I'm Not Your Shrink Podcast Nation

In this week's mini session, Dr. Tracy is joined by Dr. Morgan Anderson to discuss the challenges of relationship repair through the lens of attachment styles. They explore how individuals with anxious attachment struggle with distance, often engaging in anxious pursuit and abandoning their own needs to regain a sense of safety. These individuals must learn to self-soothe, such as by taking a walk or doing a task, and become comfortable with discomfort. Whereas those with avoidant attachment deactivate their feelings and needs, pushing away closeness and often wanting to sweep conflicts under the rug. For the avoidantly attached individuals, the focus should be on self-soothing while learning to turn toward their partner, asking for reassurance, and setting clear boundaries. Both attachment styles face unique challenges in repairing relationships, but understanding and addressing these patterns can lead to healthier and more resilient connections.

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In this week's solo episode, Dr. Tracy tackles a topic that affects many of us but is also something that is very near and dear to her heart, and that is perfectionism. She explains how perfectionism is more than a desire to do well, often becoming a relentless pursuit of flawlessness that can harm our mental health and relationships. Dr. Tracy explores the internal and external roots of perfectionism and introduces the concept of urge surfing, a technique used to manage the impulse to be perfect. She shares five practical tips for managing perfectionism that have helped her: raising awareness, stepping into discomfort, practicing self-compassion, challenging negative self-talk, and embracing acceptance. Through her personal experiences and professional expertise, she aims to provide support to listeners in navigating their struggles with perfectionism to foster a healthier, more balanced life. 
 
Links:  
Download Dr. Tracy’s free guide to overcoming imposter syndrome at www.drtracyd.com/imposter 
If you are looking to find clarity in your business and want to sign up for the Empower Her retreat you can visit www.drtracyd.com/retreat 
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Are you dealing with a narcissist or someone with chronically defensive tendencies? In this session, Dr. Tracy and Dr. Jaime Zuckerman explore the key differences between a chronically defensive person (non-narcissist) and a full-blown narcissist. The session delves into the behavioral contrasts, highlighting that defensive partners lack malicious intent, whereas narcissists are often intentionally harmful. To wrap up, Dr. Tracy and Dr. Jaime offer insights on managing relationships with both non-narcissistic and narcissistic partners. 

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Did you know that 69% of divorces are initiated by women? In today’s episode, we’re going to gain insights on why this is the reality. Join Dr. Tracy and guest Kate Anthony, author and host of the Divorce Survival Guide podcast, as she shares her expertise on the pivotal decision many women grapple with: "Should I stay or should I go?" Having personally navigated an emotionally abusive marriage, Kate understands better than anybody the importance of creating a safe, supportive environment for children caught in the crossfire, the power toxicity holds, and why divorce doesn't ultimately "screw up" our children. She discusses the disproportionate emotional and domestic labor women often shoulder in heterosexual relationships and why women are left exhausted by the time they reach their breaking point. Kate also encourages women to reconnect with themselves in order to make empowered decisions moving forward in their lives. Tune in for a conversation filled with essential perspectives on nurturing healthier relationships and personal well-being. 
 
Be sure to follow Kate on Instagram, visit her website and listen to her podcast here! 

Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here! 

 A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible!
ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today.
Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use my code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% your order.
Cozy Earth - Use code SHRINK for 35% off at cozyearth.com

Links:
Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions! 
Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    
You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!   
Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop      
Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected  
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In this session, Dr. Tracy and Matthew Frey discuss a crucial issue that affects many relationships: defensiveness. They explore how defensiveness not only creates barriers but also diminishes and invalidates your partner's feelings. Matthew shares a personal revelation from his own life, noting how his failure to validate his wife's experiences contributed significantly to the deterioration of their marriage. He highlights that understanding doesn't require agreement but rather a mindful consideration of another's perspective. 

Listen to full episode here:
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Follow Matthew on Instagram!
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In this incredibly important episode, Dr. Tracy welcomes Dr. Frank Anderson, a renowned trauma expert and author to discuss the profound impact of trauma on personal development and well-being, as well as insights from his latest book, "To Be Loved: A Memoir of Truth, Trauma and Transformation," exploring the journey towards healing and forgiveness. The two kick things off by highlighting the importance of therapists sharing their vulnerabilities and human-ness to bridge the gap between them and their clients. Frank delves into how trauma is really just absorbed energy from our experiences with others and why that energy doesn't actually "belong" to us. They also touch on the power of forgiveness in healing trauma, emphasizing that it allows us to let go of negative emotions and see the humanity in others, including ourselves. This episode is a deep dive into understanding trauma’s role in shaping our lives and how embracing our true selves through healing can lead to profound transformations.  
 
Be sure to follow Dr. Frank on Instagram and grab a copy of his book here!  
 
Leave Dr. Tracy a voicemail here! 

 A special thank you to our incredible sponsors for making this show possible!
ZocDoc - Go to Zocdoc.com/INYS and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist today.
Loop - Visit loopearplugs.com and use my code LOOPXDRTRACY for 10% your order.
Cozy Earth - Use code SHRINK for 35% off at cozyearth.com

Links:
Ready to deepen your connection? Download my 100 Questions! 
Want your questions answered on the show? Submit them here!    
You can now order my new book “I Didn’t Sign Up for This” here!   
Ready to learn how to repair? Save now! Grab my REPAIR workshop      
Looking to improve your relationship? Join me in my online program, Be Connected  
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices