45 episodios

The Sex, Love, and Addiction: Healing Conversations for Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Men podcast, featuring Dr. David Fawcett, presents ongoing expert discussions highlighting the life concerns of gay, bisexual, and transgender men. Dr. Fawcett, Vice President of Clinical Programming for Seeking Integrity Treatment Centers, is a licensed psychotherapist and sexologist specializing in co-occurring addictions, notably paired drug use and sex (aka, chemsex). He is the author of Lust, Men, and Meth: A Gay Men’s Guide to Sex and Recovery. In this podcast, he speaks with global experts in addiction, HIV/AIDS, stigma, gay marriage, relationships, and other pressing life issues directed toward gay, bisexual, and transgender men. This podcast seeks to help listeners heal old wounds while facing today’s challenges.

Healing Conversations for Men Who Have Sex with Men Dr. David Fawcett

    • Salud y forma física

The Sex, Love, and Addiction: Healing Conversations for Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Men podcast, featuring Dr. David Fawcett, presents ongoing expert discussions highlighting the life concerns of gay, bisexual, and transgender men. Dr. Fawcett, Vice President of Clinical Programming for Seeking Integrity Treatment Centers, is a licensed psychotherapist and sexologist specializing in co-occurring addictions, notably paired drug use and sex (aka, chemsex). He is the author of Lust, Men, and Meth: A Gay Men’s Guide to Sex and Recovery. In this podcast, he speaks with global experts in addiction, HIV/AIDS, stigma, gay marriage, relationships, and other pressing life issues directed toward gay, bisexual, and transgender men. This podcast seeks to help listeners heal old wounds while facing today’s challenges.

    Addiction in the LGBTQ+ Community Isn’t a ‘Them’ Problem, It’s a We Problem.

    Addiction in the LGBTQ+ Community Isn’t a ‘Them’ Problem, It’s a We Problem.

    Dr. Wesley Detwiler is a licensed Clinical Psychologist practicing in California and he works closely with the LGBTQ+ community and those suffering from addiction and complex trauma. In this episode, Dr. Wesley talks about what sex positive really means when you are in sobriety. He also talks about how the community itself can ostracize men who are seeking recovery, and he also discusses how many men are unaware of the risks of sex and porn addiction when trying to get sober from drugs.  
     
    TAKEAWAYS:
    [1:50] A little bit about Dr. Wesley. 
    [3:20] Dr. Wesley personally struggled with a drug addiction and he knew he had to get sober in order for him to be a successful psychologist. 
    [4:45] How does Dr. Wesley define sobriety? 
    [9:25] Everyone has an underlying need for connection. 
    [11:15] A lot of gay men feel like they’re damaged goods. 
    [12:15] How are we using sex to value or devalue ourselves?
    [17:15] As a community, we can end up ostracizing the very people who need your help the most. 
    [18:30] It’s not a ‘them’ problem, this is a ‘we’ problem. 
    [20:20] What does it really mean to be ‘sex positive’ in sobriety? 
    [23:35] We need to dive deeper and really explore what intimacy and sex really means to the individual. 
     
    RESOURCES: 
    Detwilerpsychology.com
     
    QUOTES: 
    “I didn’t have the tools to ‘adult’ properly. I didn’t have the glue that would stick all those things together in a meaningful or positive way.”
    “For anyone struggling to get sober, do not give up. Sobriety is achievable. The only thing you can’t do is give up.”
    “As a community, there’s work we can do around having a more healthy concept of what healthy sex is.”

    • 28 min
    Lust, Men and Meth translated to German: A conversation with Dr. Fawcett and Karl-Anton Gerber

    Lust, Men and Meth translated to German: A conversation with Dr. Fawcett and Karl-Anton Gerber

    Dr. David Fawcett, the author of Lust, Men, and Meth, has a conversation with the translator of the book, Karl-Anton Gerber, discussing how this project came about, his own story, and the chemsex scene in Germany.
    German title: Lust, Rausch und Crystal Meth: Wege aus dem Chemsex-Konsum bei MSM
     
    TAKEAWAYS:
    [1:50] A little bit about Karl. 
    [3:20] Karl shares his introduction to drugs and how it has affected his life.
    [7:10] Karl is HIV+ and shares how he first found out the news.
    [9:10] Dr. David understands where Karl is coming from. For many gay men, they feel like “damaged goods.”
    [9:40] What made Karl change his lifestyle and get clean? 
    [12:45] Karl shares how this book, Lust, Men, and Meth, changed his life. 
    [16:15] There are no reliable chemsex studies in Germany.
    [20:00] Why did Karl decide to modify his foreword in the German version of his book? 
     
    RESOURCES: 
    Amazon link to German edition: https://tinyurl.com/bdhhj7n2
     
    QUOTES: 
    “I had to admit I had a problem. That was the starting point to getting out of addiction.”
    “My stable life and [the drugs] were separate, but when I was driving down the German highway, there was a little window between those two universes and I couldn’t hide any longer.”
    “These new psychoactive substances are really scary. They’re just chemicals someone put together somewhere and now are selling it on the dark web.”

    • 27 min
    “It Happens to Boys”: Abused Men Are Still Minimized and Marginalized

    “It Happens to Boys”: Abused Men Are Still Minimized and Marginalized

    Carol Teitelbaum is a Marriage & Family Therapist and has been a licensed Therapist since 1985. Carol comes on the show to talk about abuse that has happened to our young boys and how this problem is still minimized in today’s society. She shares some common myths people have about men and abuse and how there’s a deep silence in the community for these men. She discusses the upcoming “It Happens to Boys” conference. 
     
    TAKEAWAYS:
    [2:30] A little bit about Carol. 
    [2:40] Let’s talk about our boys. What happens to boys?
    [3:20] Men do not get over sexual abuse. Men do not just ‘get over it’. 
    [6:30] Men have been told since they were little that they don’t have feelings.
    [8:00] What myths are out there about boys and sexual abuse?
    [9:10] Abuse is not about sex. It’s about power.
    [11:00] Women abuse boys! Boys get very little empathy when they’ve been abused by a woman.
    [15:40] Sexual intimacy goes way beyond just ‘putting it in’. 
    [21:00] How does Carol help someone who has been abused open up?
    [25:50] What does the healing journey look like for men? 
    [29:50] What’s the difference between anger and rage?
    [30:35] Let’s talk about the Creative Change Conference.
     
    RESOURCES: 
    Creativechangeconferences.com
    Menhealing.org
     
    QUOTES: 
    “People still think boys can’t be abused.”
    “Men who do not just get over it. Men who don’t get help or start their healing process, they rage because of all the emotions that they tucked away.”
    “I’ve heard men say, “If you really knew who I was, you’d think I’m disgusting.” It’s because they’ve been abused.”
     

    • 36 min
    Controlling Chemsex: Addressing the Epidemic in the UK and Beyond

    Controlling Chemsex: Addressing the Epidemic in the UK and Beyond

    Ignacio Labayen De Inza is the CEO of Controlling Chemsex, an organization that provides chemsex support to people living in the UK. Ignacio has personally struggled with chemsex himself and understands how lonely and isolating the journey to recovery can be. This is why he’s been working in this field since 2008 to help those struggling with addiction and their relationship to sex. In this episode, Ignacio explains how severe the chemsex problem is in the UK from someone who is on the ground. 
     
    TAKEAWAYS:
    [2:30] A little bit about Ignacio and his life story. 
    [5:15] Ignacio struggled with his relationship with drugs and all he wanted to do was get himself back on track and onto a healthier path. 
    [10:50] Covid made it difficult for Ignacio to continue his work with Grindr.
    [12:30] Why do people use drugs to help with their sex life? 
    [19:00] Sex addiction is just a syndrome to a bigger problem. 
    [21:50] Ignacio has applied for funding to further help the community.
    [23:30] What kind of trends has Ignacio been seeing happening in the UK? 
    [26:20] There’s misinformation everywhere and as the problem gets worse, the stigma continues further. 
    [30:00] Chemsex is a problem everywhere, not just in the UK. 
     
    RESOURCES: 
    Controllingchemsex.com
    Ignacio on LinkedIn
     
    QUOTES: 
    “Lots of people can not pay for private therapy. We are aware of that. All the services that we are providing are free of charge.” “We are applying for money. Times are not easy, we have a recession, but we have to fight.” “What we’re seeing, the chemsex reality is much worse. The problem gets worse but the stigma remains.”

    • 37 min
    The Important Impact Ballroom Has Had on the LGBTQ+ Community

    The Important Impact Ballroom Has Had on the LGBTQ+ Community

    Kenya Hutton has dedicated close to 20 years to working in social justice, equity, HIV prevention, and the facilitation of behavioral interventions among communities heavily impacted by HIV in NYC and Washington, DC. In this episode, Kenya talks about the Ballroom community and how it has been a stable for many LGBTQ+ members for decades now. He explains a little bit of the history and what he’s doing to persevere the history that Ballroom has been to many people who have been shunned by their own families based on who they are.
     
    TAKEAWAYS:
    [2:00] A little about Kenya and his advocacy work. 
    [4:25] Why is Kenya so passionate about HIV prevention work? 
    [6:35] What is the Ballroom Community about? 
    [11:50] Ballroom has taught Kenya how to advocate for himself. Ballroom was a big force of strength for him and for many LGBTQ+ members. 
    [18:10] What is the age limit for Ballroom? 
    [22:15] Ballroom is a place for many children who have been kicked out of their homes for being who they are. 
    [24:30] There are Ballroom chapters all over the world! 
    [25:00] With Ballroom growing so rapidly, what are some of Kenya’s fears? 
     
    RESOURCES: 
    Capitalpride.org/team_members/kenya-hutton
    Kenya on LinkedIn
    Centerforblackequity.org
    BallroomCouncil on Facebook




    QUOTES: 
    “I remember myself being a young queer person feeling like I was the only one. Ballroom is what showed me that there was a whole world out there.” “I’m happy that it’s expanding, but I am hoping we can continue that the core tenants of Ballroom is still upheld as a community.” “People think we’ve gone so far and that we don’t need this stuff anymore, but the moment we get rid of it, you’ll realize how much you really needed it.”

    • 31 min
    The Walls Las Memorias Project: Healing Stigma and Discrimination in LGBTQ Latino Communities

    The Walls Las Memorias Project: Healing Stigma and Discrimination in LGBTQ Latino Communities

    Richard L. Zaldivar has been on the forefront of the fight against HIV/AIDs in the latino and LGBTQ community. His non-profit, The Wall Las Memorias Project, is making important social impacts in Los Angeles, California. Under the project, Richard and team were able to create the nation’s first publicly funded AIDs monument in the US., the first ever AIDs awareness day at the Dodger’s stadium, and they are a strong advocate in the fight against crystal meth. 
     
    TAKEAWAYS:
    [3:00] A little bit about The Wall Las Memorias Project
    [4:00] There was so much stigma about HIV back in 1983. Richard has worked hard to change that. 
    [4:15] What were some of the challenges LGBTQ Latinos experienced?
    [6:20] What is the monument that The Wall Las Memorias Project built and why was this so important to the Latino community? 
    [7:30] Anyone anywhere in the world can submit a name to the wall. You don’t have to be Latino.
    [8:30] A lot of LGBTQ communities shy away from faith or religious aspects, but Richard was purposeful in including it. 
    [9:45] So many Latinos have been broken by religious discrimination. 
    [10:30] In the very early days of the Project, Richard had a catholic priest serve on the board. A lot of members were upset about this. 
    [14:00] Richard shares a little bit about his background and how he knew that this work was his path. 
    [17:00] Meth drug abuse has been rampant in LA communities. 
    [21:40] So many LGBTQ members feel disrespected whenever they walk into a treatment clinic. 
    [24:20] You have to have a holistic approach when it comes to these communities. Many therapists and drug rehab specialists are not trained on these subtle nuances. 
    [27:10] Richard is concerned about HIV support staff. They’re understaffed and on the verge of burnout. 
     
    RESOURCES: 
    Thewalllasmemorias.org/home
    About Richard



    QUOTES: 
    “We’ve been able to build an organization that addresses not only the LGBTQ community, but also the latino community, and underserved communities in the areas of HIV, substance use, mental health prevention, and community and leadership development.”  “I’m a recovering alcoholic so spirituality was already there, but I had a tremendous faith in my God that never left me.”  “In LA, we’re looking at increases of Fentanyl and Meth, which becomes deadly. A number of folks have died from that. The issue is very complex and political.”

    • 30 min

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