75 episodes

The Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Podcast is to help women thrive after the devastating effects of trauma through narcissistic abuse. Hosted by Caroline Strawson, award winning Trauma Informed Coach & Therapist, founder of the Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme using a unique integration of tools such as EMDR, Brainspotting, Positive Psychology, Internal Family Systems, Breath Work and RTT, author (Divorce Became My Superpower) and speaker, this podcast is created to provide support, education and awareness around self healing, gaslighting, complex PTSD, codependency and surviving narcissistic abuse. This is a place where we understand the anger, toxicity and guilt you feel through the behaviours of a narcissist and this podcast is designed to help take you from trauma to transformation.

The Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Podcast Caroline Strawson

    • Education

The Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Podcast is to help women thrive after the devastating effects of trauma through narcissistic abuse. Hosted by Caroline Strawson, award winning Trauma Informed Coach & Therapist, founder of the Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme using a unique integration of tools such as EMDR, Brainspotting, Positive Psychology, Internal Family Systems, Breath Work and RTT, author (Divorce Became My Superpower) and speaker, this podcast is created to provide support, education and awareness around self healing, gaslighting, complex PTSD, codependency and surviving narcissistic abuse. This is a place where we understand the anger, toxicity and guilt you feel through the behaviours of a narcissist and this podcast is designed to help take you from trauma to transformation.

    074 When Your Friends & Family Tell You To Ignore The Narcissist

    074 When Your Friends & Family Tell You To Ignore The Narcissist

    Today I want to talk about something I went through when I was suffering narcissistic abuse, which is when your family and friends tell you to ignore the narcissist. As always, we’ll look at this from a trauma-informed lens. First, we’ll understand what is so triggering about receiving this kind of comments from our loved ones, and then what we can do to stop being triggered and avoid getting into unnecessary conflicts. 
    What You Will Learn In This Episode:
    - Why the phrase "just ignore them" triggers us so much
    - How hearing that from our loved ones makes us feel the need for validation
    - What kind of addiction narcissistic abuse creates
    - Why we must not feel shame or guilt for firing messages back at the narcissist
    We must recognise that healing from narcissistic abuse is not just doing affirmations and repeating "I'm good enough" every day. We have to perform deep work in our bodies because traumatic experiences are stored there. They get locked in our bodies and go directly into our fascia, deep into the visceral level and into our nervous system. 
    Resources:
    - Join my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme™ https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
    - Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse 
    - Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
    - My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

    • 18 min
    073 Why Does a Narcissist Lie?

    073 Why Does a Narcissist Lie?

    For those of us who have been victimised by a narcissist, knowing they are spreading lies about us can be really triggering. It might become worse when we see people around them believing their lies and turning into what we call flying monkeys. So in this episode, we'll unravel why narcissists feel this need to spread lies about us, why it triggers a response from us and what we can do to stop reacting to their lies.  
    What You Will Learn In This Episode:
    - Why narcissists continually, habitually and pathologically choose to lie
    - The link between the narcissist’s protector parts and their need to lie about us
    - If the trigger and the activation don't come from the lie per se, where they actually come from
    - How we can protect ourselves from being triggered by a narcissist's lies about us
    I used to suffer a lot because of my ex-husband's lies. I wasted tons of energy on two things I would never control - what he would say about me and what people would think when they heard that. Once I realised that, I started focusing and getting curious about what I had control over - my reaction to the lies and what protector part triggered my response. 
    Resources:
    - Join my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme™ https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
    - Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse 
    - Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
    - My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

    • 20 min
    072 Why Keeping Telling Your Narcissistic Abuse Story Can Keep You Stuck

    072 Why Keeping Telling Your Narcissistic Abuse Story Can Keep You Stuck

    This week, we will talk about the negative effects of keeping repeating your story over and over. Of course, all of us who went through narcissistic abuse want to be heard and validated, and that’s why we need to tell our story. However, from a neuroscience perspective, the more we keep telling our story of abuse, the more we are slowing down our healing process. Today, we will explore how our mind works and understand what happens in our body when we talk about our story of abuse, and what can help us to overcome this trauma. 
    What You Will Learn In This Episode:
    - Why repeating our story of abuse over and over makes our healing process slower
    - What Trauma Vortex is and how we get there
    - What happens in our body every time we relive our relationship with a narcissist
    - Why we must pay attention to the content we consume on the internet and on social media about narcissistic abuse
    Much of the content about narcissistic abuse we see on social media is about how terrible it is, whether it is made with humour through memes or actual stories. And it is awful indeed, but that kind of content focuses on the narcissist, on the abuse and, therefore, activates the negative feelings we had while enduring that abuse. The way I see it, our focus should be elsewhere - on our recovery, what we can learn about ourselves, and what we can use from it to grow and evolve. 
    Resources:
    - Join my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme™ https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
    - Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse 
    - Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
    - My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

    • 18 min
    071 The FREEZE Response of Narcissistic Abuse

    071 The FREEZE Response of Narcissistic Abuse

    If we think about our nervous system and how it responds to perceived danger, we could compare it to traffic lights. The green light is when things are relatively under control. The amber light is when some alarms are triggered, and our body gets ready to either fight or flight. The red light is when we go into the dorsal vagal shutdown - we go into freeze. 
    In this episode, we'll use this analogy to understand why we go into freeze mode staying in uncomfortable and painful situations, and then learn why we shouldn't judge ourselves for doing it.
    What You Will Learn In This Episode:
    - The three stages of our nervous system's response to the environment
    - Why we tend to stay in abusive relationships, even when they are excruciating
    - Why our brain thinks that sometimes freezing is the best choice for us
    It is crucial to understand that although we might feel depleted because of being in constant freeze mode, our brain is satisfied with its job. From the brain's point of view, we are still alive, it is mission accomplished. We must get curious about why some situations trigger our freeze response; that is our first step into healing. 
    Resources:
    - Join my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme™ https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
    - Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse 
    - Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
    - My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

    • 15 min
    070 The Shame of Narcissistic Abuse

    070 The Shame of Narcissistic Abuse

    Today, we will talk about the shame many of us feel for staying longer than we think we should have in an abusive relationship with a narcissist.
    In this show, my main focus is to understand before judging, to be compassionate before pointing fingers, and to take care of what we feel before wasting time on what others think of us. We will look at the reasons that made us stay in an abusive relationship from a trauma-informed lens, trying to understand our nervous system and why we behave the way we do.
    What You Will Learn In This Episode:
    - The link between my childhood traumas and me becoming a perfectionist and a people-pleasing person
    - Why meeting my ex-husband, a covert narcissist, felt like I had met Prince Charming
    - Why our brain thinks that it is better to stay with the narcissist than risk the unknown world
    When our protector parts are coming to the rescue, that means somehow our inner child wounds were triggered. Getting curious about what triggered them is crucial for our recovery. We can't change past events, but we can change our experience over those events and, most importantly, how we FEEL about those events. That is the beginning of our healing journey because those past traumatic experiences won't hurt us anymore. 
    Resources:
    - Join my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme™ https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
    - Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse 
    - Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
    - My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

    • 15 min
    069 The 10 Types of Narcissists

    069 The 10 Types of Narcissists

    In this episode, we will go through the different types of narcissists you can encounter. I will break down each of them, starting with the main types or the core four, and then going through the subtypes. I believe that talking about this subject will help you identify and get more clarity about the type of narcissist you may be dealing with in your life. 
    What You Will Learn In This Episode:
    - The four main types of narcissists, and the main differences between them
    - The three subtypes of narcissists that go hand in hand with each one of the core four
    - Why some subtypes of narcissists are so hard to spot
    These kinds of episodes are meant to help you put pieces together. They should help you have a clearer idea of the size of the problem you're dealing with, to start realising that none of what is happening to you is your fault. Narcissistic abuse happens TO you, not because of you. The sooner you get curious about the origin of your reactions to abuse, the closer you get to finding healing and closure. 
    Resources:
    - Join my Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme™ https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
    - Join my Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse 
    - Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
    - My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

    • 16 min

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