids. Adopted? Turn off all the lights every time? Just unzip and use the slit in her pantaloons with her eyes closed?
Seriously. This lady needs therapy to get over her sexual repression.
On the other hand, she has a podcast about sex. Is this all affected for her show? If so, stop. You’re ruining your show.

Christina Hillsberg ,

Irreverent, fun, and informative!

I love this podcast so much and look forward to the episodes each week! The format is fantastic—short and sweet. I can throw in an AirPod while my kids are playing and listen while I’m making breakfast. If they only knew what I was listening to! ;) The dynamic of the much more reserved Zibby with the no nonsense, give-it-to-you-straight Tracey, is absolute perfection. And I love the sex tip at the end of each episode. Highly recommend!

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