What Women Fantasize About with Literary Erotica Founder Carly Pifer of Aurore

What if your “low libido” is actually a lack of imagination?

In this episode, Natassia sits down with writer Carly Pifer, founder of literary erotica platform Aurore, to explore what women really want, how responsive desire styles get turned on by storytelling and why reading erotica is such an effective form of low-pressure foreplay.

Carly shares the real‑life experiences that inspired her crowdsourced erotica platform—from interviewing strangers about their intimate lives in bars and going on Tinder “research dates” across Europe to rewriting painful relationships through erotic fiction and helping women feel less ashamed of what turns them on.

For the past two years, Natassia has been an avid reader of Aurore’s stories and loves how it offers a playful way to sample different scenarios, learn what actually lights you up (and what doesn’t), and bring those discoveries back into your own sex life. If you’re curious, use code NATASSIA to get 10% off your subscription at readaurore.com.

00:00 – Why women connect more with erotica than porn

02:00 – Responsive desire vs spontaneous desire

04:18 – Erotica as a place you go mentally

05:25 – Writing through body image insecurities

08:16 – Turning insecurity into eroticism

09:39 – Building Aurore and crowdsourced erotica

10:30 – Why romance novels don’t work for everyone

12:02 – Feeling emotionally safe during sex

13:32 – The rise of “real eaters”

15:44 – Interviewing strangers about sex in bars

18:21 – What people secretly reveal about intimacy

20:03 – Bathroom habits and relationship comfort

22:09 – Pubic hair trends and attraction

24:34 – Tinder dates across Europe

27:12 – Why men struggle to talk about intimacy

28:55 – Two Frenchmen in Paris story

32:12 – Why sex gets better with age

33:35 – Writing erotica as emotional healing

35:01 – Men learning oral sex from lesbian stories

36:25 – What women actually want sexually

37:18 – Fantasies as clues to your deeper desires

39:16 – Using erotica to communicate with partners

41:10 – How to start talking about fantasies

43:45 – Why sexual coaching matters

44:16 – Making quickies hotter through fantasy

45:16 – Love Is Blind and relationship psychology

46:43 – The rebellious origins of Aurore

48:05 – Straight men writing erotica

50:15 – The jeans story and male desire

51:10 – Why threesomes dominate fantasies

53:09 – Female gaze, dick pics, and visual desire

55:14 – Writing erotica to heal sexual trauma

56:34 – Understanding consensual non-consent fantasies

59:10 – Rewriting trauma through fantasy

01:01:06 – A powerful body acceptance writing exercise

01:02:22 – Final thoughts and where to find Carly

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