Come and join our Incredible Conversation, a podcast for adults supporting young people, by clinical psychologists Jane Gilmour and Bettina Hohnen. We use the same principles we apply in our books (The Incredible Teenage Brain, 2019 and Incredible Conversations, due out in late 2021), first what is the science and second how can we use that science to change what we say or do when we are around young people. The science is current, the conversation is relatable and it will help unlock young people's potential. You can find more of our resources on our website https://incredibleconversation.com
Dealing with letdowns and disappointments
We are all dealing with disappointments as covid continues to impact on our lives. In episode 8 we take on this topic, answering questions from parents and teachers about how to help their young people cope with different situations.
We discuss ways to help the whole family manage a cancelled holiday (1:10) and how to respond to an angry 7 year old who has to cancel their own party despite a parent having promised it will happen (7:00).
We think about the upsetting news for an 11 year old that they will miss out on a longed-for group sleepover with best friends due to having to isolate (13:50).
A question from a parent about what to do with their boy who can do nothing but think about football, which is getting in the way of his studies (19:10) and how to manage our own and our teen boys embarrassment after he over-stepped the limit when drinking alcohol at a party (24:35).
Lastly offer some ideas and strategies for a parent feeling disappointed by their own response to a question sprung upon them by their child (30:05).
Having the hard conversations
At a time when parents are having to tackle the hard conversations, in this episode we do the same, helping parents work out how to walk the often difficult line required to be a parent.
A parent struggling with their 12 year old daughter bringing up the conversation of sexual harassment asks for guidance (1:30) .
We discuss how to recover after a child has been caught cheating (14:16), the tricky issue of what to do with a child who claims he no longer wants to live (22:55) and how to respond when you find out your child is sneaking sweets into their room to eat secretly (34:25).
Preparing for the teenage years
This week we have submitted the draft of our next book Incredible Conversations which is a resource for anyone supporting pre-teens, a place to have conversations and strengthen relationships. In line with that theme, we cover questions in the podcast from a group of teachers wanting to know top tips for preparing young people for the teenage years and how teachers and parents can help young people feel safe when there is so much uncertainty around in the Covid pandemic.
We consider how to find the balance between nurture and independence and the potential value of parents learning about what children need to grow up to be psychologically healthy. With covid impacting on so many, we discuss how teachers can support children with loss and trauma.
We end on a high with discussing the importance of mistakes, showing children we are all human and it’s potential to build resilience.
2021: Are We There Yet ?
Episode 5 includes a discussion of why teens may be vulnerable to extreme views on the internet (1:42), why toxic stress may be particularly harmful in adolescence but day to day stresses are beneficial (12:25). We figure out why teenagers who were managing their health condition well before puberty, suddenly seem to forget it all (19:42) and why living through COVID is a masterclass in tolerating uncertainty which will have advantages as well as losses (29:40).
School’s Out For Summer
Questions in this episode focus on learning. The discussion includes the impact of screen time on sleep, finding the Goldilocks spot with tech use, how we might support teenagers facing uncertainty in education prospects, and using the positives and negatives of lockdown to inform success in the new academic year.
Summer 2020 - The Same But Different
Bettina and Jane talk about the power of mentors to change teenagers’ behaviour, getting a reluctant teenager back out into the social world, supporting your teen’s passion with a cause like Black Lives Matter and how single parents might have been affected by the period of lockdown.
These are some of the most insightful people talking about parenting around. This REALLY helped me out. Recommending to all my friends and looking forward to more episodes!