6 episodes

Winner of Best Comedy at the 2018 Australian Podcast Awards, CHILDPROOF is an unproduced TV sitcom written by Tony Martin and Sarina Rowell.

The six episodes were performed live at the 2017 Melbourne Fringe by Tony Martin, Geraldine Quinn, Roz Hammond, Andrew McClelland, Damian Cowell, Cristina Laria, Djovan Caro and Lachy Hulme, with a gaggle of guests and narration by Jay Mueller.

It concerns those controversial types, the ‘childfree by choice’. They've been called ‘selfish’, ‘immature’, ‘unfulfilled’ and even ‘unAustralian’ – by their own families! Out of step with a world that exalts the traditional family unit above all else, Ian and Jennifer are also battling extinction in their workplaces – commercial radio and book publishing.

Contains foul language. Not suitable for children.

CHILDPROOF: Tony Martin & Geraldine Quinn Bad Producer Productions

    • Improv

Winner of Best Comedy at the 2018 Australian Podcast Awards, CHILDPROOF is an unproduced TV sitcom written by Tony Martin and Sarina Rowell.

The six episodes were performed live at the 2017 Melbourne Fringe by Tony Martin, Geraldine Quinn, Roz Hammond, Andrew McClelland, Damian Cowell, Cristina Laria, Djovan Caro and Lachy Hulme, with a gaggle of guests and narration by Jay Mueller.

It concerns those controversial types, the ‘childfree by choice’. They've been called ‘selfish’, ‘immature’, ‘unfulfilled’ and even ‘unAustralian’ – by their own families! Out of step with a world that exalts the traditional family unit above all else, Ian and Jennifer are also battling extinction in their workplaces – commercial radio and book publishing.

Contains foul language. Not suitable for children.

    Episode 6 - Baby Fever

    Episode 6 - Baby Fever

    Ian and Jennifer assist with a home birth and, with their jobs in jeopardy, consider a lucrative offer to become surrogate parents.

    Starring:
    GERALDINE QUINN as Jennifer and Bec
    TONY MARTIN as Ian and Tarquin
    ROZ HAMMOND as Caitlin and Claire
    ANDREW McCLELLAND as Mike Pomfrey
    DAMIAN COWELL as John
    CRISTINA LARIA as Brittany and Kat
    DJOVAN CARO as Captain Keith and the Wingnut
    and LACHY HULME as Sturgo and Barry Ginnane.

    With guests:
    SARINA ROWELL as Baby Shower Mum
    and SAM PETERSEN as Burnsey

    And JAY MUELLER as the Narrator.

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    • 31 min
    Episode 5 - The Cat's Pajamas

    Episode 5 - The Cat's Pajamas

    Ian and Jennifer get a cat and become even more obsessive than the baby-mad parents they so frequently mock. 

    Starring:
    GERALDINE QUINN as Jennifer and Bec
    TONY MARTIN as Ian and Tarquin
    ROZ HAMMOND as Caitlin, Shelley and Trish
    ANDREW McCLELLAND as Mike Pomfrey, Wayne and Judy
    DAMIAN COWELL as John
    CRISTINA LARIA as Brittany
    DJOVAN CARO as Shane
    and LACHY HULME as Sturgo

    With guests:
    SARINA ROWELL as the Receptionist
    and SAM PETERSEN as Mitchell Block and Dion

    And JAY MUELLER as the Narrator.

    • 29 min
    Episode 4 - Child Labour

    Episode 4 - Child Labour

    Ian finds himself competing with the work experience kid, while Jennifer pretends to have a foster child in order to reap the benefits at work. 

    Starring:
    GERALDINE QUINN as Jennifer and Bec
    TONY MARTIN as Ian, Tarquin and Gavin Wood
    ROZ HAMMOND as Caitlin
    ANDREW McCLELLAND as Mike Pomfrey, Jeff and Con the Fruiterer
    DAMIAN COWELL as John
    CRISTINA LARIA as Brittany
    DJOVAN CARO as Cyrus, Anton and Hurley
    and LACHY HULME as Sturgo and Sir Leo

    With guests:
    SAM PETERSEN as Mitchell Block
    and LEE SIMON and BRIAN MANNIX as Themselves

    And JAY MUELLER as the Narrator.

    • 32 min
    Episode 3 - A Long Weekend

    Episode 3 - A Long Weekend

    Ian and Jennifer are forced to look after three young children over a long and increasingly disastrous Anzac Day weekend. 

    Starring:
    GERALDINE QUINN as Jennifer and Bec
    TONY MARTIN as Ian and Tarquin
    ROZ HAMMOND as Caitlin, Shelley and Katie
    ANDREW McCLELLAND as Mike Pomfrey and Wayne
    DAMIAN COWELL as John
    CRISTINA LARIA as Brittany
    DJOVAN CARO as Captain Keith and the Kids
    and LACHY HULME as Sturgo, Henry and Sir Leo

    With guests:
    CASEY BENNETTO as Christos Tsiolkas
    and SAM PETERSEN as Ernie Dingo

    And JAY MUELLER as the Narrator.

    • 32 min
    Episode 2 - In the Vichysoisse

    Episode 2 - In the Vichysoisse

    Ian and Jennifer become the public face of ‘child-hating’ after an incident with a screaming child at a restaurant propels them onto the front pages. 

    Starring:
    GERALDINE QUINN as Jennifer and Bec
    TONY MARTIN as Ian and Tarquin
    ROZ HAMMOND as Caitlin, Mandy-Anne and the Angry Mother
    ANDREW McCLELLAND as Mike Pomfrey and the Waiter
    DAMIAN COWELL as John
    CRISTINA LARIA as Brittany
    DJOVAN CARO as  the Maitre’D
    and LACHY HULME as Sturgo and Mal Paget

    With guests:
    SIMON ROGERS as Roderick
    and SARINA ROWELL and SAM PETERSEN  as Society Members

    And JAY MUELLER as the Narrator.

    • 28 min
    Episode 1 - Bring the Kids

    Episode 1 - Bring the Kids

    Ian and Jennifer, a happily childfree couple, don’t fit in at work, where family values are ascendant, or at home, where all their friends are having kids.

    Starring:
    GERALDINE QUINN as Jennifer and Bec
    TONY MARTIN as Ian and Tarquin
    ROZ HAMMOND as Caitlin, Shelley and Claire
    ANDREW McCLELLAND as Mike Pomfrey and Wayne
    DAMIAN COWELL as John
    CRISTINA LARIA as Brittany
    DJOVAN CARO as Paul
    and LACHY HULME as Sturgo and Sir Leo

    With guests:
    SIMON ROGERS as Ted
    SARINA ROWELL as Kerry and the Receptionist
    and SAM PETERSEN as Dion

    And JAY MUELLER as the Narrator.

    • 27 min

Customer Reviews

VeroniqueMelbourne ,

Love from the audience

I was there in the live audience and had a blast laughing along to this relatable content! Hope there’s more to follow and hopefully a TV series too? Congrats on a great show.

@thelisaskye ,

Great performances

Fast-paced laughs from some of Melbourne's best.

so_s ,

Brilliant

Better than most TV shows. Simply loved it. Thanks all!

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