294. [PREMIUM BONUS] Unpacking Codependent Relationships with Melody Beattie For the Love Podcast with Jen Hatmaker - Premium
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- Personal Journals
Premium Pod Listeners! We’ve got a special episode just for you. We had the great pleasure of snagging an interview with one of the OG’s in the self-help, self-improvement, and dysfunctional relationships space—none other than the author of the massive bestseller Codependent No More, Melody Beattie. Awareness around mental health, trauma, dysfunctional family systems and more has been coming into the national awareness on a bigger level over the last 10 years But back in 1986, the concept of codependency was really new. And unless you were deep into studying sociology or psychology or seeing a therapist yourself back then (also something that wasn’t as widely accepted), Melody’s book gave words to the masses who never had a way to describe these types of relationships in their lives. Codependency can worm its way into our lives—the definition being those imbalanced relationships in our lives where one person enables another person’s self-destructive behavior (like addiction, immaturity, or even irresponsibility). It’s a bit insidious for those who don’t know what it looks like, and for so many, Melody’s book was a resource to help free themselves from something they may not have even recognized in their own lives—and 35 years later, it still is. Melody comes in with a scalpel to cut away to this very precise way of behaving and relating to another that is cloaked in good intentions and self-righteousness but is actually ruining our relationships. And fun fact, we were the very first podcast Melody has ever been on as a new edition of her book celebrating its 35 years of success became available this year. Melody and Jen walk through recognizing what codependency is and how it might be a part of your life and your relationships—which are the first important steps toward making an enormous change for the better.
Thought-Provoking Quotes
“Until I understood my codependency, I didn't really feel like I had a life. I was just responding to others wherever I went.” - Melody Beattie
“Codependency is being so obsessed with other people that that's all we can see and so out of touch with ourselves that we don't even see that anymore.” - Melody Beattie
“The key to codependency is the victim story. Somewhere underneath everything, there is a victim story and we're just simply writing the next page or the next chapter of it every time we interact with someone.” - Melody Beattie
“When we take care of a person in a way that we feel victimized by it, that is just keeping our victim story going. And that doesn't feel good. Although for many of us, it feels so comfortable.” - Melody Beattie
“Is it important to me to enjoy my life–not your life, not his life, not her life–to enjoy my life today and to love myself, at least as much as I love others?” - Melody Beattie
Melody’s Links
Website: https://melodybeattie.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/authormelodybeattie/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/writermelodybeattie/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/melodybeattie
Resources Mentioned in This Episode
For the Love episode with Dr. Brene Brown: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/getting-vulnerable-with-dr-bren%C3%A9-brown/id1258388821?i=1000391341377
Sharon Stone’s biography: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-beauty-of-living-twice-sharon-stone/1137456964
Connect with Jen!
Jen’s website: http://jenhatmaker.com/
Jen’s Instagram: https://instagram.com/jenhatmaker
Jen’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/jenHatmaker/
Jen’s Facebook: https://facebook.com/jenhatmaker
Jen’s YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/JenHatmaker?sub_confirmation=1
Premium Pod Listeners! We’ve got a special episode just for you. We had the great pleasure of snagging an interview with one of the OG’s in the self-help, self-improvement, and dysfunctional relationships space—none other than the author of the massive bestseller Codependent No More, Melody Beattie. Awareness around mental health, trauma, dysfunctional family systems and more has been coming into the national awareness on a bigger level over the last 10 years But back in 1986, the concept of codependency was really new. And unless you were deep into studying sociology or psychology or seeing a therapist yourself back then (also something that wasn’t as widely accepted), Melody’s book gave words to the masses who never had a way to describe these types of relationships in their lives. Codependency can worm its way into our lives—the definition being those imbalanced relationships in our lives where one person enables another person’s self-destructive behavior (like addiction, immaturity, or even irresponsibility). It’s a bit insidious for those who don’t know what it looks like, and for so many, Melody’s book was a resource to help free themselves from something they may not have even recognized in their own lives—and 35 years later, it still is. Melody comes in with a scalpel to cut away to this very precise way of behaving and relating to another that is cloaked in good intentions and self-righteousness but is actually ruining our relationships. And fun fact, we were the very first podcast Melody has ever been on as a new edition of her book celebrating its 35 years of success became available this year. Melody and Jen walk through recognizing what codependency is and how it might be a part of your life and your relationships—which are the first important steps toward making an enormous change for the better.
Thought-Provoking Quotes
“Until I understood my codependency, I didn't really feel like I had a life. I was just responding to others wherever I went.” - Melody Beattie
“Codependency is being so obsessed with other people that that's all we can see and so out of touch with ourselves that we don't even see that anymore.” - Melody Beattie
“The key to codependency is the victim story. Somewhere underneath everything, there is a victim story and we're just simply writing the next page or the next chapter of it every time we interact with someone.” - Melody Beattie
“When we take care of a person in a way that we feel victimized by it, that is just keeping our victim story going. And that doesn't feel good. Although for many of us, it feels so comfortable.” - Melody Beattie
“Is it important to me to enjoy my life–not your life, not his life, not her life–to enjoy my life today and to love myself, at least as much as I love others?” - Melody Beattie
Melody’s Links
Website: https://melodybeattie.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/authormelodybeattie/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/writermelodybeattie/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/melodybeattie
Resources Mentioned in This Episode
For the Love episode with Dr. Brene Brown: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/getting-vulnerable-with-dr-bren%C3%A9-brown/id1258388821?i=1000391341377
Sharon Stone’s biography: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-beauty-of-living-twice-sharon-stone/1137456964
Connect with Jen!
Jen’s website: http://jenhatmaker.com/
Jen’s Instagram: https://instagram.com/jenhatmaker
Jen’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/jenHatmaker/
Jen’s Facebook: https://facebook.com/jenhatmaker
Jen’s YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/JenHatmaker?sub_confirmation=1