I'm Not Your Shrink Podcast Nation

Have you ever wondered why you constantly end up in the same type of relationship? Or maybe you're contemplating whether or not you can continue on with your current partner. These are all common questions we've all asked ourselves at some point in our lives and will be addressing in today's conversation.

In this episode, Dr. Tracy welcomes Amy Chan, founder of Breakup Bootcamp and author of "The Breakup Bootcamp: The Science of Rewiring Your Heart," to discuss why we stay in bad relationships and how to break harmful patterns. Amy shares insights from her own experiences and her work in helping people heal from heartbreak by understanding the deep-rooted reasons behind their relationship choices. They explore concepts like the attraction of deprivation and the sunk cost fallacy, highlighting why people stay in unfulfilling relationships and how to recognize these patterns. Amy also introduces the "shit bucket" theory, emphasizing that all relationships have challenges, and it's crucial to have realistic expectations and effective communication. This conversation offers valuable advice on nurturing oneself, maintaining a sense of self, and fostering mutual motivation and creativity in relationships, ultimately guiding us toward healthier, more fulfilling connections. 
 
Be sure to follow Amy on Instagram, buy her book here, and visit her website here!  

Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here! 

Links:
Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions! 
Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    
You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!   
Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop      
Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected  
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this mini session, Dr. Tracy and her husband Greg debunk the myth of "Happy Wife, Happy Life." They argue that true happiness in a relationship should not come at the expense of one's own well-being. They emphasize the importance of having difficult conversations and maintaining a genuine friendship within the relationship. They also touch on the necessity of self-awareness and curiosity in resolving conflicts and highlight that we can only control our responses, not our partner's actions. Ultimately, they stress the importance of authenticity and mutual respect in building a healthy, balanced relationship.

Listen to the full episode here:
Spotify
Apple
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In a world where we're encouraged to prioritize individualism, and set boundaries, the importance of our relationships can often get lost. In this week's episode, Dr. Tracy chats with Dr. Stan Tatkin, a renowned clinician, researcher, and author of the bestselling book "Wired for Love." They explore the concept of interdependence in relationships, using the three-legged race analogy to highlight the importance of teamwork. Dr. Tatkin emphasizes understanding our own and our partner's brains to foster secure and functioning relationships, addressing the impact of negativity bias and the pitfalls of social media diagnoses. They touch on secure attachment, the couple bubble, and aligning on priorities for lasting connections. Dr. Tatkin shares insights on conflict resolution, mutual relief during disagreements, and maintaining a strong partnership through mutual sensitivity and understanding. This conversation offers practical advice and profound insights to help listeners build resilient and loving relationships, highlighting why it's actually ok to put your relationship at the top of the priority list. 
 
Be sure to follow Dr. Stan on Instagram and grab a copy of “Wired for Love” here.  

Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here! 

 A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible!
ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today.
Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use my code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% your order.
Cozy Earth - Use code SHRINK for 35% off at cozyearth.com

Links:
Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions! 
Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    
You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!   
Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop      
Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected  
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this week's mini session, Dr. Tracy is joined by Dr. Morgan Anderson to discuss the challenges of relationship repair through the lens of attachment styles. They explore how individuals with anxious attachment struggle with distance, often engaging in anxious pursuit and abandoning their own needs to regain a sense of safety. These individuals must learn to self-soothe, such as by taking a walk or doing a task, and become comfortable with discomfort. Whereas those with avoidant attachment deactivate their feelings and needs, pushing away closeness and often wanting to sweep conflicts under the rug. For the avoidantly attached individuals, the focus should be on self-soothing while learning to turn toward their partner, asking for reassurance, and setting clear boundaries. Both attachment styles face unique challenges in repairing relationships, but understanding and addressing these patterns can lead to healthier and more resilient connections.

Listen to full episode here:
Spotify
Apple

Follow Dr. Morgan Anderson on Instagram!
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this week's solo episode, Dr. Tracy tackles a topic that affects many of us but is also something that is very near and dear to her heart, and that is perfectionism. She explains how perfectionism is more than a desire to do well, often becoming a relentless pursuit of flawlessness that can harm our mental health and relationships. Dr. Tracy explores the internal and external roots of perfectionism and introduces the concept of urge surfing, a technique used to manage the impulse to be perfect. She shares five practical tips for managing perfectionism that have helped her: raising awareness, stepping into discomfort, practicing self-compassion, challenging negative self-talk, and embracing acceptance. Through her personal experiences and professional expertise, she aims to provide support to listeners in navigating their struggles with perfectionism to foster a healthier, more balanced life. 
 
Links:  
Download Dr. Tracy’s free guide to overcoming imposter syndrome at www.drtracyd.com/imposter 
If you are looking to find clarity in your business and want to sign up for the Empower Her retreat you can visit www.drtracyd.com/retreat 

 A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible!
ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today.
Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use my code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% your order.
Cozy Earth - Use code SHRINK for 35% off at cozyearth.com

Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here! 
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you dealing with a narcissist or someone with chronically defensive tendencies? In this session, Dr. Tracy and Dr. Jaime Zuckerman explore the key differences between a chronically defensive person (non-narcissist) and a full-blown narcissist. The session delves into the behavioral contrasts, highlighting that defensive partners lack malicious intent, whereas narcissists are often intentionally harmful. To wrap up, Dr. Tracy and Dr. Jaime offer insights on managing relationships with both non-narcissistic and narcissistic partners. 

Listen to full episode here:
Spotify
Apple

Follow Dr. Jaime on Instagram!
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices