Thoughty Auti - The Autism Podcast Thomas Henley

Is Dissociative Identity Disorder real and can people fake it? How does DID develop? How is DID related to BPD and PTSD?



@N0trixx is a dark trap artist and music producer seeking to share her stories to contribute to awareness of Dissociative Identity Disorder and mental illness. With a multitude of different creative talents, N0trixx not only dabbles in the dark side of life, but she’s also experienced it, which is reflected in her modeling, graphics, and of course… her music.



N0trixx Links - https://linktr.ee/n0trixx  // My Links - ⁠https://linktr.ee/thomashenleyUK⁠



Thomas starts off the episode by sharing his experience of once believing he had multiple identities, something he later understood as a product of Autistic Alexithymia. N0trixx gives us a brief overview of how Dissociative Identity Disorder can occur, before diving into the more relatable aspect of DID… dissociation. Thomas explains the two types of dissociation which are depersonalisation and derealisation, something very common to the autistic experience of shutdowns and even during moments of alcohol intoxication.



N0trixx takes us through her DID journey, starting at the earliest traumatic event in her teenage hood, and how her emotionally repressed home environment forced her to bury her negative emotions away. Shifts between DID alters were initially a well-oiled machine, but after years of repression of her ‘dark’ alter another traumatic event triggered a full switch. N0trixx was the identity that took control for the first time in a long time.



Originally a pragmatic and conscientious Wall Street investment banker with a well-established social network and family… N0trixx soon found herself deep within another woman’s life. Finding passion and drive in creative writing and music, something contrary to her other alters personality and skills. Leaving her successful job due to lacking the skills/knowledge required, she pursued her creative endeavors and started the N0trixx project to raise awareness of DID.



Throughout numerous attempts by family and friends to remedy her situation and dismiss her diagnosis… specialists and Doctors only confirmed her diagnosis of DID. The two end on speaking about the stigma around DID as a diagnosis, mainstream representation in films like ‘Split’, cases of using DID to avoid criminal charges, and alleged online ‘fakers’.



If you believe people are faking DID online, it’s either likely that they are doing so for their own recovery journey, want to raise awareness, or have a complex diagnosis of Munchausen’s Syndrome. It’s best not to air opinions on the legitimacy of their diagnosis unless you are a licensed professional with an awareness of their psychological records. You could be contributing towards a stigma that already impacts those with DID on daily basis, or be harassing someone with a variety of other complex issues and mental illness.



Whether you believe in DID or not, the two share some eye-opening facts and comparisons that may shift you to the former.



Song Of The Day (Listen Here) - ⁠https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5UDIyN5TSYN4zMcRoQPrG8?si=9255ed3480d840b5⁠

Interview me, 1:1 Autism coaching, public speaking for events, workplace training  - ⁠https://www.thomashenley.co.uk

How can you develop yourself as an autistic adult in a neurotypical world? Should you take advice from the general media or even close ones? How can you craft a life and persona that reflects your dreams or ideals?



Nathan Hall (@ThePhysioBox) is an ex-professional Taekwondo fighter, NHS high-security hospital ward worker, and physiotherapist based out of Manchester, UK. With a master's degree in strength and conditioning and a flair for lifestyle coaching, Nathan seeks to share his knowledge of sports with the world.



Nathan’s Website - ⁠https://www.thephysiobox.net/ // My Links - ⁠https://linktr.ee/thomashenleyUK⁠



This podcast episode is filled with useful lessons for Autistic adults who are struggling to move forward with their lives and manage the expectations of the neurotypical world held against them.



Nathan Hall describes his journey to an Autism and ADHD diagnosis in his early 30s, and the two bond over their mutual experiences with the world of martial arts. Nathan started his athletic journey at the young age of 5, quickly finding a special interest in the sport and an attraction to the merit-based social landscape of Taekwondo training and competition. He was a part of the 2nd cohort of professional Taekwondo fighters in the United Kingdom and received numerous decorated medals throughout his life.



The two contemplate the difficulty of understanding your traits as an individual with a dual diagnosis (AuDHD), and how these labels can be used as support from the medical system, but also a source of identity and validation for many people. Thomas raises how the social systems and norms in place can make it difficult to advocate for your needs and succeed in life as an autistic person.



Nathan is a big advocate for self-employment, touting the autistic experience of hyper-focussing on subjects of interest as a useful way to specialise within the working world. The conversation around the importance of knowing yourself and having a clear goal in life provided insight into how a growth mindset allows you to craft a life and an outward persona you feel best represents who you are.



They talk about managing relationships with neurotypical individuals, highlight the common phase of ‘hating neurotypicals’ that many autistic people experience due to negative school experiences… and also how the traps that come with trusting and assuming the best intentions can end badly. Thomas describes shades of grey involved with all aspects of life, and how rigid life outlooks or mottos can be very ineffective for the complex experience of life. 



They end on an inspirational and validating conversation about how socially set milestones, social expectations, and social media can warp your view of what you should be achieving at different ages in life. It can often feel suffocating, demoralising, and pressuring to fit into the molds others prescribe to us… often these can stop us from living life at our own pace and creating the beginning of our own success stories in life.



We see the athletes on the podium, hear the successful speakers/entrepreneurs, and get the impression their life has been perfect, with no lows, no boring/difficult months of training, and with general life success… but that’s not the case and it’s ok not be at your ‘peak’ now. Make small incremental changes over the long term and slowly traverse the mixed box of chocolates that is life.



Song Of The Day (Listen Here) - ⁠https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5UDIyN5TSYN4zMcRoQPrG8?si=9255ed3480d840b5⁠



Interview me, 1:1 Autism coaching, public speaking for events, workplace training  - ⁠https://www.thomashenley.co.uk

Can stimming be harmful? What are examples of Autistic stimming? Does everyone stim?

TW - Self-injury, Meltdowns

Lauren Melissa Ellzey (@Autienelle) is a popular Instagram influencer (85k followers), author and self-advocate focussing on autistic-centred coping strategies. With a neutral-positive attitude towards Autism, Autienelle hosts the yearly RED Instead Instagram livestream during World Autism Awareness Day which provides a space to those overwhelmed and saddened by media or campaigns propagated by certain Autism organisations.

Autienelle’s Website - https://laurenmelissaellzey.com/ // My Links - https://linktr.ee/thomashenleyUK

They kick off the episode diving into Autienelles RED Instead livestream event and quickly dive into the world of gaming. Autienelle talks about their new venture into the world of Twitch streaming, focusing on the game Stardew Valley and chatting about everything Autism.

Stimming is a repetitive, self-soothing action that receives a lot of stigma and shame from parents, professionals, autistic adults, and the wider online communities. Its primary use is for regulating emotion, be it positive or negative, and isn’t to be confused with sensory joy. Autienelle takes us through the 8 senses and offers different examples of autistic stimming, as well as combinations through multi-sensory stimming.

Thomas Henley and Lauren Melissa bond over their mutual love for vestibular (balance) and proprioceptive (body awareness) stimming, something that is very common, but not well known about. The two theorise about how autistic hypersensitivities and hyposensitivities may influence which stims people do to regulate, and which ones may provide sensory joy.

Under the surface, sensory systems are even more complex than just visual or just vestibular; each sense has different aspects to them, and different types of nerves for separate functions. The complexity of these systems and the individuality of each autistic person lend to a very different sensory profile but also preferred stimming methods.

Diving into the deep end, Thomas talks about his experience with harmful stimming and self-injury during his adolescence. Autienelle highlights the importance of being aware of or logging different stims that are common to each situation and emotional state. Understanding your stims can be an eye-opener for how autistic people express emotions externally, allowing others to focus on these signs rather than indirect communication like facial expressions, tonality and body language.

They end the podcast talking about the common reservations people have around stimming, whether it’s fear of attention, anxiety, learned suppression, or shame… but stimming can be big or small, and there are many options for stimming which can be used in public or private spaces.

Song Of The Day (Listen Here) - https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5UDIyN5TSYN4zMcRoQPrG8?si=9255ed3480d840b5

Interview me, 1:1 Autism coaching, public speaking for events, workplace training  - https://www.thomashenley.co.uk

Are emotions felt differently in Autistic people? What is Code Switching? Is logic superior to emotion?

Paul Micallef (Autism From The Inside) is a popular autistic creator, speaker, and coach on YouTube, recently becoming the largest Autism-related channel at 238k subscribers in March 2023. Born out of Melbourne Australia, he seeks to make Autism education and personal development more accessible to autistic individuals, their partners, parents, and professionals.

Paul’s Links - https://autismfromtheinside.com.au/ // My Links - https://linktr.ee/thomashenleyUK

Thomas starts the episode by diving into Paul’s history, making his mark on YouTube with a charity video where he shaved off his signature dreadlocks. Autism From The Inside explains the strange rise in social invitations, conversations, and connections during his dreadlock phase… the two share a similar experience, with Thomas’ story of improving his fashion sense, grooming, and physique.

Many autistic people believe logic is KING, especially when compared to seemingly illogical emotions. Thomas and Paul share that they tried to think their way into understanding the social/emotional aspects of life through careful observation from the sidelines… realising that many people do things that feel good, just for the sake of feeling good, and not necessarily following contemplation by weighing up the pros and cons!

Emotional needs are difficult to meet as an Autistic person, with Alexithymia, social issues, and a lack of cognitive empathy… it’s easy to see why we tend to focus on logic and ‘blanket approaches’ to dealing with negative emotion. The two agree that socialising is the primary way most humans go about managing complex emotions and events, making it difficult for autistic people to meet those needs independently.

Autism From The Inside explains the concept of Code Switching, whereby complex social interactions with neurotypicals can be navigated through learning about our cognitive/emotional differences and finding ways to relate to and socialise successfully with neurotypicals. Whilst navigating neurotypical communication is useful for daily life, workplaces, and socialising, Thomas highlights that there are a lot of situations where neurotypicals can and should meet us halfway.

Paul talks about the utility of fast emotional VS slow logical thinking, and how many autistic people will run into issues with executive functioning, social anxiety, and overwhelm when they don’t use their emotional brain for smaller tasks.

They end their podcast by speaking about the strange positive of Alexithymia in crisis situations, but also the issues when it comes to placing boundaries, building verbal trust, and navigating the social world.

Song Of The Day (Listen Here) - https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5UDIyN5TSYN4zMcRoQPrG8?si=9255ed3480d840b5

Interview me, 1:1 Autism coaching, public speaking for events, workplace training  - https://www.thomashenley.co.uk

How does Neurodiversity impact creativity? What negative life experiences come from DID, ADHD, Autism, and Dyslexia? Why does music have a positive effect on mental health?

TW: Mental illness, Loss, Addiction

The Neurodivergent Crew is a collection of four neurodivergent artists who seek to express their neurodivergence and life stories through music. N0trixx is a dark trap artist and producer, 12-Gage is a rap artist, FMA is a metal vocalist and Dreadnought is the man behind their beats.

In this special group episode, Thomas interviews these four guests about their life stories, their music background, and how creativity has brought a positive influence on their lives.

NDC Links - https://linktr.ee/neurodivergentcrew // My Links - https://linktr.ee/thomashenleyUK

Thomas starts off the episode by introducing the guests and diving into their music background: FMA used to perform live metal music on stage, but found that his son 12-Gage had taken a shine to rap music; they started living together and talk about their first father-son duo experience at 12-Gages young age of 15. A previous drummer, Dreadnought was introduced to the group whilst studying media at University, and N0trixx was the final piece in the puzzle. N0trixx contacted the triple over Instagram, instantly finding common ground and providing a production role to bring in the group's talents together.

Diving into their personal history, N0trixx explains the defining moment where her personality split in two through Dissociative Identity Disorder (sometimes incorrectly termed as multiple personalities). She explains how the stigma of the disorder separated her from her family and previous life, but also ignited her passion to share her more pessimistic and dark outlook on life… through music.

FMA talks about his experience with a very late Autism diagnosis, as well as his experience with addiction and rehabilitation through his 20s and 30s. His son 12-Gage, explains the impact that undiagnosed Dyslexia and bullying had on his school experience and his own self-confidence. He was fortunate to have FMA as a father figure, allowing him to dodge the addiction traps his father succumbed to in his youth. Thomas bonds with the two on this due to his history of alcoholism and exercise addiction.

Dreadnought opens up about his experiences with ADHD, stating that it was important to know for his own understanding, and not necessarily therapy. Plunging into deep mental illness and addiction following his friend's passing at University, he remarks on the existential loneliness he experienced at University.

With all the experiences discussed, they finish by talking about the impacts their individual neurodivergencies had on their music career in the present day. This is undoubtedly a big dive into Neurodiversity, as well as all the many strings that connect them together and what the crew to brought them into the music scene… I hope you enjoy it!

Song Of The Day (Listen Here) - https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5UDIyN5TSYN4zMcRoQPrG8?si=9255ed3480d840b5

Interview me, 1:1 Autism coaching, public speaking for events, workplace training  - https://www.thomashenley.co.uk

Why are Autistic people more likely to develop an Eating Disorder? What is Interoception and how does it link to Autism?

TW: Mental health and eating disorders

Livia Sara (@Livlabelfree) is a late-diagnosed Autistic coach, writer, and podcaster. Specialising in helping individuals reframe labels and identity to help them process and recover from their eating disorder. Liv has two books in the making, one being a Neurodivergent-focused cookbook 'Nourishing Neurodiversity' (released 21/02/23) for helping people nourish their body and mind in a simple and delicious way (see link.tree below).

Liv's Links - https://www.livlabelfree.com/links // My Links - https://linktr.ee/thomashenleyUK

Thomas kicks off the episode with a nod to Valentine's day before a swift transition to Liv's background; Livia opens up about her experiences with Anxiety, Depression, OCD, and Anorexia through her many years in and out of the medical system. She found that Autism was the missing element in her recovery journey, causing her to actively fight back against assumptions of 'Eating Disorder Behaviour' by ignorant Psychologists. 

Labels are a common topic within the Autism space, but Liv claims that labels around eating disorders can be restrictive on growth. Addiction becomes a habit and eventually a part of your identity, and once it's there it can be hard to separate from. Liv explains how her ED label was a source of certain comfort, a part of who she thought she was, and something that required a lot of uncomfortable change to distance herself from it and recover.

They talk about the issues around BMI, BMR, and Somatotypes in the medical and biological realms before moving on Autism and Eating Disorders. It seems that a few factors may be responsible for the high occurrence rates, Interoception, anxiety disorders, vagal nerve function, routine, aversion to change, literal interpretation, and ARFID (Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder).

Thomas and Liv debate the legitimacy of professionals without an open-minded approach, trust in clients, and input from lived experience. They talk about their own personal journies through healthcare, touching on the important qualities to look for in a good therapist, and leaving on some practical changes they would like to see in the future.

Song Of The Day (Listen Here) - https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5UDIyN5TSYN4zMcRoQPrG8?si=9255ed3480d840b5

Interview me, 1:1 Autism coaching, public speaking for events, workplace training  - https://www.thomashenley.co.uk