Reflection on the go Mirja Bang & Nina Albrektsen

Good morning and welcome to reflection on the go.
This is your morning reflection, and you can use it at home to make a good start of your day, or you can use it at work just before you start working, or you can listen to it on the way to work.
 
When you own the morning, you own the day. Therefore, your thoughts on the way to work are extremely important and can actually help you create a good day.
 
(The questions for reflection start 2.27 minutes into the audio file. Learn more about your posture on the Yoga Reflection 'Tadasana'.)
 
Approximately 95% of our thoughts run in circles. These are the same thoughts we thought an hour ago as well as yesterday and last week and last year - unless we do something about them.
 
And this is what we can do with the remaining 5% of our thoughts. This is when we are conscious of our thoughts.
 
When you decide what to think with your conscious mind, and when you repeat those thoughts over and over again, then you will begin to influence the 95% of your unconscious thoughts. 
 
Your new thoughts create new neuronal tracks in your brain, and therefore you can actually change the shape of your brain with your thoughts.
 
And your brain is connected to your body. Your thoughts will automatically affect your behaviour, as well as your body language, your tone of voice and your facial expressions.
You act as you think. And you become what you think.
A famous Henry Ford quote goes like this: "Whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right."
 
This morning reflection is meant to jump start your reflection – so you start the day with thoughts that will improve your day.
Use these questions to reflect on your day. Take your time, if you feel like reflecting carefully between each question.  You may stop the audio file after some of the questions. Sometimes one single question is enough for your entire morning commute.
 
You will know which questions that are most powerful for your situation, if you repeat the morning reflection a few times a week, and thereby become good at working consciously with your morning thoughts.
 
Questions for your Morning Reflection: 
Who would you like to make happy today?
What is your intention for the day?
What is important to you today?
What will you prioritize?
How will you prioritize?
What will you do a little differently today than you usually do?
What is the most important message to communicate today?
How do you want your voice to sound today?
What will you show with your body language today?  
If you want a technique to express strength, grounding and confidence with your posture, then listen to the Yoga reflection 'Tadasana'. 'Tadasana' means 'mountain' in Sanskrit. A mountain stands safely and upright and does not topple over in stormy weather.
 
Thank yourself for starting your day with your morning reflection. 
 
When you own the morning, you own the day.
 
I wish you a wonderful day.

Reflection between meetings. Be deliberate calm when you want
 
This is where you get concrete help to reflect between your meetings during the day.
 
Being able to switch to a calm state is an important tool to master, e.g. when you are in meetings and need your executive functions. You use your executive functions to control your behaviour under pressure. And you use them to create and maintain your overview.
 
Your breathing and thoughts can help you here. 
 
(Questions for reflection start 2.38 minutes into the audio-reflection. You can learn more about your breathing at Yoga-Reflection Pranayama.)
 
 
Here's a simple exercise you can use every day. The more you practice it, the better you get at it.
 
We start with your thoughts: Think about what you want instead of what you DON'T want. And repeat it. If you want to switch to a calm state, then think "I am calm. I am very calm. I keep calm. I enjoy being calm. etc." Be conscious and think at a calm pace - and continue doing it for a while.
 
Your brain probably thinks that it's a little weird at first, but keep on. Because, eventually it will start believing it. Remember Henry Ford's quote: "Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right."
 
It is your own choice whether you want to believe it or not. You decide if you want to believe.
 
While thinking calmly, then breathe. If you breathe quickly and shallowly, you start a chemical reaction in your brain that means alarm and you will start to panic a little. Your brain is getting ready to flee or to defend itself.
 
But when you instead breathe deeply and slowly, you start another chemical reaction in your brain where the opposite happens. Your brain thinks the danger is over and it calms down.
 
Then you have easier access to your executive functions. And you can control your anger, your anxiety or other emotions much more easily.
 
Practice makes perfect, and it is easier to train in peacetime than in wartime. Therefore, practice your ability to switch to a calm state every day, and start by becoming aware of your thoughts and your breathing.
 
Questions for your reflection:
 
• How does your breathing sound?
• Is it fast and shallow or slow and deep?
• What do you think your breathing is telling you?
• Are you tense or relaxed?
• If you are tense, where are you tense? The stomach, the shoulders, the head, the legs, the arms, the neck. Pay close attention to yourself for a moment.
• If your breathing is fast and shallow - or if you just feel tense and have difficulty listening to your breathing, then take a long, deep breath and exhale - slowly and through your nose. Repeat until your breathing becomes normal. When breathing is normalized, your nervous system is more balanced - and you have become calmer.
 
Think about the mood you would like to switch to.
 
• While calming your brain with your breathing, repeat the phrase with the mood you want to change to. And you can always start by repeating the thoughts: "I am calm."
 
If you would like to know more about your breathing and practice it more intensively, then listen to Yoga Reflection “Pranayama”.
 
I wish you a nice, focused and deliberate calm.

Reflection Between Meetings: Enter the meeting with curiosity and overview
 
This where you get concrete help to reflect between your meetings during the day.

I invite you to investigate 3 feelings in this audio-reflection. The one you have right now - before the meeting. Then the feeling you need during the meeting to meet your role and reach your goal, and lastly, I invite you to choose the most appropriate feeling for entering the meeting – your opening-feeling.
(The questions for reflection start 2,38 minutes into the audio file.)
 
When we are in meetings, our spoken words affect only a small part of what is actually communicated and perceived. Our body language, tone of voice, facial expressions, etc. take up at least as much space as our words, and they emerge from our emotions and feelings.
 
Inside the brain you have what we call mirror neurons - a kind of neurons that constantly read and mirror themselves in other people's brain cells. This is relatively new neuroscience; thus, we don't know much about the mirror neurons yet. But what we do know is that when you begin to discover your own and other people's feelings in a meeting room, your curiosity increases as well as your overview and your impact.
 
You can change your brain chemistry when you consciously change your thoughts and feelings. And that change is perceived by other people's mirror neurons. Usually unconsciously.
 
And remember that you own your feelings. You can never take responsibility for other people's feelings. And you cannot impose your own feelings on others.
 
Your feelings are messengers. When you discover a feeling, you can manage it. Undiscovered feelings are managing you - and this can be annoying if, for example, you are a bit anxious before a meeting.
 
You can't just get rid of an unpleasant feeling - it usually just becomes it stronger, when you try to stop it. Instead, you can accept it and replace it with another feeling.
 
If you don't know how to feel before a meeting, you can always start by being deliberately calm and curious. This starting point equips you to discover your own and other people's feelings more quickly.
 
 
Use the questions below to discover and adjust your feelings between meetings:
 
First feeling (now):
What are you feeling right now?  
Do you feel calm, uneasiness, anxiety, anger, joy, bitterness, thirst for revenge, admiration, desire to create something big, courage, and do you feel strong or weak...
 
Take a moment of awareness. Just 10 seconds of conscious attention can give you 
invaluable knowledge before a meeting. And remember that a feeling you have discovered, is a feeling that you can manage.
 
Notice your feeling and remember that it is a kind of messenger for you. What is the feeling trying to tell you?
 
Just take your time to identify it.
 
Feel free to pause the audio file and accept what you find. It is just a messenger.
 
 
Second feeling (in the meeting): 
Now we turn our focus to the meeting
 
Which meeting are you preparing for?What is your role in the meeting?How would you like to be perceived by the others in the meeting?What do you want them to think about you when the meeting is over?
Which emotion helps you here? Is it calm, strength? Do you need a non-judgmental approach and to be more curious? Maybe you need a little bit of anger or irritation to stand your ground. Do you need courage, joy, optimism, or perhaps some pessimism? What about humour? Do you normally use humour in your meetings? Does humour even fit into this meeting?  
Think about it for a while and figure out what you need.
 
Now lower your shoulders and breathe deeply while you choose the feeling that helps you the best in the meeting. (This is the feeling you chose a moment ago.) You can smile a little if you need joy and optimism. You can also pinch your eyes a bit if you need some anger. 
 
If you want to be curious and non-judgmental, and you need to know something before you deci

Between meetings - Fast reflection: Start your next meeting well - with curiosity and overview
 
Welcome to reflection on the go with 3 quick questions for entering your next meeting with curiosity and overview. 
 
The first seconds of every meeting can be crucial for the outcome of the entire meeting.
 
Therefore, it is a good idea to choose your appearance and style before you enter the room.
 
(The questions start 1,00 minute into the audio-reflection.)
 
The reflection no. 3 with the same title "On entering the meeting with curiosity and overview" is a more thorough reflection. 
 
This reflection (that you listen to right now) is for you when you have short time between your meetings and just need to tune in to be emotionally prepared for the next meeting. 
 
When you can manage your own feelings, it is also easier to cope with other people's feelings.
 
This approach makes it easier for you to keep the overview and increase your impact in the meeting.
 
 
Here are 3 questions for reflection before your next meeting:
 
Which meeting are you entering and what is your goal with the meeting?Which signals do you want to send in the meeting that fit your goal?Which mood will you show when you enter the meeting? Will you be calm, strong, open, focused on a specific area, irritated, optimistic, pessimistic, glad, or just neutral? 
Remember to stay curios about the emotions in the room. Both your own and the other people’s emotions.
 
Straighten your back, relax your shoulders, smile a discrete and calm smile - and repeat your mood in your thoughts on the way to the meeting: "I am ... and then you insert your choice of mood". Calm, brave, curious, happy, angry...
 
I wish you a good meeting.

Between meetings: Prepare for the difficult conversation
 
Difficult conversations worry many people. You do not know the outcome of the conversation, and chances that you will hurt another person, or be hurt yourself, are high.
 
(The questions for reflection start 1.22 minutes into the audio file.)
 
But you are in a workplace with different types of people - each with their own background and each with their own expectations for the future, so you cannot avoid disagreements. 
 
Disagreements are a condition. Neither good nor bad – just a condition.
 
Our brain is equipped with an ability to make ourselves the hero in our life. Therefore, you will often find that your counterpart believes that he or she has done exactly the right thing, even if you strongly disagree.
 
If you forget your own hero status for a moment, and make sure to be present and curious about the other person, you might get some nuances in your disagreement that can soften a potential conflict and maybe even find solutions that benefit both of you.
 
Therefore, start by changing the difficult conversation to the present conversation. Decide to be present, non-judgmental and curious.
 
 
Here are a number of questions you can use in preparation for the conversation:
 
What kind of image have you created of the person in front of you?What image would you like to have of him or her in the future?What image would you like him or her to have of you?
What is the problem and its consequences?Which goals will you set for solving the problem? 
What resources and strengths does he or she have?What has he or she done in the past that worked well - what experience might help here? 
What challenges do you foresee along the way and how will you handle them?If help is needed, who can possibly help here? 
How do you imagine the problem looks like if you are sitting in the other person's chair? Try to be empathetic. 
What makes the problem stronger – and what weakens the problem? 
How will you attend the meeting?How will you ensure that you listen actively so that the other person feels met? 
How can you reformulate the problem in order to contribute to make him or her be responsible for own thoughts and actions - and thus of his or her part of the problem? 
And remember to share that you are responsible for your thoughts and actions if you are part of the problem.
 
How can you together with him or her create a common goal for solving the problem?
 
What should each of you do after the conversation?How will you follow up?How will you ensure continued progress?I wish you a present conversation with a professional and curious approach to the situation.

On the way home: Come home without worries
 
This is a reflection and a visualisation to help you come home without your professional worries. 
Leaving your job-related worries at work helps you be present and happier when you get home.
 
The time between work and home is like a bridge from your professional role to your private role. It's your choice what you want to take over the bridge and what you want to leave at work for the next day. The more worries you leave behind at work, the easier it is to be present at home and have time for your family and friends – and also for yourself.
 
(The questions and visualization of your "home tour bridge" start 2.44 minutes into the audio file.)
 
This is NOT about neglecting the problems at work. It's about managing your thoughts and adapting them to your context – in this situation: your work and your home – these are two different contexts where you also need two different kinds of thought patterns.
 
The problems at work will not be solved faster or better if you take them home in your consciousness. Your subconsciousness, on the other hand, quietly works on them without you having to deliberately think about it. And very often the good idea or solution comes when you are NOT thinking consciously. You might find the solution in your morning shower, or right after you wake up and lie in bed for a while with fresh thoughts before getting up.
 
On brain scans, we can now measure that only a small part of the brain is in use when we think about a specific problem or a specific task. And when we relax – thinking about nothing special – a large part of the brain is active. Your creativity and your ability to find new solutions therefore have very good prerequisites when you relax.
 
Therefore, when you soon cross the bridge from your work to your private life, try to formulate a question for one of the problems from today, instead of letting the worries run in circles.
 
The more specific your question becomes, the easier it is for your brain to help you find a solution.
 
If you have transport from your work to your home, then it is obvious to reflect here. If you work at home, consider going for a walk for just five minutes or sitting with your bridge for a moment after turning off your computer. Just 10 seconds is better than 0 seconds.
 
 
Here are the questions for the reflection, along with a visualization of your "coming home bridge":
Imagine that you are standing in front of a bridge from your work to your private life.What concerns do you leave behind at work before crossing the bridge?You may say "Thank you for today" to the concerns and tell them you will get back to them tomorrow. They will not be forgotten. This approach immediately helps your brain to feel better, and then it is easier to let go of worries and step away from them. 
Choose a problem that you really want to solveFormulate a question for the problem - and ask yourself. You might say: "What can I do to solve a tiny part of the problem?" Sometimes a small part kick-starts the bigger solution. You can also ask for help, and begin by assessing who can help you: "Who should I talk to for help with...?" The more specific your questions are, the easier it is for your subconscious in your brain to help you.If you are alone, you can say it out loud now – if it is not appropriate to talk, then just ask in your thoughts.
Stand in front of your “coming home bridge”. Look at it and now ask your questions. Shake your shoulders a little so that your tensions fall to the ground and stay there – in front of the bridge. 
Take a step onto the bridge and stand for a while with relaxed shoulders as you reflect on the day. You are welcome to smile a little discreet smile - it starts such a lovely chemical reaction in your brain. 
What result - and even if it is a tiny little result - have you achieved today?What will you praise yourself for today?Which tools worked well today?Who did you like w