YTG Your Thought Guide

Making necessary changes to get to our place in life. Such changes can be well thought out and executed. At another time, change becomes unplanned and sudden.

The conventional wisdom is, look before leaping. In this instance there was no time to look or to think. The reality of the situation demanded a spontaneous reactive response with no room for contemplative thoughts. I looked; I saw and leaping into action was the solo requirement at that time.

As I sat in the parking lot of the eye doctor my thoughts came at me like a flood. I was reflecting about my father on the anniversary of his passing. I remembered that he had 2 eyeglasses which I never fully understood until it happened to me. Yep, I needed two pairs for divided vision. One for driving and another for the computer and for reading.

This talk was incidental and unplanned. Initially, my intention was just to sing into my digital recorder, one of my Favorite songs. It began with the song "the love inside" by my favorite singer, Barbara Streisand. That last note "Loving Me" left me haunting, wanting and then became a meaningful precursor this talk. Thoughts from an earlier interaction floated into my consciousness, and I began to speak. This became a natural outgrowth from that earlier encounter with a much younger and sorrowful individual.

On June 3rd 2020 I received a gentle reminder that my life clock was inching towards midnight.. My outdoor thermometer delivered the news through its digital display. It informed me that it was 65 degree outside and that I had just turned 65 years old. This seemingly innocuous  coincidence brought  a smile to my face and a chuckle to my heart. Turning 65 is, in it self, a big deal, a reminder that there may not be many more numbers left to count. This had me thinking about life, death and the passage of time.  My thoughts landed at the feet of George Floyd, who through no fault of his own, was allowed to die in the streets at the hands of a system that violated a sacred oath to serve and preserve. Some day we all will die and we may not have the choice of when and where, however to have that life destroyed by the action of failure, is indeed the tragedy.

This recording was done in 2016 while I was driving my 1994 Honda Delsol to Connecticut to see my brothers. It performed admirably that day and on all subsequent trips. As of today its current mileage is 143921 and still lights up by just a simple cracking  of the ignition. It is a two-seater with a responsive steering capable of making tight turns. My eldest daughter, Christine, drove it in high school, through college and first job in New York City. In 2014 she bought her own, returned the keys, and it became mine again..       

On that particular day I was gushing with admiration for its reliability and steady performance..   I love the sounds of the road, the feeling of excitement that accompanies the spinning wheels.   When making long trips alone, I  take my digital recorder  because I talk to my self. The  familiar hum of the engine along with the sounds of the open roads stimulate my thoughts and brings me comfort. I love to drive and driving this car is fun..

      On that particular trip I was thinking about this lovely individual I encountered. I am not the expert but  I do have mental health experience.  I felt compassion bubbling  up in my heart and flowing out through my imagination.. I began thinking about the mystery and dangers connected to hoarding. I thought about the unidentified hoarders among us and how their behavior is poorly understood by those "ordinary others".  

I hit "record" and  started talking.