4 - Be Worthy: Allowing the Good Stuff to Flow Plan Be

Full transcript available at: https://www.stephanieolegario.com/podcasts/plan-be/episodes/2148171118

Contact Stephanie here: hello@stephanieolegario.com

Summary:
Why is feeling worthy a problem? What happens as w result? What to do to feel more self-worth?

Highlights:
00:08:12

And it's just how could I allow the good stuff to come if I haven't done enough?

 

00:08:26

Am I seen as worthy? Do I seem to be seen as valuable so as a child if a 99 wasn't good enough. That means I wasn't worthy or deserving of praise or celebration.

 

00:09:25

You feel guilty when you start to feel like you have high self worth like.

 

00:10:00

Somebody is coming in and going, oh, I am worthy of, you know the universal abundance, riches and wealth and freedom, and all these things, and then people are like. Are you sure you are? I mean, there's so many people suffering in the world. Who are you? Who are you to say that? Right? So then you start to feel guilty for wanting more to allow good stuff to happen

 

00:11:13

Because we have to repay the debts of our parents. We have to give back to them. We're not deserving of their love because they've done more than we could ever ask them for to come here, and we have that in the back of our mind, right? So we will feel guilty if we start to give ourselves something good.

 

00:11:52

We feel guilty to have that opportunity because things have been handed to us a bit easier

 

00:12:57

So it's just who am I to receive this good thing when other people can't.

 

00:13:44

He would always want to remind me how lucky I was to have someone like him to stick around with a person like me.

 

00:14:48

Those toxic relationships really damage a person's self-esteem. Because if you're fortunate enough to get out of that toxic relationship. You're gonna come out broken. so battered, broken down. And then you're gonna look in that lens and be like, no, no one's gonna want me. And then we hold on to those toxic relationships because you start to believe it, because your self-worth is so low.

 

00:15:47

A parental figure making you feel like you're not deserving of love or not worthy of being a part of their life like you were a mistake.

 

00:16:18

I'm 6 years old. My mom and dad don't love me. They wish they never had me. How could a child recover from that?

 

00:18:44

I am very well reminded about all the things that people want to put on me. My labels.

 

00:21:11

I'm from Canada. I was born here, but, like just from my like, my ethnicity, my ancestry. I'm invisible.

 

00:22:46

How could a woman feel themselves as being worthy at an organization or a workplace. if they're not even regarded as equal

 

00:23:36

You're looking at me as if the woman is the best part to save money for your organization.

 

00:24:53

But like I've had some shit happen to me in all my workplaces because of my sexual orientation. It's no wonder I was always jumping in and out of the closet all the time, or just didn't feel like it was relevant for people to know and not standing around waving a flag, being very proud

 

00:26:04

How can a woman. you know, like a fem lesbian woman person of color, right? Feel some sort of self-worth when you're constantly bombarded with all of this. It's hard enough to be strong already given, you know, an upbringing that wasn't so great. But literally we're on a battlefield every day just trying to be. How could I even feel myself as being deserving of all these other things when it's so hard with, you know the childhood upbringing, feeling guilty for wanting more. You know, toxic relationships that just kick you to the curb and make you feel like shit. And then you have these societal influences of of people just treating you these ways because of all these labels.

 

00:28:01

What happens to you is that you really don't trust anything like you know that saying it's like, if it's too good to be true, it probably isn't. That's like literally yo