Thriving In Motherhood Podcast | Productivity, Planning, Family Systems, Time Management, Survival Mode, Mental Health, Visio Jessica Jackson

Earlier this year I shared what I did to make my smartphone less “smart” (Digital Minimalism in 2024). Since then, our family has faced some unexpected challenges that pushed us into survival mode, and naturally, our screen time increased, including mine. 
This experience made me realize the unique challenges we face at different stages of our journey from merely surviving to truly thriving, especially regarding phone usage.
In this week’s episode, I delve into these challenges and how becoming aware can lead to positive changes.
Challenges with Phone Usage on the 5-Step Path from Surviving to Thriving
Survival Mode: Increased screen time, watching more movies with the kids, zoning out with shows or scrolling.
Re-entry: This is when we feel the most overwhelmed and tired, so we use phones as an easy escape. But this only prolongs the process of re-entry.
Normalizing: Rewarding ourselves with screen time after a good day, leading to late nights and inconsistent routines.
Exploring: Spending excessive time on phones researching or learning, starting with good intentions, but often getting trapped in endless scrolling.
Each stage presents its own set of challenges, slowing down our progress.
Changes I’ve Made To My (Android) Phone:
Niagara Launcher (free version)
No Chrome/Internet
Essential apps only: phone, texting, calendar, Google Maps, Notion (for work), church directory, scriptures, LibriVox, Libby, Marco Polo, Kajabi (for courses I've bought)
Put my phone away instead of carrying it with me
Impact: Increased productivity (even with insomnia)
Solving problems caused by a lack of connection by being present with my kids
Tackling household issues together with my kids because my phone is put away

We woke up on Saturday morning and my son was staring out the back window when he realized he couldn't see the zipper on the trampoline across the yard. Upon closer inspection, he realized that one of the huge limbs on our peach tree had broken and had fallen on top of the olive tree next to it and on the ground. 
We didn't have any big storms or high winds and the kids were asking if I knew what happened. Looking at the branches with peaches full of fruit it didn't take too long to realize that the weight of the peaches - still not ripe - was too much and broke the thick limb.
This image immediately brought to my mind all of the projects, habits, and goals that I am working on right now in our home, family, garden, yard, homeschool, and business. After months of just being in survival mode, it feels so good to be making progress and gaining momentum in many areas of our lives. It is exciting to be crossing things off the list, solving some big pain points, and investing in relationships and projects that will last. But as we are charging ahead at top speed, this peach tree gave me pause about all of the "fruit" I'm trying to grow right now in my life.
There was a crucial step that we missed in caring for this peach tree - pruning.
If we had pruned some of the fruit off of the tree, the weight wouldn't have been too much and the tree would be fine.
Instead of choosing to remove some of the fruit, we lost all of it (this would have been really sad, except this peach tree actually has a fungal infection so the peaches rot before they ripen and we were planning on taking it down this year anyway).
It was a great reminder that If I don't do some pruning in my own life, it can be a fast track to burnout. Then all progress comes to a halt and we lose all of the fruit instead of just choosing a few things to let go of or simplify.
What does this look like practically? How do we do some pruning in our own lives - especially when there are plenty of things we don't want to walk away from?
The secret is a quarterly review. I first learned about this concept years ago from Greg McKeown's book, Essentialism, where he recommends a quarterly offsite review. This means you leave and go somewhere away from your home and work to think about your life.
As a mom with a baby and toddler, this sounded like a fairyland ideal. However, that didn't stop me from doing an onsite review right in the walls of my own home.
This entire process is in the Thriving in Motherhood Planner every quarter so you don't even have to remember how many months have gone by - when you see it, it's time to sit down and go through the process.
You can do this in one sitting or over a week or two as you evaluate your life and figure out what matters most going forward.
I walk through the entire process step by step in episode 102.
You can also learn about quarterly reviews fit in with the entire planning system process with the Plan a Week You Can Win training 
If we don't life can start to be like a snowball that you keep rolling around and acquiring more snow - getting bigger and bigger until you can't move it at all. Or like the peach tree whose limb snaps.

What do you do with all the stuff your kids create? This is something I have struggled with for years with my four very creative children.
In this week’s episode, I’m sharing what has been working for us, our current problems and what we are doing about it, and a brand new framework my children and I came up with that is changing how we think about the things they (and I) make.
Here are some of the things that have been working for us for a while:
Paper management: Each child has a small drawer where we can dump anything they made that is flat. Once the bin is full we go through it and take pictures of things they don’t want to forget and put things they really care about into their paper box (file folder with files from 0-18 years). Everything else gets thrown away.
3-Dimensional projects: Each child has a Maker Box where they can put the things they’ve made that they don’t want to get rid of because they still want to play with it or it’s particularly cool.
They are keeping the majority of the projects in their bedrooms while I focus on decluttering the rest of the house and creating spaces that are super easy to reset and modeling getting rid of things. The kids desire to have their rooms match the rest of the house.
While these things have been working there are still some problems. The Maker Boxes do not contain the amount of stuff that they create and a one-in, one-out rule is pretty painful when they are things they love to play with. 
It’s also painful to have messy bedrooms that are hard to navigate and find things in.
While discussing these problems over breakfast, the kids and I created The Creation Cycle:
You have an idea.
You gather supplies.
You make it.
You take a picture of it (optional but sometimes they like to do this with their important creations)
You put the supplies away.
You enjoy it – either playing with it or displaying it.
You find a home for it and put it away or throw it away.
As we discussed what this looks like in our home, the kids identified that we have two main points where we are having problems with the cycle.
There is nearly zero friction between having an idea and getting supplies to start making something. While in some ways this is fantastic, it also means there are usually LOTS of things in the first few steps of the creating cycle and rarely are those things making it all around the loop.
Our biggest drop-off spot is after step 3, which is why bedroom surfaces have piles and piles of things on them.
Right now, having a language to identify where the problems are happening and where every item in the room is in the Creation Cycle has been life-changing! 
It changes the questions we are asking and empowers the kids to make decisions about what we do with things next. And we’re getting very close to having even the bedroom easy to reset (one down, one to go).
As you think about creativity in your home, I’d love to know if this cycle fits into what is happening with your family as well. What’s working well? Where are the breakdowns happening?

We have four very creative kids who spend HOURS each day creating things (the most recent was an elaborate tin can phone system complete with bells and wall mounts for the cans to go between the top and bottom bunk). 
In this week's episode, I'm sharing the things we've done that have made the biggest impact on raising creative children.  
8 Tips For Raising Creative Kids
Encourage their interests. 
For example, from the time our son was 18 months old, he used our couches to build vehicles. To support this, we built wooden boxes he could combine with stools, chairs, and a nugget couch. This has sparked endless imaginative constructions. 
Expose your kids to new experiences
Anytime our kids get in a funk and don’t know what to do, we try to take them somewhere and let them experience something new. These experiences provide fresh inspiration to fuel their creative ideas.
Have supplies on hand
We like to have scissors, glue, cardboard, and paint on hand at our house. Think about the things your kids like to create and make those supplies accessible, easy to use, and easy to put away.
Teach kids basic skills
We’ve taught our kids how to knit, crochet, carve, use the sewing machine, hand sew, and weave. Giving them these basic skills has allowed them to create even more things. While we don’t force these skills on them, we support their interests by teaching them what they need to bring their ideas to life.
Get books from the library on a variety of topics
Borrow books from the library on various subjects. Exposing your kids to a wide range of topics is crucial for sparking their creativity and broadening their horizons.
Help your kids create the things they want
If our kids say they want something we help them make it. We’ve made shoe and coat racks, bows and arrows, chisels, hammers, swords, and shields. When they were little we were much more involved. As they’ve gotten older and more experienced, we’ve allowed them more independence as they create and build.
Allow them to listen to audiobooks while they create
Audiobooks are a fantastic way to keep kids engaged while they create We’ve found a good audiobook can extend their creative projects.
Model creativity
Creativity starts with us as parents. By modeling creativity, involving our kids in our projects, and providing inspiration, we set the stage for them to be more creative. We actively support their ideas and encourage them to explore and experiment.
One of the most impactful things you can do as a parent is to develop a high tolerance for stepping back and letting your kids create. This might mean occasional disruptions, like missing kitchen chairs or dealing with creative messes. We’re currently teaching our kids to clean up after their projects, balancing creativity with responsibility.
The more we embrace their creativity, the more it flourishes. Every mess, project, and mistake all add up to a fulfilling and creative life.

Whether you are exhausted, depressed, sick, burned out, or just want a break, in today's episode I'll be sharing my #1 tip that I've used for the last 10.5 years of motherhood to get me through the day when I need some space we still have the day to spend together.
The solution has two parts: Go outside and do something creative.
When my kids were little and we lived in an apartment, this looked like bringing things I could do with my hands to the playground: whittle spoons or animals out of sticks or scrap wood, crochet blankets, make shoes out of leather, or peel apples to make applesauce. 
As my kids got older and we now live in a home, this often looks like doing house projects. Recently we've done major updates in our garden, built a retaining wall, made a bed frame, cut out wood animals for the kids to carve with friends, and we are currently building a rock climbing wall in the garage. 
Always I've played instruments, often outside, for a low-energy creative option. A ukulele, guitar, or fiddle is a convenient option to grab and go to the great outdoors. 
No matter what season of motherhood I'm in, the result has been the same. 
Everyone was happier once we stepped outside. Fighting decreases. The kids get engaged in good play. I get some space and a break from having people touch me. And creativity brings some joy and satisfaction into my day, no matter how tired or crummy I feel.
The thing I wasn't expecting was just how creative my kids would become from watching me over the years. There is never a dull moment at our house. Someone is always making something, or playing an instrument, and they are usually outside.  

It is so easy to fall into the "all I do is.." trap. 
You fill in the blank - change diapers, drive kids to school and activities, feed people, nurse the baby, chase after the toddler. No matter the season of motherhood you are in, there are things that we do over and over again. And when we start to think that it is all we do, we can start to feel miserable and resentful of the people we love the most. 
The antidote is simple but incredibly powerful: do a monthly review. 
Even after 7 years of this 10-minute exercise, I am still surprised at how it changes my perspective and how I feel about my life. 
In this week's episode, I'm sharing my findings from my most recent review in April and show you how you can do it yourself too.
5 Questions To Ask In a Monthly Review:
What have I discovered or learned this month?
What have I accomplished?
Where have we gone?
What significant things happened in our family?
What books have I read or listened to (or podcasts or shows if that is the season you are in)?
When you ask these questions you can see how rich your life actually is. And you can begin to build momentum and keep the progress going. 
When you see you read a book - you are a reader! What else can you read? When you see you've made progress on projects or goals you can feel motivated to take the next baby steps. When you discover or learn something you realize just how interesting this life is and wonder what else there is to learn. When you see all the places you've gone it is easier to get out of the house again.
And when you record the significant things in your family you realize why your house is in the state it's in...or maybe more accurately, how great you are really doing as you invest in these people and relationships.
And if you discover that you don't have much to write about, you will have a clearer picture of WHY which brings much more compassion, grace, and understanding as well as gives you clues on how to move forward.
You can do this in the Thriving in Motherhood Planner on the monthly review page so you don't even have to remember that a month has gone by - you just do it when the page shows up - or in a notebook or journal you already use. 
If you want to do it with someone to celebrate your progress and plan what you are going to focus on for the next 30 days with some accountability, come join us in Soaring Mother's Society where we share our monthly reviews in small groups.