Ask Kati Anything Kati Morton

On Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast episode 220, licensed therapist Kati Morton delves into the complexities of suicidal thoughts, the impact of a therapist's age on therapy, and the appropriateness of requesting more physical touch from a therapist. She also clarifies the differences between Patreon and YouTube memberships, offers strategies for overcoming depressive symptoms, and discusses how experiencing sexual abuse at a young age can lead to abusive behaviors in the future.

Audience questions:
1. I have no plan or intent but SI consumes a lot of my thoughts. I have struggled with passive SI for a while but not usually as often and I started doing things like cleaning my room just in case I die even though I have no plan. I don’t know why these thoughts keep entering my brain and I feel confused because the thought of dying both calms me and makes me terrified at the same time. I’m too afraid to talk about it in therapy and then I convince myself it’s not that big of a deal so I don’t say anything. I hope this makes sense because I’m confused with my own thoughts. 01:10
2. My past therapists have all been much older than me, but my current therapist is a few years younger, not by much, but enough for me to feel uneasy. It's been a few years and I am much more comfortable with her now. However, I still find myself screening what I say and I am reluctant to share my struggles. In the last few years, she has gotten married, had a kid, and lost a parent. I already feel like I've fallen behind in life because of my depression and GAD.... 11:33
3. How do you go about asking your therapist for more physical touch? I don’t want to cross any boundaries I don’t know about, and at the same time I worry that I will feel awful if she says no… so I’m really afraid to ask. She has used touch in the past with me (held my hand, placed her hand on my knee to remind me that she was still there when I was disassociating), but I’m scared to ask for it. How do I get over the fear of rejection from her even when I know it would just be a professional boundary? Thank you for these amazing videos! They have helped me so much! 18:55
4. I wonder if you can explain how you view your relationship with your patreons/ community members? I have been thinking of joining but l'm a bit confused about what the relationship is? Thanks. Hope you don't mind me asking again. 30:10
5. I have been suffering from depression and anxiety for the last few years, now I am constantly struggling with a very low mood. I feel like I'm trying to climb out of a dark hole. As it is affecting the normal everyday aspects of my life. What can I do to try and turn these around on a personal level? I have little to no energy or motivation every day... 32:37
6. Hey Kati not really sure if you would want to even talk to someone like me but here we go I guess.. Me and my younger sister were both SA by our dad from a very young age. My sister has started therapy recently and has been encouraging me to go too. I have thought about it but now don't feel like anyone would want to have me as a patient. Our abuser recently passed away and as I was going through boxes I came across some pics... 35:47

PUBLISHED BOOKS
Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j
Are u ok? https://geni.us/sva4iUY


ONLINE THERAPY
While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/kati (enjoy 10% off your first month)

SOCIAL
X: https://twitter.com/KatiMorton
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@katimorton
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/katimorton1/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katimorton
Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/katimorton1/
Patreon: https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/katimorton

PARTNERSHIPS
Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com

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Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/askkatianything/message
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On Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast episode 219, Licensed therapist Kati Morton talks a lot about trauma therapy this week. She dives into how to start our trauma work, if there is ever a thing as too much trauma for therapy, and why it can be so hard for us to change our minds. She then explains ways we can show our bodies compassion, whether or not we can actually erase memories from our mind, and what we can do when our eating disorder changes.



Audience questions:

1. Can you please talk about opening up to your therapist when you have a nervous laugh, dark humor and even darker trauma? I’ve only just started diving into my trauma in therapy but I don’t know how to properly articulate how everything is affecting me. I just laugh and make jokes because... 00:37



2. I've sought out two "Trauma based therapists" who have both told me they aren't equipped to handle my level of trauma. For reference, SA from ages 8-16ish with + preg & subsequent loss as a young teen, and Dissociation during that time. No DPDR, DID, etc. So what do you do when... 09:29



3. Why is it so hard for me to change my mind? I feel once I agree to do something for/with with someone I don’t feel like I can change my mind, I feel like sometimes this is due to not wanting to disappoint others.... 16:29



4. How can I show my body compassion…? I was approved to go to PHP at Center for Discovery in Southern CA. While I am grateful beyond belief that Medi/Medi is covering it, I have SO MANY mixed emotions…I’ve said before that I was born with Spina Bifida. From day 1 my body has not fully functioned, but I’m at the point where I’m probably on no less than 15 medications... 21:56

5. What are the chances I could [completely] erase some traumatic episodes from my memory? I do EMDR and it seems like we are searching for something with my therapist but at times I just feel like there isn’t anything there and I don’t have any specific memories of those traumatic events. I do remember facts of consistent systematic physical and emotional abuse, but not too many specific episodes that we could process in our sessions. My therapist also suspects... 26:19



6. How do I stop overeating sweets?! I was anorexic for a couple years and have physically “recovered” but now it seems that my eating disorder has gone in the opposite direction. I have meals, although sometimes minimal ones, and find that I eat / overeat foods that I'm ashamed of (usually sweets or junk food) when I'm alone and/or at night... 34:38



PUBLISHED BOOKS
Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j
Are u ok? https://geni.us/sva4iUY

A great way to support my channel is to check out our sponsors by using these links:
Amazon: https://geni.us/4J8wb
Instacart: https://instacart.oloiyb.net/y2j2GB

ONLINE THERAPY
While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/kati (enjoy 10% off your first month)

SOCIAL
X: https://twitter.com/KatiMorton
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@katimorton
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/katimorton1/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katimorton
Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/katimorton1/
Support on Patreon: https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/

PARTNERSHIPS
Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com


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Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/askkatianything/message
Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/askkatianything/support

On Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast episode 218, licensed therapist Kati Morton talks about negative self talk, the different ways people pleasing can show up in our lives, and how to connect what we rationally know with how we feel. She then discusses whether or not it’s okay to cuss in therapy, how to healthily lose weight when we have an eating disorder, and whether or not a therapist can be biased due to their speciality.

Audience Questions:
1. I’m someone who sh!t talks myself a lot and my therapist calls me on it. I noticed in some of your videos your will refer to yourself as “the crazy therapist” or “this weird therapist” I wanted to check is this you just poking a bit of fun at yourself for example when I refer to myself as “the crazy lady” in a fun way (not sh!t talking myself) rather than you talking bad about yourself.

2. Can you explain people pleasing and the different ways it can show up? Is it always a pacifying coping mechanism? I find I get dysregulated when my husband is upset so I tend to do things to make him feel better so I feel okay again, any idea what that behavior could be and why?

3. How do I connect what I rationally know to what I feel? I know the "whys" behind my anxiety and know on a rational level that I shouldn't be anxious about it and know how to argue back and how to decrease the anxiety in the short term but nothing helps in the long term because no amount of "thinking" or fighting back against what my anxiety is...

4. I was wondering if it’s ever ok to swear in therapy? I was brought up to be polite and respectful so I watch my mouth in most situations of course this doesn’t mean I don’t swear I just know the company I can swear in vs The ones I can’t. In therapy we were talking about a past trauma and I have described the person before as someone I hate, not a nice person blah blah blah. I think my therapist noticed that I felt more strongly about this as she asked me if “you could describe him in a few words what would it be?”

5. I need to lose weight. It's not just my opinion, I do have excess weight. My health would benefit from losing weight. I'm pre-diabetic, my heart is not doing its best, also the more I weigh, the more my joints hurt. However, I've had every ED under the sun, including anorexia, and in the past I've managed to have a relapse while having a dietitian and therapist. And it turned into anorexia for a year, binge/purge for another year and now binging for the last half year. Every "diet" I've ever had turns into 2-3 years of suffering.

6. Can a mental health professional be biased by their specialization when making a diagnosis? I was diagnosed with BPD, but when I got a new therapist she said that BPD was a misdiagnosis and I got diagnosed with ASD. The first therapist was more familiar with BPD and the latter was specialized in ASD, and I’m wondering if they could have been biased due to their expertise. Is it difficult to tell apart BPD and ASD?

PUBLISHED BOOKS
Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j
Are u ok? https://geni.us/sva4iUY

A great way to support my channel is to check out our sponsors by using these links:
Amazon: https://geni.us/4J8wb
Instacart: https://instacart.oloiyb.net/y2j2GB

ONLINE THERAPY
While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/kati (enjoy 10% off your first month)

SOCIAL
X: https://twitter.com/KatiMorton
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@katimorton
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/katimorton1/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katimorton
Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/katimorton1/
Support on Patreon: https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/

PARTNERSHIPS
Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com


---

Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/askkatianything/message
Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/askkatianything/support

Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast episode 217 | This week licensed therapist Kati Morton talks about getting past inner resistance in therapy, how to keep going when we feel like giving up, and what a therapist would do if their client is intellectualizing everything. She then explains what a body memory is and why our trauma memories can be so spotty. Finally, she discusses anxiety about making phone calls, and why we can be so worried about every little thing we do, and believe that people are going to think we are weird.

Audience questions:

1. Could you possibly talk about getting past inner resistance in therapy? I’ve been in therapy for about 8 months and feel like we’ve done some amazing work, but have noticed I’m hitting some type of wall within myself that I’m not sure how to get past. It’s like I’ve kind of traveled through all the issues I’ve been conscious of, but now that we’re deeper in I’m realizing there’s a lot going on that I was not aware of... 01:14

2. Hi Kati. How do I keep going? I feel like giving up. I have Major Depressive Disorder. Suicidal thoughts and self injury consume me. I’ve done talk therapy, CBT, DBT, ACT, TMS, and ECT. Nothing has helped. I’ve been hospitalized twice. I’ve been on so many medications I can’t keep track anymore. I feel so alone in this. I do have a psychiatrist, therapist and loving family but they don’t understand... 09:54

3. I was wondering how a therapist would approach working with a client who intellectualizes everything? I find CBT and DBT unhelpful because everything my therapist is saying, while totally true, I've already known about and pieced together myself. I think that's also where I get so stuck with therapy- I KNOW there are these pieces out of place that aren't serving me. I KNOW why I am the way I am, but I don't know what to do about it? 24:54

4. I saw one of your older videos about people not remembering their trauma or remembering it in patches but I’m the opposite, I remember what happened to me in great detail even down to what I was wearing, what they were wearing the day and time everything. The only problem I do have is deciding if what actually happened to me was SA... 33:17

5. I noticed recently that I'm really scared to call people I haven't spoken to in a long time. I know they'd love to hear from me and vice versa if they called me. So what's the hang-up (pun intended)? How do I reduce my anxiety around it? It's just literally a fear of pressing call and waiting while the phone rings. I'm not actually scared to talk to these people. What's that about? How do I make pressing the button or the waiting time while the phone rings before they pick up easier? How do I select who to call? Are there steps I can take to get to that point? 42:46

6. Hey Kati what is it called when you are so concerned with the way you walk, blink , eat, move your mouth when you talk, ect. I feel like I walk weird, and I talk weird. I feel like I’m insecure about my voice being too deep or my laugh being too loud. Just little everyday things. I never hear about this. 46:26



PUBLISHED BOOKS

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

A great way to support my channel is to visit our sponsors by using these links:
⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instacart⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠



⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (enjoy 10% off your first month)



SOCIAL

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⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Pinterest⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠



PARTNERSHIPS
Linnea Toney linnea

Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast episode 216 | This week Kati talks about what to do when a therapist forgets our appointment or has to reschedule us last minute, and why that can be so upsetting. She then explains why our self-harm behaviors can change over time, whether or not validation in trauma therapy is good or bad, and the connection between religious trauma and OCD or perfectionism. Then she talks about perfectionism, where it comes from, and why it can permeate our entire life. Finally, she talks about being a highly sensitive person (HSP) and managing our sensory sensitivities.

Audience questions:
1. My therapist who I have been seeing for 2+ years double-scheduled me and another family “in crisis” on the same day recently and I had to go home. She was going to meet me the next day (on Saturday morning) but I felt the need to push away and delayed it to next week. I am really attached to her in this push/pull way and I felt really hurt even though I know intellectually she just made a scheduling error. I also felt upset because it triggered my beliefs from childhood that I'm not as important and that I am always second because the other family had worse things going on. Also, what does family in crisis mean? I have had several times where she has forgotten my appointments. I can't tell whether it is my disorganized attachment or truly an unstable therapy relationship? 01:23

2. Can you talk about why self harm behavior changes? I’ve changed places and how I do it a lot since starting and I’m curious as to why that is? I still have my ‘go to’ spot for when there’s nothing more I need than to do it after flashbacks but it’s changed so much and I’m not sure why... 15:41

3. Lately I've seen several references from other therapists talking about trauma therapy, and that validation can sometimes be harmful in trauma therapy. I had a therapist (who had postdoc training specifically in trauma) who I asked for validation, or correction if I was not correct, because I was perceiving him as incongruent. Turns out he was being incongruent (which came out at the end of a 10 months rupture he would acknowledge existed but refused to talk about directly and openly). I spent months in limbo, operating from the perspective that it was my perception that was the issue, which really impacted my perception of reality and trust in myself... 23:29

4. Can you talk more about religious trauma? What effects does the fear of hell have on a child? I developed some OCD tendencies and extreme perfectionism. Is this common? 31:32

5. I seem to be a perfectionist not only when it comes to work but also in regards to every human interaction I have: Whenever I meet with friends or family, I try my absolute best at making them feel validated and comfortable in my present. I strive to be the perfect listener and friend, although I know that that's an unattainable goal. And I'm not very good at it, either. I get so anxious about making "mistakes" and upsetting someone or even... 37:03

6. I have a follow-up to your HSP video. How do I sort out sensory issues? I know I have some sensory sensitivities being an introvert and having social anxiety. But I also have migraines and don't know if sensory issues are because of the migraines or a cause of the migraines, or could I be an HSP, or could I even be on the spectrum. I've tested... 41:42



PUBLISHED BOOKS

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

A great way to support my channel is to visit our sponsors by using these links:
⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instacart⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠



⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (enjoy 10% off your first month)



SOCIAL

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠X⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠

This week licensed therapist, Kati Morton shares some ways we can be more honest with our therapist about our depression, the difference between understanding something intellectually versus feeling it emotionally, and introversion versus social anxiety. She then offers some insight into the ways we can appreciate our bodies, how to get in touch with our emotions, and how to tell where you are feeling them in your body.



Audience questions:

1. I find it hard to tell my therapist I feel like I am slipping into another depressive episode. We have done so much work and she has been so proud of me that I feel bad having to say I am slipping. I feel like she will be disappointed in me - even though she'd never admit to it. I want to be honest instead of mask but it's so hard. Why is this so hard for me? 01:10

2. Why is it that intellectually I can understand my adverse childhood experiences and trauma, but emotionally I am an absolute mess? I have been reading many books about ACE's and trauma including both of yours. I bounce between ah ha moments to being unregulated. I can understand why learning was so hard as a child/teenager, my teacher comments that I was "lazy," "not living up to my potential'' or a "daydreamer" are not true, or that I can tune out loud noises or someone talking... 10:46

3. I'm very introverted plus have social anxiety. How can I tell whether I actually need alone time at the moment or am just avoiding it because of the anxiety, but it would be good for me to step outside my comfort zone? 25:11

4. How can I learn to love and appreciate my body? I feel like my body is just this inconvenient attachment I have to lug around all day. I’m irritated when it needs something like food or the bathroom. Sexuality is a completely foreign concept. I’ve done the work to figure out how I got here and obviously there’s many reasons for this. But now I don’t know how to get myself back... 28:09

5. Hi Kati, my question is about getting in touch with your emotions and working through the difficult ones.. for example my therapist told me depression is anger turned inward but everytime I try and get in touch with my anger it doesn’t want to talk to me. I try to work through it during therapy and it doesn’t want to come out. 34:37

6. My therapist tells me that I need to feel my emotions in my body but I can never pinpoint where in my body I feel my emotions, especially positive emotions. 37:38



PUBLISHED BOOKS

⁠⁠⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠⁠⁠
⁠⁠⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠⁠⁠

A great way to support my channel is to visit our sponsors by using these links:
⁠⁠⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠Instacart⁠⁠⁠⁠



⁠⁠⁠⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠⁠⁠⁠
While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠⁠⁠ (enjoy 10% off your first month)



SOCIAL

⁠⁠⁠⁠X⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠Pinterest⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠



PARTNERSHIPS
Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com


---

Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/askkatianything/message
Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/askkatianything/support