What kind of hijinks did you get up to as a kid? Did you climb trees? Did you run around outside barefoot? Did you eat raw cookie dough?
Maybe you wanted to do these and other crazy things, but you weren't allowed…
Let me ask you this: what if your children wanted to? Would you let them?
If you hesitate there, well, you're in the right place. The We Turned Out Okay podcast is where we learn the hows and whys of hovering less and enjoying our young children more. You get to learn from host Karen Lock Kolp's mistakes, but especially from the successes of her guests. Each helpful, lively conversation illustrates why this show really is "The Modern Parent's Guide to Old-School Parenting."
350.5 An Announcement (and FAQs about that Announcement)
Hello! So quickie bonus episode with me are never as quickie as I imagine they would be, but this one will hopefully be informative for you!
In it, I share about the only group coaching I'm offering in 2021.
As a child development expert and parent coach I have given lots of thought on what I could offer that will have the most impact on the well-being of you, and your family, over the coming year.
I've come up with something exciting!
It's called the 2021 Year of Empowerment Program, and it will help you:
– feel in charge of your destiny and your family's direction
– know that you are making the right decisions for you and your family
– live your best life and model that for your kids.
Enrolling means you will spend 2021:
– Getting good behavior from your children
– Advocating for them, helping them love learning and get the best education possible, no matter how bad all of this feels right now
– Feeling good about getting the self-care time that you need and deserve
I expect that spots will fill up quickly, as there are only 20 to begin with and especially with the Black Friday special I'm offering, 50% off the cost of the program!
To get notified when enrollment opens go to:
If you've got any questions email me, Karen (at) weturnedoutokay (dot) com.
Thanks for reading/listening and Cheers!
Click the link below to learn more about the 2021 Year of Empowerment:
Click the link below to get notified when enrollment opens:
Here are the FAQs in written form:
FAQs about the 2021 Year of Empowerment Program
– What is the age range for people's kids in the program?
Parents with kids in all ages and stages of childhood, from babies and toddlers on up to teens, are welcome.
The issues that parents are confronting have kind of converged since the onset of the pandemic.
There are no conventions anymore. Everything is unprecedented. Parents with children of every age are feeling this seismic shift.
As a result the Year of Empowerment will be a great, supportive community for parents with kids of all ages. It will help you build the life that you really want within your family.
– How will this program work?
The 2021 Year of Empowerment Program has two main facets:
1. Each month of 2021 we will have a group coaching conversation, a powerful, in-depth, 90 minute call diving into the different aspects of empowerment including advocating for your kids, establishing boundaries so you only ever do what feels truly good for you, and modeling a wonderful and empowering life for your family.
2. A year’s subscription to the acclaimed We Turned Out Okay Playbook!
The Playbook provides a place for you to envision and build out your life and your family’s future.
The 2021 Year of Empowerment program includes a whole year – 12 issues – of the Playbook, one each month, delivered directly to your mailbox! (US only; internationally you’ll receive the digital version of the Playbook.)
Each month you’ll receive this top-shelf publication that shapes your thinking in a very positive and gratitude-centered way.
(Learn more about the Playbook at https://weturnedoutokay.com/playbook)
Between our monthly calls and the daily, positive and creative thinking opportunities the Playbook offers, the 2021 Year of Empowerment Program gives you extremely powerful tools to shape your life how you want it.
– What if I can't make a meeting?
That is absolutely fine… You can be committed and still not be able to get to every single meeting over the course of a whole year.
So, each monthly meeting and the PDF of each month's We Turned Out Okay Playbook will be placed in the password-protected 2021 Year of Empowerment Resource Hub.
That way, you'll be able to go back and watch
350: "Letting go of what others think" with Debbie Reber of TiLT Parenting
There are just 20 spots available in my 2021 Year of Empowerment coaching program for parents… Don't miss your chance to join this powerful program!
Be notified when I open enrollment for the 2021 Year of Empowerment Program (enrollment begins 11/23!) by clicking the link below:
I am super excited to bring you today's episode, which includes so much good that my heart is practically bursting : )
It's a digest episode, and the first part is my conversation with Debbie Reber, founder of the TiLT Parenting Podcast, http://tiltparenting.com, and author of one of my favorite books, Differently Wired: Raising an Exceptional Child in a Conventional World.
Somewhere in the first few minutes we decide to depart from a kind of standard interview, Q&A sort of conversation and dive into something much better and more fun!
Here are some of Debbie's ideas that felt so transformative for me:
– "I love that you mention taking care of your body…" Debbie goes on to share how important this idea is, and how often we truly do forget.
(My forgetting, as I share today, landed me in the hospital just a few weeks before our conversation.)
– "Asking "What if I had no agenda at all?""… Debbie brings this up in reference to children and learning. If we don't have an agenda, we are free to just be in the moment and enjoying the time with our children. And more – if we don't have an agenda we are free to allow our kids on a voyage of self-discovery. This is crucial, even more so with the world turned upside down from the pandemic.
– "I have permission to do whatever I want and feel whatever I feel."… Debbie shares this as a way of diffusing judgment. Giving ourselves this permission is so freeing.
I hope this conversation is transformational for you, too!
In Part 2 I read an essay I wrote recently, called "A hard decision I have made."
It shares about the decision I recently made to close my Ninja Parenting Community – and after I read it, I share about something I'm truly excited about, the group coaching program I'm offering for 2021 called "The Year of Empowerment."
2021: The Year of Empowerment Program:
… Helps you combat the challenge of others walking all over you, so you feel in charge of your destiny and your family's direction.
… Helps you overcome your fears about your child's behavior and others'' judgment of that behavior or your parenting. So you know that you are making the right decisions for you and your family.
… Helps you stop feeling guilty or unworthy so you can live your best life and model that for your kids.
Each month of 2021 you'll be empowered to truly take the reins in your family life.
You will know how to get good behavior from your child.
You will know how to advocate for them, to help them love learning and get the best education possible – no matter how bad all of this feels right now.
You will know how to feel good about getting the self-care time you need and deserve.
How will this program work?
1. Each month of 2021 we will have a group coaching conversation, a powerful, in-depth, 90 minute call diving into the different aspects of empowerment including:
– The setting of proper boundaries to eliminate toxic people from your life
– Learning to say "no," so you only participate in and do what feels truly good for you
– Advocating for your child
– Learning the tenets of positive discipline, so your child does not walk all over you anymore
– Teaching your child about the world
– Living a truly wonderful and empowering life
– Consequently modeling "how to live a truly wonderful and empowering life" for your family
2. A year's subscription to the acclaimed We Turned Out Okay Playbook!
The We Turned Out Okay Playbook provides a place for you to envision and build out your life and your family's future.
The 2021 Year of E
349: Kindergarten Evals, Parent-Teacher-Conferences, and Lessons I learned from being hospitalized last week
As a child development expert one of the most important jobs I have is to give parents permission to disagree with teachers or other authority figures in their children's lives.
Starting at around the 50-minute mark we talk about that. It's coming up for many podcast listeners and Ninja Parents right now, and it's important to discuss!
But first, I share three super important lessons that I learned the hard way recently, by ending up in the hospital with diverticulitis. It's the illness I had nine years ago that brought on the tendon condition that I lived with ever since, so there was some serious PTSD in getting it again!
It was no accident that I got it now, in the pandemic with pressure mounting societally, in our home, and with the families I serve.
I got it by failing to adhere to these lessons, which I will list for you right now:
1. On the Human-Dehumanized Axis, stay close to the Human side.
Maybe it means unplugging, but it definitely means connecting more on a human level.
Be sure that, when connecting with folks having to do with your child, that they are very human too.
2. Remember that sugar is an inflammatory food.
What we need is good nutrition! I'm a living example of what happens when you don't get that.
3. Understand your own worth.
How you think about yourself matters. I forgot that, and had to undergo a very painful and scary illness as a result.
Most of all, in thinking about these three lessons I want you to think about where you are "coming from" with regard to them.
This isn't about me telling you "here's a list of stuff you need to do."
It's about coming from a place of human connection.
It's about coming from a place of good nutrition, most of the time, without worry or pressure.
It's about coming from a place of feeling worthy – both for ourselves, and for what we model for our children.
Here are the links that come up in today's conversation:
I am a featured speaker in the Virtual Summit, which you can enjoy for free by clicking here:
Click here for episode 279, my conversation with picky eating coach Jacky Lemenzo
For the first time since creating the We Turned Out Okay Playbook, as a result of my hospitalization I'm doing it myself (instead of just writing it for others)!
Click https://weturnedoutokay.com/playbook to learn more about the Playbook!
Click here for episode 270, my conversation with creative coach Dan Blank.
Thank you for being along on this journey with me! You rock!
Cheers! And thanks for listening/reading to this, episode 349, which you can view on the web by going to:
Karen Lock Kolp, M.Ed.
Creator and Founder of https://weturnedoutokay.com
348: How to be the parent your kids need right now
I’m so excited to bring you returning champions Evie Granville and Sarah Davis of Modern Manners for Moms and Dads today!
You’ll learn why the kind of parent that we are matters, especially right now… and you’ll hear how these two wonderful educators take my very cynical Roundtable question and turn it around. You’ll also hear their awesome Roundtable questions for us all to discuss – one pertains to the election, and so I felt I had to publish this episode today, so you’ve got a couple weeks to listen!
Evie and Sarah brought me onto their show in early March 2020, just before the pandemic changed everything. If you listen to that episode, you’ll notice that I identify myself as one kind of parent (what Evie and Sarah would now call a Crescent-style parent)… When I bring them onto my show in episode 340, just a few months later – but after our world has completely changed – my parenting style has completely changed too. I’ve become a Constellation-style parent. For all the wrong reasons!
In the interview portion of today’s episode, I share about my current parenting style, a perfect split between Crescent and Constellation, and how I’ve made my peace with that.
We also talk about their new book! It’s called Modern Manners for Moms and Dads, and you can download the first chapter for free by clicking here: http://evieandsarah.com/book!
Did you notice, I referred to the “interview portion” of today’s episode?
That’s because as I have moved into publishing every other week, it’s opened up really interesting and cool opportunities for making the show just a little different.
We still talk about the same important things. It’s still all about helping you feel cared for, no matter what your circumstances are.
I’m just doing that in different ways that never presented themselves when I released an episode every week.
So for the first half hour or so, I share things like the Parenting News (a REALLY good one today) and some things I’m offering, like
– this week’s Free Live Training on handling worries in a playful way (it’s this coming Friday 10/23/20, sign up here: https://weturnedoutokay.com/weekly)
– the sweet, 3-months-for-the-rate-of-2 deal I’m offering on the We Turned Out Okay Playbook (https://weturnedoutokay.com/playbook)
– how much you’re enjoying the powerful, even magical private coaching calls so many of you have scheduled with me (schedule yours by going to https://weturnedoutokay.com/contact; they are completely free of charge and with no strings attached)
– the Self-care Bootcamp we are doing throughout the American election week, 11/2-11/6, in the Ninja Parenting Community (you can try the Community for your whole first month for just $3, just by clicking https://weturnedoutokay.com/courage!
Then Evie, Sarah, and I have our fantastic conversation…
And after THAT I read you an essay that I’ve written. It’s called Socks and Medicine and Fear and Love (you can read it by clicking here.)
I hope it helps you frame the small, daily choices that you have a little differently. If you, like me, are prone to coming from fear in these small daily choices, I hope it helps you come from a place of love for yourself. Because I truly believe that the only way you can come from a place of love for others.
Click the following link if you’d like more essays like this in your life: https://weturnedoutokay.com/weekly.
And click the following link to view this post in your browser: https://weturnedoutokay.com/348.
Cheers! And thanks for listening/reading!
347 Part 2: A parent’s guide to the dangers of "using history to fit our narrative"
With all the talk recently about something called “patriotic learning,” I wanted to bring you an episode to help you understand how education can become a political football, what that really means for your child, and what you can do about it.
So I called on my friend, historian Gary Gregory. Gary runs a tour company, Lessons on Liberty, bringing folks into the history of the Revolutionary War.
He also runs The Printing Office of Edes and Gill, where he uses the technology of the 1700s to create real documents from that time period, and to bring people into that time period.
Gary knows a lot about history, both real and revisionist, and brings us his wisdom today!
Hope you enjoy this episode!
There are about a million links, and you can find all of them here:
347 Part 1: Five ways societies fail… or succeed
Greetings! If this feels like a pretty ambitiously named episode, well, that's because this is where we are in fall 2020.
We are on the bleeding edge of crisis parenting, and there is a feeling in the air of "this is where our society fails or succeeds."
(At least that's how it feels to me! You are very welcome to disagree. Either way, I hope this episode gives you a roadmap to success on your parenting journey, and some hope.)
Whether a society succeeds or fails is in large part dependent upon the how that society raises its children.
In this episode I offer five ways to think about this idea:
1. A society will fail by operating from a place of fear…
A society will succeed by operating from a place of love.
2. A society will fail by rejecting change and diversity…
A society will succeed by accepting both of these key qualities and using them to move forward together.
3. A society will fail by looking past – ignoring – that which is right in front of it, but which is difficult to look at…
A society will succeed by understanding what is right in front of it, the matter how difficult or upsetting that information is.
4. A society will fail by stunting and mis-shaping children's development…
A society will succeed by embracing children, wherever they are in their development, and by playing to their children's strengths.
5. A society will fail by putting up barriers and excluding those who don't share similar beliefs…
A society will succeed by choosing to connect on a human level, with compassion and empathy, regardless of beliefs.
Thank you for listening! I hope you find this one helpful!
(View this post on my website by going to weturnedoutokay.com/347-part-1)
Announcements and Links… 1. I am a part of the Emergency Home Learning Summit, a 2-month long Virtual Summit that is free to watch in real time! My talk is coming up this Thursday, and that's not all. The creators of the Summit are making it possible for speakers to do really cool virtual things, like live Office Hours!
Learn more and sign up for the Emergency Home Learning Summit here : )
2. I am offering a Quarterly Membership to the Ninja Parenting Community (NPC.)
NPC is where parents are learning how to:
– Help their children adjust to virtual schooling
– Handle it when teachers are, shall we say, less than kind
– Deal with changes in the bedtime routine that results in a child's complete freak out
– Bring a parenting partner on board with positive discipline strategies
– Understand how their values and parenting style impacts their children's development
… And that is just in the last few weeks!
Click here to learn more and join NPC at the Quarterly Membership Rate – 3 months for the price of 2, every quarter that you're a member!
3. My monthly publication, the We Turned Out Okay Playbook, is getting some real accolades; licensed mental health counselor Janine Halloran calls it "A life raft for families who are adrift", and subscribers are saying it's "Worth every penny" and "Simple, and yet so powerful."
Find out what all the fuss is about –
Click the following link to learn more and subscribe to the Playbook:
4. Click here for episode 342, my conversation with coach Mariela Ortiz (where I first learned of the idea that we can come from just one of two places, fear or love.)
5. Click here for episode 339, my conversation with Shannon Connery, PhD, which I reference in today's episode.
6. Click here for episode 344, all about "the secret fears of a child development expert" (that's me.)
7. In this part of the episode I reference one of my all-time favorite books, Visual Intelligence by Amy Herman. She teaches first responders, FBI agents, and others how to overcome their own biases and truly see what is right in front of them. Herman's book is such a model for me, and
Customer ReviewsSee All
Hi all, thanks so much for the good advice. I have used many of your tips and tricks. I also like your guests too. Thanks for communicating how much you care because sometimes it's lonely. I live in a foreign country and after 9 years I'm still not great with the language. I find myself constantly questioning my parenting because most people here would do most things differently. It's helpful to know you're out there with positive ideas for turning the (sometimes) negative into the positive. It's also comforting to know that you struggle with balancing all of your priorities and that it's okay to not be perfect. From your magic words to your anecdotes and your resources, I find your podcast to be a moment for me to take stock and celebrate the small victories I may forget about in the race to do it all.
Shorter Episodes please!
Interesting, but I find the open way too long as a parent, almost 25 minutes into an episode and she hasn’t even gotten into any substance!
The podcast you’ve been searching for!
I recently found this podcast, and I’ve been listening to as many episodes as I can fit in my day. I wish I had found it sooner! Karen’s advice is solid, and on top of that she’s very pleasant to listen to, and she’s encouraging and uplifting as she does it. There are also many personal applications, not only parenting, to be found in her show that I enjoy. For some reason guest speaker podcasts don’t tend to be my thing, but I find even those episodes to be interesting, fun, and helpful. She really makes you feel like you can do this parenting thing. I would love to be a part of this parenting community more.