16 min
Chapter 6. Twisted Love – Finding Purpose in The Pain, One Adoptees Journey from Heartbreak to Hope and Healing, An Audible Memoir By Pamela A. Karanova Pamela A. Karanova
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- Mental Health
Trigger Warning // Physical Assault // Violence // Suicide
Now that I was no longer visiting the Rodriguez’s house, I had more free time on my hands most days. At this stage of my life, Patricia was still working the night shift, and when she was home, she slept all day. We rarely saw one another, but when we did, we fought consistently. My feelings of annoyance and unhappiness around her only increased. I was repulsed by her. I continued to ask her when I could find my birth mother, only to get the same response, “We don’t have enough money for an attorney, but when we do, we will try to get the closed records opened.” The less I had to be in Patricia’s presence, the better.
With Patricia working the night shift, I occasionally had friends over to party when she was at work. I would kick everyone out before she was supposed to get off, and sometimes I would leave myself. I was clearly out of control, and at 15 years old, I only had a few things on my mind, finding my birth mother, living up to the expectations of being bad, and partying hard.
This episode is also available as a blog post: http://pamelakaranova.com/2022/06/14/chapter-6-twisted-love-finding-purpose-in-the-pain-one-adoptees-journey-from-heartbreak-to-hope-and-healing-an-audible-memoir-by-pamela-a-karanova/
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Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pamela-karanova/message
Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pamela-karanova/support
Trigger Warning // Physical Assault // Violence // Suicide
Now that I was no longer visiting the Rodriguez’s house, I had more free time on my hands most days. At this stage of my life, Patricia was still working the night shift, and when she was home, she slept all day. We rarely saw one another, but when we did, we fought consistently. My feelings of annoyance and unhappiness around her only increased. I was repulsed by her. I continued to ask her when I could find my birth mother, only to get the same response, “We don’t have enough money for an attorney, but when we do, we will try to get the closed records opened.” The less I had to be in Patricia’s presence, the better.
With Patricia working the night shift, I occasionally had friends over to party when she was at work. I would kick everyone out before she was supposed to get off, and sometimes I would leave myself. I was clearly out of control, and at 15 years old, I only had a few things on my mind, finding my birth mother, living up to the expectations of being bad, and partying hard.
This episode is also available as a blog post: http://pamelakaranova.com/2022/06/14/chapter-6-twisted-love-finding-purpose-in-the-pain-one-adoptees-journey-from-heartbreak-to-hope-and-healing-an-audible-memoir-by-pamela-a-karanova/
---
Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pamela-karanova/message
Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pamela-karanova/support
16 min