71 episodes

The all-new home of the Football Clichés podcast.
Adam Hurrey explores the glorious and unique language of football: the words, the phrases, the mannerisms and, above all, the clichés.

Football Cliches Adam Hurrey & Goalhanger

    • Sport

The all-new home of the Football Clichés podcast.
Adam Hurrey explores the glorious and unique language of football: the words, the phrases, the mannerisms and, above all, the clichés.

    The Adjudication Panel: The vocabulary of an England group-stage draw & Euro 2024’s Commentator’s Curse

    The Adjudication Panel: The vocabulary of an England group-stage draw & Euro 2024’s Commentator’s Curse

    Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the latest Adjudication Panel of Euro 2024.
    The agenda includes: the inevitable keywords of the latest England group-stage non-event, some eerily good Euros predictions from the pod back in December, the rampant Commentator’s Curse of Euro 2024, whether Arda Guler’s wondergoal met the “a star is born” threshold, some classic Andy Townsend punditry, a Dutch take on football clichés discourse, the textbook host-nation scenario and a surprise guest on a YouTube watchalong.
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    • 48 min
    The Adjudication Panel: The Euros that didn't need to burst into life

    The Adjudication Panel: The Euros that didn't need to burst into life

    Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the first Adjudication Panel of Euro 2024.
    The agenda includes: the (very predictable) reaction to England's laborious win over Serbia, Gabriel Clarke (sort of) gives his update on the mood in the Cliches podcast camp, which country are "the most Group C team ever", what makes a shot go "agonisingly wide" and more niche highlights from the Euros so far.
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    • 43 min
    The Pure European Championship XI

    The Pure European Championship XI

    On the eve of Euro 2024, Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker are joined by Michael Cox to select a lineup of players most inextricably linked with the European Championship.
    The deliberations feature a strict Greeks and Czechs quota, the "Kopke vs Toldo" dilemma, a Silver Goal scorer in the heart of the defence, a dinker, a scooper and a disgraced former UEFA president in midfield, a clamour for Alan Dzagoev, a frankly inevitable bias towards Euro 2004, Will Grigg on fire (and on the bench) and a battle of the one-hit wonders up front.
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    • 1 hr 2 min
    The Adjudication Panel: 1.4 billion years of hurt, Grealish's mayo hell & the opening-game formula

    The Adjudication Panel: 1.4 billion years of hurt, Grealish's mayo hell & the opening-game formula

    Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: an alternative methodology for calculating England's "years of hurt", the latest a team can take the lead "inside X minutes", the scourge of midfielders being included among the "forwards" in international squad graphics, the obligatory Euro 2024 "dark horses" debate, the Jack Grealish/Hellmann's mayonnaise Euros marketing calamity and obscure Arsenal figures namechecked in video games
    Meanwhile, the panel weigh up the merits of Germany vs Scotland as an opening game and field some important listener questions on hailing, left pegs and players who can "slot in".
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    • 50 min
    Capos, club mentalities & calculating England's actual years of hurt: The listeners' loves & hates

    Capos, club mentalities & calculating England's actual years of hurt: The listeners' loves & hates

    Adam Hurrey, David Walker and Nick Miller entertain this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations.
    Among the selections are the "capo" (the one who conducts the Ultras chants with his back to the game), the joy of just kicking a football right up into the air as high as possible, clubs who have a generation-spanning “mentality” attributed to them, the horrifying split-second when the ball is passed out of frame during a TV game and - once and for all - just how many “years of hurt” it has technically been for England.
    Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel reflect on yet another skincrawling moment for footballspeak in the political sphere and pick apart the mandatory pre-tournament custom of team-by-team guides.
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    • 52 min
    The Adjudication Panel: Mourinho in Turkey, 71 billion calories & a football club every 2.24 seconds

    The Adjudication Panel: Mourinho in Turkey, 71 billion calories & a football club every 2.24 seconds

    Adam Hurrey is joined by David Walker and Nick Miller for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: Adam Lallana squeezing in the phrase "football club" three times in just 6.8 seconds, Gareth Bale declaring himself the last piece of Real Madrid's mid-2010s jigsaw, a former Chelsea captain popping up in The Wire, un-highlights-able sports and a very brief history of England's pre-tournament warm-up games.
    Meanwhile, the panel enjoy the inevitable development that was Jose Mourinho to Fenerbache and decide if you can declare a tournament's "surprise package" in advance.
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    • 45 min

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