Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder‪?‬ Molly Stillman | Speaker, Author, Loud Laugher

In today’s episode, I’m joined by the remarkable Ryan George. Ryan is the author of the book, Hurt and Healed by the Church: Redemption and Reconstruction After Spiritual Abuse. 
He spent the first 20 years of his life in a cult, attending a series of independent fundamental Baptist (IFB) churches, including one where his dad was a pastor with ultimate authority. Later in life, Ryan was confronted with the devastating truth of his father's serial sexual abuse.
Despite the trauma he experienced, Ryan didn't abandon his faith. After leaving the spiritually abusive IFB movement, he embarked on a 25-year journey of reevaluation and reconstruction. Today, through his blog, books, interviews, and spiritual adventure company, Dude Group, Ryan offers hope for those navigating their own paths of healing. 
I do want to warn our listeners that this episode focuses on sensitive subjects like church hurt and sexual abuse. However, Ryan’s story is so powerful, and filled with hope, compassion, and healing. 

2:48 – Ryan 101
Oldest of six homeschooled children + a pastor’s son
Husband and adoptive father
Adventurer and blogger
Author of 3 books

6:51 – The Path To Healing 
Discovering his father’s abuse
Navigating the aftermath
Sharing his story to help others

18:16 – Jesus’ Model Of Justice
Jesus as a model for handling anger and betrayal
Pursuing justice with compassion
Seeking Heaven on Earth

33:31 – Finding The Real Jesus 
What identifies a cult from a healthy church environment 
Ryan’s experience with IFB churches
Seeking out the authentic Jesus 
Recognizing that churches have both moments of beauty and moments of failure

54:54 – Takeaways
Being the person that confesses first
Podcast recording stories
Connecting with Ryan

FEATURED QUOTES
"Wounds from relationships are only healed in relationships... And I think that wounds from the church can only be healed not necessarily in a church building, but by people who also love Jesus."
 
“Give people the gift of going second... You have to start with yourself, or it can spin in some very horrible places. You become a bomb thrower…. I want to be the person that confesses first, so that people go, ‘Oh, that’s the real thing.’”
 
Learn more about Ryan:
Instagram:
https://www.booksbyryan.com/
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/ryan.george
Ryan’s Website
https://www.booksbyryan.com/
Check out Ryan’s books:
https://www.booksbyryan.com/books/
Explorience:
https://explorience.org/about/
 
Connect with me: 
http://www.stillbeingmolly.com 
http://instagram.com/stillbeingmolly
http://instagram.com/canilaughpod
http://twitter.com/stillbeingmolly
http://facebook.com/stillbeingmolly
http://facebook.com/canilaughpod
http://tiktok.com/@stillbeingmolly

GET YOUR COPY of ‘IF I DON’T LAUGH, I’LL CRY” TODAY:
Barnes & Noble: https://bit.ly/IIDLICbn 
Amazon: https://amzn.to/48VYFkG 
ChristianBook: https://bit.ly/IIDLICcb 
Target: https://bit.ly/3Shh3Q2
Walmart: https://bit.ly/3MmGVpJ
Indie Bound: https://bit.ly/IIDLICib
Audible: https://amzn.to/3ITcdm8 
Kindle: https://amzn.to/3ITaSvv 

About Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder?
Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder? Podcast is a weekly podcast where we have honest conversations about faith, business, life, and everything in between. Hosted by speaker and author, Molly Stillman, her mission is to make you laugh, cry, and laugh till you cry. She wants to create a community of people who are unafraid to be themselves and have honest conversations about the things that matter most. Her vision is to create a safe space for people to explore their faith and share their stories and gifts with the world.

Melissa Kruger serves as the Vice President of Discipleship Programming at The Gospel Coalition. As an author and Bible teacher, she regularly teaches women in her community and speaks at conferences around the country.
I’m so excited to have her on the show today to talk about her latest book, Parenting with Hope: Raising Teens For Christ in a Secular Age, and dive into the ins and outs of raising teenagers. We talk about transitioning with your children as they grow, modeling a life of faith, creating a prayerful home, and so much more.
In a culture that often implies that the teenage years are miserable and difficult, Melissa encourages parents to not overlook the beauty and joy in this chapter. Whether you're a parent, teacher, or simply someone who influences young lives, this conversation is SO important, and I can’t wait for you to hear it!
2:00 – Melissa 101
Vice President of the Gospel Coalition Mother of 3 and wife Former math teacher An unexpected path to writing 16 books 6:42 – Changing The Parenting Narrative
The negative narrative surrounding parenting teenagers and tweens Understanding the development stages of this time period Being gracious and patient with teenagers + adapting your parenting style 14:21 – The Gracious Home Vs. The Permissive Home
Setting boundaries and allowing for mistakes A lack of structure leading to negative outcomes Setting boundaries as a parent Allowing children to face consequences in a safe and supportive environment 21:25 – Parenting Through Different Stages
Transitioning parenting styles from one stage to the next Recognizing children as independent human beings Walking alongside your children as they make their own decisions Avoiding placing your identity in your children’s actions or behaviors 33:03 – Modeling Faith
Being gracious with failure as a parent Setting the example by walking with God Incorporating prayer into everyday life as a family Connecting with Melissa FEATURED QUOTES
“I think growing up with our teen in some ways, is remaining curious about who they are and not making assumptions about why they're pushing back on something.”
“I think it's really tempting as a parent sometimes to place a lot of our identity and in our teen…we start trying to control who they become, rather than walk alongside them as they're becoming who God made them to be.”
“Learning how to make a mistake is actually a life lesson.”
“I always say aim for patterns, not perfection.”
 
Learn more about Melissa:
https://melissabkruger.com/
Get your copy of Parenting with Hope
https://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Hope-Raising-Christ-Secular-ebook/dp/B0CFTGDKJ1
The Gospel Coalition
https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/
 
Connect with me: 
http://www.stillbeingmolly.com
http://instagram.com/stillbeingmolly
http://instagram.com/canilaughpod
http://twitter.com/stillbeingmolly
http://facebook.com/stillbeingmolly
http://facebook.com/canilaughpod
http://tiktok.com/@stillbeingmolly
GET YOUR COPY of ‘IF I DON’T LAUGH, I’LL CRY” TODAY:
Barnes & Noble: https://bit.ly/IIDLICbn
Amazon: https://amzn.to/48VYFkG
ChristianBook: https://bit.ly/IIDLICcb
Target: https://bit.ly/3Shh3Q2
Walmart: https://bit.ly/3MmGVpJ
Indie Bound: https://bit.ly/IIDLICib
Audible: https://amzn.to/3ITcdm8
Kindle: https://amzn.to/3ITaSvv
 
About Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder?
Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder? Podcast is a weekly podcast where we have honest conversations about faith, business, life, and everything in between. Hosted by speaker and author, Molly Stillman, her mission is to make you laugh, cry, and laugh till you cry. She wants to create a community of people who are unafraid to be themselves and have honest conversations about the things that matter most. Her vision is to create a safe space for people to explore their faith and share their stories and gifts with the world.

My guest this week is the lovely Myquillyn Smith, also known as The Nester. She is a New York Times and Wall Street Journal best-selling author of Welcome Home and Cozy Minimalist Home. For over a decade, she has been encouraging women to embrace imperfections and live boldly in their spaces through her blog.
Myquillyn’s home in North Carolina has been featured in publications such as Better Homes and Gardens, Ladies Home Journal, Cottages and Bungalows, and more. As a practicing imperfectionist, she believes in the power of small changes, putting nail holes in the wall, and taking the time to make a place feel like home – even if you’re renting.
I thoroughly enjoyed getting to know her, hearing her perspective on creating a space you’ll love, and learning more about her latest book, House Rules, which is set to release on April 23rd. I just know you’re going to love her too!
3:07 – Myquillyn 101
Starting “The Nester” in 2007 Learning to build a home by moving frequently Teaching universal decorating truths 9:55 – Making a Home
The perfectly staged homes seen on social media Embracing imperfection in home decor Making your space feel like you 17:45 – Establishing Roots Where You Are
Taking ownership of your space, even in rentals or temporary spaces The perfect circumstance will never come The power of simple changes in home design 29:06 – Design Insights
The genesis of Myquillyn’s passion for decorating Understanding design principles like scale, contrast, and lighting The Inspiration behind Myquillyn’s book, House Rules 38:39 – Embracing Imperfection
Being a practicing imperfectionist Learning to take risks in home decor and life You can’t ruin something you already hate Connecting with Myquillyn + pre-ordering House Rules FEATURED QUOTES
“I’ve never met a home I haven’t loved. I believe every home has a silver lining.”
“I 100% believe it doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful.”
“Where else can we take a risk if not at home?”
Learn more about Myquillyn:
Pre-order House Rules:
https://www.amazon.com/House-Rules-Decorate-Every-Budget/dp/0800744748
The Nester
https://thenester.com/
The Nester podcast
https://thenester.com/podcast/
Myquillyn on Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/thenester/?hl=en
Connect with me: 
http://www.stillbeingmolly.com
http://instagram.com/stillbeingmolly
http://instagram.com/canilaughpod
http://twitter.com/stillbeingmolly
http://facebook.com/stillbeingmolly
http://facebook.com/canilaughpod
http://tiktok.com/@stillbeingmolly
GET YOUR COPY TODAY:
Barnes & Noble: https://bit.ly/IIDLICbn
Amazon: https://amzn.to/48VYFkG
ChristianBook: https://bit.ly/IIDLICcb
Target: https://bit.ly/3Shh3Q2
Walmart: https://bit.ly/3MmGVpJ
Indie Bound: https://bit.ly/IIDLICib
Audible: https://amzn.to/3ITcdm8
Kindle: https://amzn.to/3ITaSvv
About Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder?
Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder? Podcast is a weekly podcast where we have honest conversations about faith, business, life, and everything in between. Hosted by speaker and author, Molly Stillman, her mission is to make you laugh, cry, and laugh till you cry. She wants to create a community of people who are unafraid to be themselves and have honest conversations about the things that matter most. Her vision is to create a safe space for people to explore their faith and share their stories and gifts with the world.

My guest this week is the incredible Mattie Jackson Smith. Mattie is an author, podcaster, and speaker whose life took an unexpected turn when she tragically lost her 28-year-old husband to a traumatic brain injury just weeks before their first anniversary.
Her first book, Lemons on Friday, offers a raw and honest account of her journey through grief, providing solace and guidance to others navigating the lonely and difficult path of widowhood. Outside of her writing career, Mattie is the host of the podcast In Joy Life, where she encourages her listeners to choose joy in any season or circumstance.
We dive deep into Mattie’s story today as she transparently shares what it looked like to wrestle with God in life’s darkest moments, ask hard questions, and bring her hurt and doubts to Jesus. She has so many powerful things to say about finding God in the questions and navigating life after loss. I absolutely loved getting to spend time with her in this episode and know you will too!
2:21 – Mattie 101
Born and raised in Nashville in a country music family A passion for creative writing Owning a wine bar in Nashville Losing her husband after a brain injury Mattie’s memoir, Lemons on Friday 14:04 – Honesty in Grief
Sitting in anger with God Biblical examples of emotions and suffering Embracing your emotions instead of suppressing them 24:45 – Finding God in the Questions
Lamentations 3 How writing helped Mattie begin to heal God's invitation to bring our questions, doubts, and struggles to Him 36:09 – Navigating New Beginnings
The secondary losses that come with grief Redemption is not a replacement Navigating dating after experiencing loss Honoring the past while embracing the future Connecting with Mattie FEATURED QUOTES
“I lived my life and the worst thing I could have imagined happened. And through that God not only has worked miracles in me through the grief and healing process, but he fulfilled this desire that he planted in my heart at 19.”
“God not only can handle it but invites me to bring it to Him.”
“What I hope people see from my life is you do have agency to choose joy, even in the worst of the worst of it.”
Learn more about Mattie:
Get your copy of Lemons on Friday
https://www.amazon.com/Lemons-Friday-Trusting-Greatest-Heartbreak/dp/0785241272
In Joy Life podcast
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/in-joy-life-with-mattie-jackson/id1667357187
Mattie on Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/mattiejackson/?hl=en
Mattie on Facebook
https://www.facebook.com/mattiejacksonofficial/

Join me in this week's episode as I sit down with my dear friend and extraordinary human being, Kim Butler. Kim is the lead coach and founder of The Whiteboard Room, where she empowers creatives, leaders, and companies to unlock their true potential through one-on-one coaching, workshops, and speaking engagements.

With a heart fueled by faith, family, and a passion for adventure (and a Diet Dr. Pepper), Kim's coaching journey has touched countless lives, including my own. I’m thrilled to have her on the show to share more about her story, her mentoring process and what it looks like to set personal and professional goals and walk them out in faith. 

3:53 – Kim 101

Kim’s job at The Whiteboard Room Kim’s passion for helping people overcome obstacles and set goals Merging coaching and consulting The power of goal setting
8:25 – Following God’s Call

Life lessons from a desk job Inspiring people to see the best in themselves Kim’s journey to the world race Sitting with God’s silence
16:32 – In The Waiting

Sitting in the waiting Remaining faithful in God’s timing The careers that led Kim to where she is today
23:27 – The Creation of The Whiteboard Method

How Kim created The Whiteboard Method What Kim’s mentor process looks like Working in alignment with your life
32:04 – A Work in Progress

Real client stories Kim’s experience being Molly’s mentor The power of accountability Getting in touch with Kim
FEATURED QUOTES

“Goal setting became this like linchpin that I started to see, wow, there's so much power in this very simple thing. And nobody does it.”

“Your platform is not your purpose. It is just the place that you get to live out your purpose.”

“To know where you’re going and who you want to be, you have to know where you’ve been and who you are.”

Learn more about Kim and The Whiteboard Room:

https://www.thewhiteboardroom.com/

https://www.instagram.com/thewhiteboardroom/

https://www.facebook.com/THEWBROOM/

Connect with me: 

http://www.stillbeingmolly.com 

http://instagram.com/stillbeingmolly

http://instagram.com/canilaughpod

http://twitter.com/stillbeingmolly

http://facebook.com/stillbeingmolly

http://facebook.com/canilaughpod

http://tiktok.com/@stillbeingmolly

GET YOUR COPY TODAY:

Barnes & Noble: https://bit.ly/IIDLICbn 

Amazon: https://amzn.to/48VYFkG 

ChristianBook: https://bit.ly/IIDLICcb 

Target: https://bit.ly/3Shh3Q2

Walmart: https://bit.ly/3MmGVpJ

Indie Bound: https://bit.ly/IIDLICib

Audible: https://amzn.to/3ITcdm8 

Kindle: https://amzn.to/3ITaSvv 

About Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder?

Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder? Podcast is a weekly podcast where we have honest conversations about faith, business, life, and everything in between. Hosted by speaker and author, Molly Stillman, her mission is to make you laugh, cry, and laugh till you cry. She wants to create a community of people who are unafraid to be themselves and have honest conversations about the things that matter most. Her vision is to create a safe space for people to explore their faith and share their stories and gifts with the world.

The day is FINALLY here! Yesterday marked the official launch of my book, which means you can now purchase If I Don’t Laugh I’ll Cry everywhere books are sold!
To make this moment even more special, I'm joined by the one and only John Stillman in today’s episode. Although he didn’t prepare his interview questions (but don’t you worry- he never fails to prepare a joke or two) we had a blast reminiscing about the journey of bringing this book to life.
From the initial days of the writing process to receiving my first-ever feedback from early readers, every step of this adventure has been nothing short of incredible.
I want to extend a heartfelt thank you to each and every one of you who has supported me on this journey. Whether you've preordered the book, left a review, or simply shared in the excitement, your support means the world to me.
If you’re planning to get your hands on a copy soon, I can’t wait for you to read it!
Until next time, happy listening + happy reading!
0:11 – Presidents, Past Boyfriends & The Making of a Memoir
Selecting Millard Fillmore The boyfriend chapter The evolution of If I Don’t Laugh I’ll Cry 8:09 – … Now What?
A second book? Anticipation of reader feedback The publishing process Molly’s favorite chapter 14:32 – Chapter By Chapter
What it’s like to work with an editor Crafting an engaging narrative and chapter titles Where chapters of the book were written 21:07 – Completing the Book
The book’s content and structure The hardest chapters in the book to write John’s dialogue in the book The Dark Knight + Googling “racketeering” 29:16 – Final Thoughts
Positive feedback from male readers Designing the book cover Buying the book in person FEATURED QUOTES
“The initial idea was really just to tell a debt story... I think as I began to work on the outline I realized that more of that backstory needed to be included than I think I originally thought.”
“I think the thing I'm most looking forward to is hearing the stories of people who are reading it.”
“I can say, I'm not I'm not sick of myself. That sounds really weird to say, but I mean… I'm not sick of this book. Like, I'm not over it. I am more excited about it than ever. And I'm just genuinely excited for people to read it.”
Connect with me: 
http://www.stillbeingmolly.com
http://instagram.com/stillbeingmolly
http://instagram.com/canilaughpod
http://twitter.com/stillbeingmolly
http://facebook.com/stillbeingmolly
http://facebook.com/canilaughpod
http://tiktok.com/@stillbeingmolly
GET YOUR COPY TODAY:
Barnes & Noble: https://bit.ly/IIDLICbn
Amazon: https://amzn.to/48VYFkG
ChristianBook: https://bit.ly/IIDLICcb
Target: https://bit.ly/3Shh3Q2
Walmart: https://bit.ly/3MmGVpJ
Indie Bound: https://bit.ly/IIDLICib
Audible: https://amzn.to/3ITcdm8
Kindle: https://amzn.to/3ITaSvv
About Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder?
Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder? Podcast is a weekly podcast where we have honest conversations about faith, business, life, and everything in between. Hosted by speaker and author, Molly Stillman, her mission is to make you laugh, cry, and laugh till you cry. She wants to create a community of people who are unafraid to be themselves and have honest conversations about the things that matter most. Her vision is to create a safe space for people to explore their faith and share their stories and gifts with the world.