Today on the Podcast, Discover Which Phase of Transformation You're In.
One of the things I hear so often from coaching clients, workshop attendees, even colleagues and friends is how much they "love" surprises. That, in fact, they actually crave MORE of them.
Turns out? The day-to-day banal operations, the 24-7 hustle, and the pressure of working behind a screen has got them bored to pieces. They'll say, "it's so redundant" or "it's so lonely" and that they're absolutely desperate for ...
New projects, New adventures, New relationships, New opportunities, New memories + new environments to shake them out of their stupor! Funny, enough? Those are the very reasons they chose to launch their own business (versus work for someone else) in the first place. To feel that sense of wonder, excitement, and variety.
And, yet, those experiences of newness and surprise are (often) the very things that elude them. It all just seems so dang predictable. And there's nothing fun about that.
Where they thought they'd get to be spontaneous, they now find themselves stuck in a rut.
Especially when the fantasy of what they "thought" something (or someone) would be doesn't match the reality of what it (or she / he) actually is. And when that happens? We start to feel real restless, which makes us crave novel experiences and new people even more.
Cuz, truth? Freedom is (typically) the #1 reason why so many of us take the risk to launch our own creative endeavors.
The freedom to shift gears. The freedom to come and go as we please. The freedom to set our own rates and choose our clients.
YET, often, freedom's the furthest thing from what we've carved out for ourselves — especially if you've unknowingly built your career castle without the necessary foundational supports and systems to have the space to take a step back, regroup, and redesign as you go.
So, if this is you, huddle up. Cuz there's this one tiny, tiny blindspot (we all have), which I want you to look out for the next time you say, "I'm over this! I want more surprise! More spontaneity! More freedom to make sudden shifts and do what I want!" And that's this ...
We love surprises (as long as we're in CONTROL of them).
Adorable, right? See, the truth is, you probably didn't go into business by yourself ONLY because you're a freedom seeker and a spontaneity junkie. Nope. My bet? You, like me, like so many creative entrepreneurs — mayyyyyy also be a wee bit of a creative control freak.
You love surprises, yes. That's true. Give ya all the swag bags and snail mail, right? What's also true? You (probably) really like the surprises you kinda-already-know-about and can plan around. The ones that feel a little less surprise-y. Inconvenient, ain't it?
Cuz surprises that don't end the way we want them to, that don't leave us feeling all warm and fuzzy? Those? Those we call change.
And as much as we lifelong learners and seekers and artists may love the idea of growing, of expanding, of becoming our best selves and reaching our fullest potential and healing our past hurts — I've yet to meet a-one-of-us who ENJOYS actually doing things differently or having things not go our way.
But here's the truth about change ...
We can't expect everything (everyone) to transform AND ALSO expect everything (everyone) to stay exactly the same. We've gotta get comfortable with being uncomfortable.
Fact is: if you want to play a bigger game, you've got to be willing to shuffle the deck. Deal a new hand. Play another round. And even know when it's time to toss in. You know? That whole "know when to fold em" bit. (Kenny Rogers, anyone?)
And the best way to do that? Surround yourself with A-players, learn which phase you're in, and remember: the only thing constant is change.
In this Episode We Talk About:
How to Identify the 4 phases of Transformation, Discover which phase of the Change Cycle you're in (today), Why some people get ahead and move through these phases more quickl