5 episodes

Welcome to The Secure Love Podcast: Real Time Couples Therapy with Julie Menanno. Julie Menanno is a licensed therapist dedicated to helping couples build secure, lasting connections using Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). In each episode, Julie works with a real couple in their 30s, Melissa and Drew, and just like many of us, they are navigating life's challenges, raising kids, managing busy careers, and working on their relationship.

Join us to explore the depths of attachment theory and its profound impact on our relationships. We'll identify negative communication cycles and learn how to create positive, lasting changes. By sharing Melissa and Drew's journey, you'll gain relatable insights and actionable steps to apply in your own life. Each episode offers practical skills and homework assignments to help you foster a more secure and fulfilling connection with your partner.

The Secure Love Podcast is your companion for building healthier, happier relationships. Your journey to a more secure love begins now.

The Secure Love Podcast with Julie Menanno Julie Menanno

    • Society & Culture
    • 4.8 • 59 Ratings

Welcome to The Secure Love Podcast: Real Time Couples Therapy with Julie Menanno. Julie Menanno is a licensed therapist dedicated to helping couples build secure, lasting connections using Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). In each episode, Julie works with a real couple in their 30s, Melissa and Drew, and just like many of us, they are navigating life's challenges, raising kids, managing busy careers, and working on their relationship.

Join us to explore the depths of attachment theory and its profound impact on our relationships. We'll identify negative communication cycles and learn how to create positive, lasting changes. By sharing Melissa and Drew's journey, you'll gain relatable insights and actionable steps to apply in your own life. Each episode offers practical skills and homework assignments to help you foster a more secure and fulfilling connection with your partner.

The Secure Love Podcast is your companion for building healthier, happier relationships. Your journey to a more secure love begins now.

    Finding Balance in Chaos: Who Gets to Hurt Worse?

    Finding Balance in Chaos: Who Gets to Hurt Worse?

    In this week's episode of the Secure Love Podcast, Melissa and Drew dive into a common household challenge that many parents face: the chaos that greets them at the end of a long workday. Drew comes home from a demanding day at work, only to find his kids throwing toys across the patio and being a bit more rowdy than he anticipated. In these situations, Drew wishes he could ease into his evening, but is frustrated by the commotion, leading him to irritation and a tendency to shut down.
    Melissa shares her side, explaining how in tune she is with her emotions and how challenging it is when she can't understand what's going on with Drew. Despite being empathetic to his long day, she also feels like, "well I’ve had a long day too.”
    Julie guides them to understand that both their feelings are valid, but timing and mutual support are key. They discuss the importance of holding space for each other, even when both are hurting. It’s about finding a balance and sometimes literally just going one person at a time and working together as a team through the everyday chaos.
    How do you handle these stressful moments in your relationship? Do you find it challenging to support each other when both of you are exhausted?
    Follow Julie Menanno on social media @thesecurerelationship. Visit Julie's website The Secure Relationship for all information on upcoming workshops and access to resources. Purchase Julie's book Secure Love: Create a Relationship That Lasts a Lifetime

    • 1 hr 11 min
    Handling Crisis: The Anxious-Avoidant Clash

    Handling Crisis: The Anxious-Avoidant Clash

    This week on the Secure Love Podcast, Melissa and Drew share their breakthroughs and real-life applications of their therapy work with Julie Menanno. They've been learning to identify and break their negative cycles, but as always, the journey is full of ups and downs.
    Imagine this: one of their twin boys slams his brother's hand in the door, leading to a frantic trip to the hospital. While Drew is at a work event, Melissa is left to handle the chaos alone. When she reaches out to Drew for help, they find themselves in a classic anxious-avoidant clash.
    Melissa, feeling the urgency of the moment, needs immediate emotional validation. For her, addressing the issue right away is crucial, as waiting can make her feel like her emotions are being dismissed. On the other hand, Drew prefers to process things and discuss them later when emotions have cooled down. Can you see how this disconnect creates tension?
    In these situations, Melissa often feels like a failure as a mom and wife. She battles dark thoughts, wondering if Drew and the kids might be better off without her. It's a heartbreaking struggle many can relate to.
    Join us as we explore how Melissa and Drew navigate these intense moments, using the tools they've learned in therapy. How do they manage to connect despite their differing styles? And what can we learn from their journey to help in our own relationships? This episode is a powerful reminder that progress is possible, even when the road is tough.
    Follow Julie Menanno on social media @thesecurerelationship. Visit Julie's website The Secure Relationship for all information on upcoming workshops and access to resources. Purchase Julie's book Secure Love: Create a Relationship That Lasts a Lifetime

    • 1 hr 22 min
    Take Me Out to the Ballgame: Navigating Attachment Fears and Finding Co-Regulation

    Take Me Out to the Ballgame: Navigating Attachment Fears and Finding Co-Regulation

    In this episode of the Secure Love Podcast, Melissa and Drew find themselves caught in a familiar struggle at a baseball game with their kids. Drew checks out, feeling overwhelmed, leaving Melissa to handle the kids alone. Sound familiar?
    Julie helps the couple dive into the heart of their issues. Melissa opens up about the crushing weight of feeling like a failure and the panic of being left to manage everything alone, even when Drew is right there. Meanwhile, Drew's avoidant behavior, driven by his fear of shame and failure, only pushes Melissa further into anxiety and desperation.
    Can you relate to Melissa's urgent texts, pleading for connection? Or maybe you see yourself in Drew, needing to retreat when things get too intense? Julie guides them through these tough moments, helping them understand the deeper fears driving their actions and how they can start supporting each other better.
    Tune in to see how Melissa and Drew continue to break their negative cycle, and discover practical insights that might just help you and your partner navigate similar struggles. This episode is all about understanding each other’s needs and finding new ways to connect, even when things get tough.
    Follow Julie Menanno on social media @thesecurerelationship. Visit Julie's website The Secure Relationship for all information on upcoming workshops and access to resources. Purchase Julie's book Secure Love: Create a Relationship That Lasts a Lifetime

    • 1 hr 8 min
    Breaking the Negative Cycle

    Breaking the Negative Cycle

    In the first episode of The Secure Love Podcast, we meet Melissa and Drew, a couple navigating the complexities of their relationship. Melissa opens up about her experience of anger and shutdown when she feels disconnected from Drew during stressful times. As she describes her attempts to avoid confrontation and the eventual buildup of frustration, Drew shares his own sense of helplessness and shutdown in response to her anger.
    Join us as Melissa and Drew delve into the vulnerable place of anger and its role in their longing for emotional connection. Julie's main goal for this first session is to help Melissa and Drew understand and break their negative cycle. Through their candid conversation, they begin to understand each other's experiences and find relief in expressing their feelings. This episode offers insights into how anger can be a desperate attempt for connection and how shutting down is a way to regulate pain. Discover how putting words to feelings can pave the way for reconnection and a deeper understanding in relationships.
    Stay connected with us:
    Follow Julie Menanno on social media @thesecurerelationship. Visit Julie's website The Secure Relationship for all information on upcoming workshops and access to resources. Purchase Julie's book Secure Love: Create a Relationship That Lasts a Lifetime  
     

    • 1 hr 22 min
    The Secure Love Podcast with Julie Menanno - Trailer

    The Secure Love Podcast with Julie Menanno - Trailer

    Welcome to The Secure Love Podcast: Real Time Couples Therapy with Julie Menanno. Join licensed therapist Julie Menanno as she uses Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) to help Melissa and Drew, a couple in their 30s, navigate life's challenges and improve their relationship. Discover the impact of attachment theory, identify negative cycles, and learn practical skills for creating lasting positive change. Tune in for relatable insights and actionable steps to build a secure, fulfilling connection with your partner.
    Your journey to a more secure love begins now. Tune in to the first episode on June 24th. 
    Stay connected with us:
    Follow Julie Menanno on social media @thesecurerelationship. Visit Julie's website The Secure Relationship for all information on upcoming workshops and access to resources. Purchase Julie's book Secure Love: Create a Relationship That Lasts a Lifetime

    • 2 min

Customer Reviews

4.8 out of 5
59 Ratings

59 Ratings

Jden75 ,

Relatable with Actionable Steps

Julie’s opening in each episode, narration and explanation of what is going on in each session is illuminating and really demonstrates how to apply her book, and other attachment theory resources to a real anxious/avoidant dynamic. I’m looking forward to seeing how this work helps this couple reconnect and overcome their negative cycle and anxious/avoidant dance, and using this new insight to grow myself, how I show up as anxious and how I can interrupt the negative cycles in my own relationship.

Jillybean231 ,

Excellent resource

This is such a wonderful resource for those who may be reluctant to therapy or simply financially unable to afford it. To witness how this plays out in real life with the offering of emotionally focused therapy tools is invaluable. Highly recommended for the anxious/avoidant dynamic in any relationship. Thank you, Julie, for sharing your work, and to Melissa and Drew for sharing their experience - it is a privilege. 🙏

MurdeMart ,

Please Edit The Audio Delays!!!

OK, I am a huge Julie Menanno fan. Like love her. But these podcasts are totally triggering for me. Because of the way they are not edited. These hour plus podcasts would probably be about 20 minutes long, if you took away the infuriating, an anxiety provoking delays in between when the different people talk.

I mean, seriously, there are several times during each podcast where I think, I did the podcast crash? Is it over? Like to a comical degree it’s really, really, really hard to listen to. And I was so looking forward to this coming out.

Also, I wish she chose a more interesting couple with more interesting problems.

Nonetheless, if not for this audio issue, it would probably be at least four stars.

Also, I hear her doing a lot of putting words into the clients mouths. And I am guessing that is because she is feeling pressure knowing that this is a podcast to be published. I doubt that would be happening in her actual private sessions.

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