Steven See It All Aaron Lynch, Hans Shriner, and Zachary Wiberg

What can I say about China Salesman? It's all in the title. You might ask yourself then, what do Steven Seagal and Mike Tyson, the front-runners on the poster, have to do with the China Salesman? Well the answer is easy. Nothing.
Here's an Imgur album for screenshots we reference.
Edited by Hans.
Follow us on Letterboxd! Aaron, Hans, and Zach
Disclaimer: We do not endorse Steven Seagal nor any of the heinous acts of which he is accused. We do not wish to boost his career, finances, or ego; we just aim to talk about his many very, very bad movies.

This episode may look slightly long but a full ten or eleven minutes of that runtime consist of a discussion surrounding Mad Max: Fury Road (2015). That discussion mostly just being Zach and Aaron shouting different Fury Road quotes at each other next to a vaguely bemused Hans.
This Cartels movie has it all: gunfights, interrogations, betrayals, comedy relief side characters. Is any of it good... well, not really, but it's all.
We're almost there. I can see the light at the end of this sewer pipe.
Edited by Zach.
Follow us on Letterboxd! Aaron, Hans, and Zach
Disclaimer: We do not endorse Steven Seagal nor any of the heinous acts of which he is accused. We do not wish to boost his career, finances, or ego; we just aim to talk about his many very, very bad movies.

Yeah, yeah, Seagal made a movie in which he plays a fascist and the movie somehow does not comment on fascism in any way. It's exactly as fun and interesting as Bladerunner would have been if it weren't directed by Ridley Scott and if the budget were $12. Most pressing, however, is discovering which of us is the podcast's Brad Pitt.
Edited by Aaron.
Follow us on Letterboxd! Aaron, Hans, and Zach
Music:
"Meatball Parade" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Disclaimer: We do not endorse Steven Seagal nor any of the heinous acts of which he is accused. We do not wish to boost his career, finances, or ego; we just aim to talk about his many very, very bad movies.

He's on a contract alright, but not to kill. Will that stop him from killing anyway? Definitely not. Does that ruin the whole plan? Absolutely. Is the whole experience as dull and boring as it is frustrating and infuriating? You betcha.
Here's an Imgur album for screenshots we reference.
Edited by Hans.
Follow us on Letterboxd! Aaron, Hans, and Zach
Disclaimer: We do not endorse Steven Seagal nor any of the heinous acts of which he is accused. We do not wish to boost his career, finances, or ego; we just aim to talk about his many very, very bad movies.

I'm gonna be 100% pure uncut completely honest with you; even after watching this movie and talking about it and listening to all of that again while editing the episode, at the time I'm writing these show notes I don't think I could tell you much of anything about this movie. It's that forgettable.
At least we had friend of the show Josh Rosa on as a guest to help flesh out the Steven See-It-All lore and set the record straight on a few important matters. That was a real hoot. Don't watch this movie.
Edited by Zach.
Follow us on Letterboxd! Aaron, Hans, and Zach (and maybe Josh some day)
Disclaimer: We do not endorse Steven Seagal nor any of the heinous acts of which he is accused. We do not wish to boost his career, finances, or ego; we just aim to talk about his many very, very bad movies.

In this week's episode we spend a little bit of time discussing, as Aaron puts it, "Bonnie and Clyde but BORING" and the rest of the time is either spent discussing other terrible movies or talking about Batman. Essentially a good overview of the quintessential American male interaction in the 21st century; for any future anthropologists who are listening.
Do we ever figure out what exactly it is that Asia is connecting? Your guess is as good as ours.
Edited by Zach.
Follow us on Letterboxd! Aaron, Hans, and Zach
Disclaimer: We do not endorse Steven Seagal nor any of the heinous acts of which he is accused. We do not wish to boost his career, finances, or ego; we just aim to talk about his many very, very bad movies.