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Ava (2020) – Dare Daniel Podcast Episode 88

“This is business.”

Derek and the Dominos cover band frontman Corky McDonnell and comedy understander Daniel Barnes confront Management with their review of the dreadful Ava. Jessica Chastain stars as the titular palindrome, a sensitive hitwoman confronting her tortured past. The film is vacuous and unoriginal without any real style or point-of-view, while a strong ensemble cast makes no effort.

Elsewhere, Daniel and Corky discuss port-a-potty church casino raves, TikTok assassinations and Joan Chen freak trains.

NEW DARE

Say It Isn’t So (Leo Logan)

AVA (2020) FACTS AND FIGURES

Daniel’s craft spirit: Gold River Distillery‘s Wheelhouse Malted Rice Whiskey

U.S. theatrical release date: Sept. 25, 2020

Worldwide box office: $3.3 million

Critics scores: 17 on Rotten Tomatoes; 39 on Metacritic

This week’s darer: Caroline Hostetler

IMDB synopsis: “Ava is a deadly assassin who works for a black ops organization, traveling the globe specializing in high profile hits. When a job goes dangerously wrong she is forced to fight for her own survival.”

This week’s referenced movies: Goodfellas; Hercules in New York; The New Mutants; Midnight Cowboy; The Wizard of Oz; There’s Something About Mary; Rollerball (2002); Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li; The Pawnbroker; The Illustrated Man; The Help; Tom Clancy’s Without Remorse; the John Wick franchise; Fantastic Four; The Saint; The Bourne Supremacy; Across the Universe; Trainspotting; Bad Moms; Rawhead Rex; Forrest Gump; Swamp Thing; Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner

Ratings: Daniel – Double Dare; Corky – Double Dare

CLIPS AND CLIPPINGS

Original theatrical trailer for Ava (2020)

Fountain fight

Ava vs. Management

Follow Dare Daniel on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Be sure to listen, rate, review and subscribe to the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Listen Notes, Stitcher, Google Podcasts, Castbox and more. New episodes come out every other Tuesday! Please help support the show by clicking the Donate button on the homepage and send us your movie dares. 

Read more of Daniel’s movie reviews at Dare Daniel and Rotten Tomatoes.

The New Mutants – Dare Daniel Podcast Episode 87

“Within all of us, there are at least two bores. One of those bores is this movie.”

Daniel and Corky put away their old mutants in anticipation of reviewing Josh Boone’s franchise non-starter, The New Mutants. A movie that no one wanted, The New Mutants suffered through a tortured post-production before getting a perfunctory pandemic release. Bland and pointless beyond belief, The New Mutants is two-thirds traumatic backstory monologues and one-third CGI-on-CGI fisticuffs. It wants to be so many things and ends up being absolutely nothing.

Elsewhere, Daniel and Corky discuss skeevy Slendermen, purple dragons, laser swords and fear bears.

NEW DARE

Ava (Caroline Hostetler)

THE NEW MUTANTS FACTS AND FIGURES

Daniel’s craft spirit: Patio 29 Twin Mischief Dark Rum (45% ABV)

U.S. theatrical release date: Aug. 28, 2020

Domestic box office: $23 million (production budget: $70-80 million)

Critics scores: 35 on Rotten Tomatoes; 43 on Metacritic

This week’s darer: Matt Barnes

Why did Matt dare Daniel and Corky to watch The New Mutants? “I saw this at the drive-in when indoor theaters were closed. It’s always hard to see what’s happening on the screen from inside my car, but I don’t think an indoor theater would have helped. This movie with several release dates features several different genres: Marvel action flick, horror flick, young adult romance flick, and succeeds at none of them.”

IMDB synopsis: “Five young mutants, just discovering their abilities while held in a secret facility against their will, fight to escape their past sins and save themselves.”

This week’s referenced movies: the X-Men franchise; Point Blank (1967); the John Wick movies; A Christmas Story 2; the Marvel Cinematic Universe; Hercules in New York; The Fault in Our Stars; The Breakfast Club; A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors; The Long Good Friday; It (2017); Sucker Punch; Watchmen; One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest; The Incredibles; 365 Days; Deep Blue Sea; The Wizard of Oz

Ratings: Daniel – Dare; Corky – Dare

CLIPS AND CLIPPINGS

Original theatrical trailer for The New Mutants

The first two minutes

Mutant truth or dare

Follow Dare Daniel on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Be sure to listen, rate, review and subscribe to the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Listen Notes, Stitcher, Google Podcasts, Castbox and more. New episodes come out every other Tuesday! Please help support the show by clicking the Donate button on the homepage and send us your movie dares. 

Hercules in New York – Dare Daniel Podcast Episode 86

“Hercules schmercules!”

Daniel and Corky descend from  Olympus to review the fish-out-of-water monkeyshines of Arthur Allan Seidelman’s Hercules in New York.

A movie seemingly devoid of second takes, this debut film for 22-year-old Arnold Schwarzenegger (née Strong) is a doggerel-filled, painfully unfunny, low-budget comedy set in Midnight Cowboy-era NYC.

Elsewhere, Daniel and Corky discuss cardboard thunderbolts, frenzied mandolins and Stang-provisation.

NEW DARE

The New Mutants (Matt Barnes)

HERCULES IN NEW YORK FACTS AND FIGURES

Daniel’s craft spirit: J.J. Pfister’s American Single Malt Whiskey (56% ABV)

Critics scores: 17 on Rotten Tomatoes; 23 on Metacritic

Theatrical release date: Feb. 25, 1970

This week’s darer: Michael Bagamery

IMDB synopsis: “Hercules is sent to Earth where he finds true love and starts a promising career in the bodybuilder business.”

This week’s referenced movies: X-Men movies; the Marvel Cinematic Universe; Pumping Iron; Love on a Leash; Juno; The Third Man; The Poseidon Adventure; Poltergeist; Wall Street; Citizen Kane; The Terminator; Midnight Cowboy; Sleepless in Seattle; The Nutty Professor (1996); Twins; Terminator 2: Judgment Day

Ratings: Daniel – Dare; Corky – Reverse Dare

CLIPS AND CLIPPINGS

Original theatrical trailer for Hercules in New York

“You have struck Hercules.”

Dubbed Hercules vs. Original Recipe

Follow Dare Daniel on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Be sure to listen, rate, review and subscribe to the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Listen Notes, Stitcher, Google Podcasts, Castbox and more. New episodes come out every other Tuesday! Please help support the show by clicking the Donate button on the homepage and send us your movie dares. 

Read more of Daniel’s movie reviews at Dare Daniel and Rotten Tomatoes.

Runaway (1984) – Dare Daniel Podcast Episode 85

“Now kiss your ass goodbye!”

Daniel and Corky don their electro-magnetic scatter-suits to review Tom Selleck as a robot-hating cop in Michael Crichton’s Runaway. A cliched cop movie with the tiniest sliver of a sci-fi twist, Runaway barrages you with wooden dialogue and hacky choices.

Elsewhere, Daniel and Corky discuss dense packs, Rebecca De Mornay comparisons, evil guy meetings and girder-bots.

NEW DARE

Savage Bees (Rebecca B.)

RUNAWAY (1984) FACTS AND FIGURES

Daniel’s craft spirit: New Alchemy Distilling‘s White Devil Whiskey (40% ABV)

Corky’s craft beer: Lead Dog Brewing‘s Who’s Gettin’ It? white stout (7% ABV)

U.S. theatrical release date: Dec. 14, 1984

Worldwide box office: $6.7 million (production budget: $8 million)

Critics scores: 50 on Rotten Tomatoes

This week’s darer: Johnny Flores

IMDB synopsis: “In the near future, a police officer specializes in malfunctioning robots. When a robot turns out to have been programmed to kill, he begins to uncover a homicidal plot to create killer robots…and his son becomes a target.”

This week’s referenced movies: The Wicker Man (2006); Batman (1989); Star Wars; Flashdance; Dirty Dancing; Staying Alive; Doctor Detroit; Reds; The Last Emperor; Runaway Train (1985); Cobra; Jurassic Park; the Police Academy movies; Backdraft 2; Vertigo; L.A. Confidential; Heartbeeps; Think Big; Swamp Thing; The Wizard of Oz; Grudge Match; Flight of the Navigator

Ratings: Daniel – Dare; Corky – Dare

CLIPS AND CLIPPINGS

Original theatrical trailer for Runaway (1984)

Tom Selleck vs. robot

Gene Simmons, king of the jump scare

Follow Dare Daniel on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Be sure to listen, rate, review and subscribe to the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Listen Notes, Stitcher, Google Podcasts, Castbox and more. New episodes come out every other Tuesday! Please help support the show by clicking the Donate button on the homepage and send us your movie dares. 

Read more of Daniel’s movie reviews at Dare Daniel and Rotten Tomatoes.

Foodfight! – Dare Daniel Podcast Episode 84

“My friends come out to creep.”

Marketropolis stock boys Daniel Barnes and Corky McDonnell use their dog-tective skills to investigate the rancid animated feature Foodfight!. With its horrifying, half-finished visuals and an ensemble cast of sex predator corporate mascots, Foodfight! provides a steady stream of nightmare fuel.

Elsewhere, Daniel and Corky discuss cartoon elephant torture, gay disco bats, Cinnamon Sleuth cereal and turd globs.

NEW DARE

Godzilla (1998) (Dean Longenecker)

FOODFIGHT! FACTS AND FIGURES

Corky and Daniel’s craft spirit: Legado Rye Whiskey

U.K. theatrical release date: June 15, 2012

Worldwide box office: $120,141 (production budget: $45-65 million)

This week’s darer: Charlie Sheen

Why did Charlie dare Daniel and Corky to watch Foodfight!? “Long-time fan, first-time caller. I don’t think you’ve ever done an animated film meant for children before. So why not subject your delicate sensibilities to the steaming pile of creamy excrement that is Foodfight!, an assault on the eyes and ears and souls of all who dare. Horrible looking, bad “jokes,” product placement galore. It’s a feast!”

IMDB synopsis: “The evil Brand X joins a supermarket that becomes a city after closing time.”

This week’s referenced movies: Kill Bill; Ferris Bueller’s Day Off; Holiday Engagement; Elvira: Mistress of the Dark; Love on a Leash; 365 Days; the Toy Story movies; Sausage Party; Torch Song Trilogy; the Indiana Jones movies; Casablanca; Men in Black; Requiem for a Dream; Theodore Rex; Caligula; Last Tango in Paris; Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS; The Exorcist; Johnny Mnemonic; 13 Assassins; The Wizard of Oz; The Graduate; The Conqueror; Meet Dave; Gone with the Wind; Total Recall; Soul; Ultraviolet; Robocop

Ratings: Daniel – Double Dare; Corky – Double Dare

CLIPS AND CLIPPINGS

Original theatrical trailer for Foodfight!

Brand X Invades Marketropolis

“You cold-farted itch!”

Daniel’s article about Legado Rye Whiskey

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The Conqueror – Dare Daniel Podcast Episode 83

“I am bereft of spit!”

Get your Geiger counters ready for this patently offensive episode of the Dare Daniel Podcast. Daniel and Corky review John Wayne in the role he was born to never play, Mongol leader Genghis Khan in The Conqueror.

Elsewhere, Daniel and Corky discuss dancing bears, tripping horses and the variety of ass spice.

NEW DARE

The Exorcist III (Christopher Reeves)

THE CONQUEROR FACTS AND FIGURES

Corky’s craft beer: Heretic Brewing’s Juicier Than Thou hazy IPA (6.5% ABV)

U.S. theatrical release date: Feb. 22, 1956

This week’s darer: David Paul

Why did David Paul dare Daniel and Corky to watch The Conqueror? “Trash is timeless, racist trash even more so. The Duke plays the scourge of the civilized world and greatest warrior in history, Genghis Khan. To me this film is the apogee of white supremacy in film casting. You guys are great at breaking down the politics of film, so this should be a treat.”

IMDB synopsis: “Mongol chief Temujin battles against Tartar armies and for the love of the Tartar princess Bortai. Temujin becomes the emperor Genghis Khan.”

This week’s referenced movies: Exorcist II: The Heretic; Superman; The Godfather; Deathtrap; Murder My Sweet; Jet Pilot; Johnny Mnemonic; 365 Days; The Warrior and the Sorceress; Aladdin; The Ten Commandments (1956); the Lord of the Rings films; Split Second; I Want to Live!; True Grit (1969)

Ratings: Daniel – Dare; Corky – Double Dare

CLIPS AND CLIPPINGS

Original theatrical trailer for The Conqueror

Temujin meets Bortai

Karger on Khan

Follow Dare Daniel on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Be sure to listen, rate, review and subscribe to the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Listen Notes, Stitcher, Google Podcasts, Castbox and more. New episodes come out every other Tuesday! Please help support the show by clicking the Donate button on the homepage and send us your movie dares. 

Read more of Daniel’s movie reviews at Dare Daniel and Rotten Tomatoes.