The Mirror Challenge Sandra Pollock

This Monday I’m looking at what it means when we have the questions ‘Where am I going? What am I doing’ come up in our minds or when we feel lost in our life or about a particular thing so or situation.

What does it mean and how can I move forward from this point.

This video is taken from my Monday Tip of the week, which you can join live each Monday 10am on my Facebook page

 

 

 

Introduction

Hello, I am Sandra Pollock of Open Mind Coaching,

And this is the Mirror Challenge

I have been coaching people in life, career and business for over 20 years with clients in countries all over the world.



 

My passion is to help people become successful, overcome challenges and take the steps they want to, to achieve their dreams.

If you’ve listened to the first podcast of I’m stuck, you will recall that I said I would share some 15 additional tips over the next few podcasts.

In this session I will be continuing the focus on the topic, ‘I’m Stuck and covering tips on:



* Connect with yourself

* Don’t be afraid of you, and

* Learn to listen to yourself



So let’s get started.



* Connect with yourself



This may sound a little strange because most of us would think that we are already connected to ourselves and know who we are, but if you’re feeling stuck that is evidence that you’re not as connected to yourself as you really want to be.

One area in which we can learn to be better connected to ourselves is in understanding what your body needs when it needs it.  For example, when it needs rest and relaxation, sleep, food, etc.  Or in understanding what your mind and your emotions are telling.  Reading our emotional state, may not be something that we are encouraged to get to know in our busy society, but our emotions give us messages about what’s really happening and what we need to deal with.

We are usually trained to ignore these nature human messages.

When you’re feeling unloved by the world around, if could very well be a sign from your inner self to say, focus on loving yourself instead of loving for others to do that job for you.

In many cases when we’re seeing lack around us, it likely to be the very thing that we need and the best way to get something is to give it.

Being connected to yourself will enable you to learn, understand and accept what will make you happier within.



* Don’t Be Afraid of YOU



When we’re not used to hearing and trusting our own voice, we might feel a sense of apprehension at the thought of trust our own opinion and our own voice on many things.

A sense of fear may well be created when you find yourself wanted things or making decisions that are different from those of your parents, guardians or authority figures in your life and community.

It may even be that the things that you find that you like, are interested in doing and really want to do may be different from the role that spouse or partner might want you to fulfil.  So you may feel a sense of fear when you think that this might cause some degree of conflict between you and others.

This does not make you wrong nor does it make your wants and needs wrong.  You do have a right as a human being to your opinions and a right to want different things to those other people think you should want.

So don’t be afraid to explore your own wants, like and interests, even when these are not the same as others.  You may actually introduce others to something new that they may like.  An example of this is when I decided that I wanted to try horse riding.  My husband had always said he hated horses after having been kicked by a horse when he was a child.  Horsing riding was one of the things I’d put on my things to do by the end of the year a few years ago, so I was determined to do this.

In a wish not to be outdone by me, my husband decided he would join me and had to admit at the end of the riding session that he had thoroughly enjoyed it.  Had it not been for me pursuing my own interest he would not have had such a great experience and have a different view of horses.

 

 

 

 

 

I’m Stuck and I Don’t know What I Want to Be or Do

That heading or something quite close to it is a complaint I hear quite often.  People say this because they are unsure about what they should be doing, and when they don’t ve even know where they should start.  So I thought I would share a few tips on how you can get started and move away from being stuck if this is where you are just now.

This list is also one that will come in handy as a refresher when we feel we need to check where were are.

Actually, these are actions I take myself whenever I get to wondering what I really want to be doing next or planning my future when I’ve achieved the things I’ve had on my list to do.

So let’s start out by looking at why people can sometimes find themselves feeling stuck.

Usually, this happen because we don’t know or have forgotten who we really are.  We all start out life being directed and instructed by our parents and those around us.  So much, that many of us never really get into the groove of connecting with ourselves, who we really are inside.  We somehow get the impression that this is not quite the done thing, the way life should be conducted, the way things are done.

So what happens is that we end up disregarding ourselves, our own views, opinions, ideas, wants and needs in place of those of others. Someone else in authority.  Someone else who knows best.

Unfortunately, through this pattern, we can end up believing that the view of others is far more important than our own.  In many cultures especially with their girls, this how they are raised and this can become a huge problem as when the girls grow older.

Over time, this mental and emotion positioning will eat away at us from within and we lose our self-value, self-esteem and confidence. We loose our ability to decided and make choices for ourselves.  Even if we don’t completely lose this, we may still struggle with self-confidence and self-belief.  And these blind spots can hold us back for years. When we don’t know for ourselves what we would even like to be or what we might want to do or try.  Some people become too afraid to try anything at all, so end up not doing the things they dream of doing.

The redeeming thing about human beings in this situation is our indomitable spirit, it will always keep surfacing.  Pushing itself upwards, because it wants to be heard.  It wants to be, to be alive, to achieve and to grow.

This is the sense of dissatisfaction we experience and causes us to begin to ask questions about who are and what we want to be.  That is how we know and feel that we are stuck.  We born to move forward and to grow.  So if you’re feeling this way and asking these questions, you are actually on the right path.  Feeling stuck is the first step toward moving from where we are now to the amazing places we will be tomorrow.

So here are some tips to getting moving forward and no longer stuck and unsure of what you might want to do or become.



* Connect with yourself

* Don’t be afraid of You

* Learn to listen to yourself responses anywhere in our body.

* Identify you core values.

* Accept and take responsibility for yourself and your life journey.

* Prioritise what you want to do now, in the near future and in the distant future.

* Start with making small plans for the things you and to do.

* Do things that make you happy.

* Stop every now and again to check out how you’re doing against your plans.

* Find people that lift you up

* Find people who believe in you

* Choose carefully who you hang out with.

* Measure both your own behaviour and that of those around to against your core values.

 

 

 

 



Hello and welcome to the Mirror Challenge,

If you’ve not had an introduction to the Mirror Challenge, let me tell you what it’s about.

I’m Sandra Pollock. I created the Mirror Challenge and it has help lots of women to achieve the confidence and improved self-image they have always wanted.

Most of us go through our lives using comparisons, feeling or being compared with others or with some unachievable standard of expected behaviour, appearance or being.

This self-image or expectation is something we either pick or developed as we were growing up through the imprinting stages, from our parents, siblings, peers at school, etc., as we try to become who we should be.

Now 9 times out of 10 we don’t end up with enough of a positive image of ourselves.

And many of us want to change this, because it makes up unhappy trying to something or someone we know we are not.   These comparisons, whether made by ourselves or others, tells us that we are not good enough as we are.

And as a result, we spend most of our lives trying to live up to someone else’s standards, ideas and beliefs.

Now more and more scientific research is showing us that what we achieve in our lives is a reflection or as a result of how we see ourselves inside.

In other words our external world – what we are able to achieve – the success, the happiness, the level of life satisfaction, is exact mirror image of our internal world – our self-image, beliefs, habits and our thinking.

Know this makes it all the more important that we become more aware of how we truly see ourselves inside and learn to make changes from within that help us to improve our self-image and create the external world that we want.

I developed the Mirror Challenge to share with other how I have dealt these issues of comparing myself to others, low self-esteem, lack of confidence and poor self-image.  Through the techniques I’ve learnt I have changed my life, to achieve my personal life, business and career.

In the Mirror Challenge programme we work through a series of areas including:



* Self-Image

* Confidence

* Self-Talk

* Self-Image

* Personal Branding

* Personal Responsibility

* Assertiveness and

* Values



All the areas that will help by to refrain how you see yourself and start your process to change your life from the inside out.

So what do you get?

Well you can sign up to receive these complimentary podcasts only or the full 8 week programme.

In which you get workbook, webinars, coaching and podcasts which are separate and specific for the programme users.  We also have our webpages and Facebook support group.

If you like to sign up to join us on the Mirror Challenge follow this link.

To read the transcript of this audio follow this Transcript.

To listen to the podcast click on the audio.