This is a place for you to find the information and support you need to make the transition to motherhood an empowering one.Together your hosts Kelly Wilkes and Bree Holling will combine evidence-based information with personal insight to help you heal from past experiences, make informed and empowered decisions, grow as individuals and mothers and find solidarity in this journey that is matrescence. Whether you are a mother, a birth worker or just a woman driven to be the best version of herself, as long as you like belly laughs, heart warming stories and over sharing, this is a place for you.
#24 Matrescence - Navigating the Identity Shift with Yara Heary
In this episode, we sit down with Yara Heary, to talk about the identity shift that accompanies matrescence.
Yara is a Perth Based psychologist who works exclusively with women throughout conception, pregnancy, and motherhood. Yara started Life After Birth Psychology following the birth of her first son which started her on yet another journey of self-rediscovery. Her experiences throughout early motherhood sparked her passion to support other women as they navigate their own family of origin dynamics, the social programming of the “good mother”, relationship changes with those around them, identity shifts, and role changes to find their place of balance and authenticity as mothers.
Throughout this episode we take a look at our identity shifts when we become a mother. We discuss the fact that sometimes the process of becoming a mother can cause us to lose touch with ourselves, to let go of our goals, hobbies, aspirations and friendships, and what to do about it.
We normalise the changes of matrescence, and the fact that sometimes we are not in love with every single part of it, and we give both hope and strategies to find your way back. me.
This conversation brought us right back to the very reason we started this podcast: To better understand matrescence, and how it can affect our experiences as both women and mothers.
If you have ever asked the question "Who am I now that I am a mother?"
If you have lost touch with your interests and passions.
If you sometimes feel discontent or restless in your mothering.
If you are feel that your old friendships, career, goals or hobbies are no longer serving you, then this episode is for you.
To find out more about Yara and the work she does visit www.lifeafterbirth.com.au or engage with her on Instagram @lifeafterbirthpsychology
Yara also has an 8 week coaching online group starting next year for mothers called the Rebirth. Interested people can find out more and register at https://mailchi.mp/lifeafterbirth/rebirthwaitlist
To continue this conversation, connect with us on Instagram: @matrescence.podcast
Head to our website: www.matrescencematters.com.au
To chat to like-minded women, join our Facebook group: Matrescence Matters
#23 Gentle Parenting with Rebecca Cefai
In this week’s episode we talk to Rebecca Cefai from Growing Gently Psychology about all things parenting.
As a registered psychologist with many years of experience working in the childhood development and parenting space, Rebecca was perfectly positioned for a smooth transition to motherhood.
However, like everyone else, motherhood turned her world upside down and she quickly realised that there was a gap between best practice parenting and what was realistic when you were on the ground, in the trenches and knee deep in parenting.
Throughout the conversation we discuss both what the research says about parenting and our own lived experiences, including stories of when we really got it wrong.
Rebecca teaches us how to get clear about our parenting style, what to do when you are not on the same page as your partner, how to repair when you f*ck it up and so much more.
Subsequently, we explore the responsive/ gentle parenting style, including what it is, why there is a growing trend towards this kind of parenting and what it looks like in a real life context.
At 37 weeks pregnant and in lockdown, Rebecca also shares her plans for birth, including her hope to have a maternal assisted cesarian.
This was an honest, vulnerable & non-judgemental conversation about parenting.
Join us for this weeks episode.
To continue to conversation connect with Rebecca at @growinggentlypsychology
Follow us at @matrescence.podcast
Head to our website: www.Matrescencematters.com.au
Join our Facebook group: Matrescence Matters
#22 Your Pelvic Floor in Pregnancy, Birth and Beyond with Caitlin Dunsford
In this weeks episode we chat to Caitlin Dunsford who is a women’s health physio working across both the public and private sectors in Sydney.
Throughout this episode we chat to Caitlin about some of the normal changes that your core and pelvic floor undergo in order to grow and bring a baby into this world, how to take care of your pelvic floor in pregnancy and in the early postnatal period, and how to know when things are not as they should be.
We also discuss what a women’s health physio does, when and why you should see one and what to expect from your appointment.
Lastly, we grill Caitlin with some rapid fire questions from our Facebook group members.
This conversation was fun and informative. The information we covered should really be required learning for anyone who has a vulva, whether they plan to, hope to, or have already had children themself.
Regardless of what stage of your journey you are at, this conversation will hve you feeling more informed about your pelvic floor.
To connect with Caitlin:
Caitlin’s Pelvic Floor Project: https://thepelvicfloorproject.com/our-programs
Links to resources mentioned in the episode:
To continue the conversation connect with us:
Follow us on Instagram: @matrescence.podcast
Join our Facebook group: Matrescence Matters
Head to our website: www.Matrescence matters.com.au
#21 Rediscovering what normal sleep looks like with kids
As a new mum, your baby's sleep habits can easily dominate conversations.
Is she sleeping through the night? How often does she wake over night? Does she self soothe? Does she sleep in the cot, my baby will only sleep on me. You will ask each other overe coffee.
We search the internet, books, social media and chat to other mum's in order to gage what is normal and to find answers to the problem of our child's sleep. Throughout the first year of our child's life we chase the elusive goal of sleeping through the night convinced that if we can just reach that point everything will be okay.
We wrongly assume that everyone else's baby is sleeping through the night and worry that we are doing something wrong.
We desperately try to follow safe sleeping guidelines, despite the fact that our babies have not got the memo that after 9 months of being inseparable from their mother, they are now expected to sleep alone in a cot.
Sleep is a pillar of wellbeing. It affects our physical and mental health, the way we parent, our relationship, our ability to perform our work (paid or unpaid) and so much more.
It is unsurprising then that we place so much emphasis on our baby sleeping well. Because if our baby is not sleeping well, chances are neither are we.
In our modern society however, it seems we have lost touch with what normal infant sleep looks like. Coupled with the fact that the demands of modern life are not conducive with wakeful babies, we often find ourself desperate for a solution.
In our desperation many of us turn to sleep programs or sleep school. I know because I have been there. We convince ourselves that patting their mattress or shushing is enough comfort. We ignore that deep yearning to go to and comfort our baby. To bring them into our bed for a cuddle.
We tell ourselves and others that is it working, and maybe it is until a sleep regression come along. Or teething. Or sickness. Or one of the many other disruptions that are so normal in this phase of life.
Whether you choose to bed share, place your baby in their own room, co-sleep, sleep train or any other approach, sleep is going to play a big role in your parenthood experience.
In this episode we dive into what sleep looks like in our home. Spoiler alert, it is not even close to textbook.
We don't have all the answers, like you we are on the journey to figuring out how to get enough sleep in this phase of life, but we can promise you that this conversation will leave you feeling a little lighter, will take the shame out of unconventional sleep situations and will leave you feeling more informed and prepared to tackle sleep – regardless of what it looks like in your house.
Now, as always we want to put the disclaimer that we are not experts in infant sleep. Infact we are not experts in anything. But chances are neither are you.
Like you we are just mum's trying to make sense of the research, to keep our babies safe and to get as much sleep as possible.
Now if you enjoy this episode, we will find you an expert to really dive into this topic. Let us know on social media.
#20 The Role of the Birth Partner with Andrea Hausheer
In this week’s episode we speak to Andrea.
Andrea is a doula and birth educator who works with couples all over the globe to prepare them for birth.
Andrea’s birth courses are unique in that they pay particular attention to the role of the partner- both in birth and in the months that follow.
Throughout the episode we explore the role of the birth partner, why it is so important and how to do it well.
We also touch on some juicier topics partner’s who insists on staying away from the business end or sitting the birth out completely.
This episode is perfect for couples who are currently preparing to give birth or processing the role that their partner played in their birth.
It is informative and insightful and we know you will love it.
If you want to get in touch with Andrea, follow on whichever link suits your needs:
#19 Kirby Hood Birth Photographer- Infertility, Loss, IVF, Step Parenting, Weight Discrimination
In this weeks episode we talk to a beloved member of our Brisbane birth community, Kirby Hood. @olivejuicelifestyle
Kirby is a birth photographer, videographer, Doula and more and was responsible for capturing Emmy’s birth.
While Kirby is well known in the birth community, few know her story.
Kirby’s introduction to motherhood began when she became a step parent to a beautiful two year old girl. As she navigated her co-parenting journey, she was on her own journey to conceive.
What followed was multiple pregnancies, rounds of IVF and devastating losses.
Somewhere along the line Kirby discovered her passion for birth work and began photographing and supporting mothers through pregnancy, birth and beyond.
Some questioned whether she was just torturing herself by surrounding herself with people doing what she longed to do herself.
Kirby and her husband Alex are finally ready to explore IVF again after encountering many barriers relating to her weight. She shares her hopes and dreams for this experience.
Throughout the episode we explore the challenges she has had to work through in order to make peace with her identity as a mother, how being a step parent and experiencing multiple losses has shaped her matrescence journey and the stigma she feels around being a birth worker who has not birthed a full-term live baby.
Red Nose Grief and Loss Support Services: 1300 308 307
SANDS miscarriage, stillbirth and newborn death support 24/7 bereavement support line: 1300308307
What a passion project!
A wonderful resource full of authenticity, informative and credible information and sharing of experiences which means mothers aren’t left feeling so alone in their thoughts. So refreshing and on my go-to list for all of my new mum friends!
Informative and relatable
I love listening to this podcast. Kelly and Bree are warm and pleasant, it feels like listening to a good friend. Matrescence is a huge shift that we go through as women, one that is not talked about enough. I’m grateful to have found this podcast and for the validation and solidarity it has given me.
In my fourth post partum and really enjoying listening to these two lovely women chat about their experiences, thoughts and research findings on topics of motherhood & matrescence. The balance between the two hosts and the fact they are at different ages and stages of their motherhood journey works beautifully.