Other People's Shoes

Neil Matthews
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On my show, I intentionally create space for every voice and every point of view to be heard. Honest, constructive conversations have a way of opening our eyes to stories we might otherwise miss. After all, when you step into Other People’s Shoes, you gain what we’re all searching for… a different perspective on life.

  1. Bag Of Coal

    6D AGO

    Bag Of Coal

    🎙 BAG OF COAL 🚪 All season long, we’ve been standing at the door. Hearing the knock.Asking the question.Wondering who or what is waiting on the other side. Sometimes it’s opportunity.Sometimes it’s pain.Sometimes it’s a story you never saw coming. And sometimes… it’s a place you’ve never been before. This is the season finale of the Who’s There season. The final knock. The final door. 👣 GUEST INTRODUCTION For the first time in the history of Other People’s Shoes, we’re opening the door to West Virginia. When I first started this podcast, I had a goal: sit down with someone from every state in the United States. One story at a time. One pair of shoes at a time. Now, after years of conversations… we’re down to just one state left. But before we get there… this door had to open. And behind it is Vanessa Hankins. Vanessa is the host of Tri-State Time Machine, a storytelling podcast that uncovers the history, mystery, and unforgettable people of West Virginia, Ohio, and Kentucky one era at a time. But this conversation isn’t just about where she’s from……it’s about what she’s walked through. This episode is called A Bag of Coal. Because coal, under pressure, doesn’t stay coal. It becomes something entirely different. And Vanessa’s story is full of those moments the kind that feel heavy, overlooked, maybe even discarded at first… but over time, turn into something strong, something valuable… something that shines. As we close this season, maybe the question isn’t just who’s there? Maybe it’s… what has been there all along… waiting to be transformed? 💡 EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS Opening with a familiar song that feels like coming home The first-ever visit to West Virginia in show history The original 50-state goal and being just one story away What pressure reveals about who we really are Why some of life’s heaviest moments carry hidden value The power of storytelling to connect past, present, and purpose Seeing your own “bag of coal” in a new way 🔗 CONNECT WITH VANESSA HANKINS 🎧 Podcast: Tri-State Time Machinehttps://feeds.captivate.fm/ts-time-machine/?fbclid=IwY2xjawRcxXZleHRuA2FlbQIxMABicmlkETFhV0NCR204SWJvaDBMT3Nyc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQQMjIyMDM5MTc4ODIwMDg5MgABHn72b6hRBQ55OTDW1S4Xg-xjt3Bk45iU8oru5j0hERrOHwN4B4JfEDfZAtzh_aem_CKR18phH8kzat9JLcoseLA 📸 Instagramhttps://www.instagram.com/tristatetimemachine/ 🎧 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES 🩵 Instagram 👍 Facebook 🐦 X (Twitter) 📺 YouTube 👟 Website 📣 LEAVE US A REVIEW If this season finale made you stop, reflect, or see your own story a little differently don’t keep that to yourself. 👉 Leave a review and let us know…

    46 min
  2. What IF...

    APR 22

    What IF...

    🎙WHAT IF... 🚪 This season leans into the moments when life knocks quietly or loudly and asks a simple question: are you there to answer? It’s about presence. Awareness. And what happens when we stop missing the moments right in front of us. 👣 GUEST INTRODUCTION: Today, you’re stepping into the shoes of Jon Sheldon. Jon is a leadership, growth, and small unit coach who works with high-performers helping them lead with authenticity, stay aligned with what actually matters, and build sustainable systems for growth. His journey started as a Marine squad leader and carried into the world of Fortune 500 sales, where pressure, discipline, and resilience weren’t optional… they were required. Now, Jon brings that same clarity into his coaching grounded in stoic calm, radical honesty, and a belief that real growth starts when you stop avoiding the truth and start owning it. This conversation asks a simple but uncomfortable question:What if we actually showed up for our lives? 💡 EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS: What success really looks like when you strip away the noise? The difference between “Now” and “Next” what does that mean? Why presence is harder and more important than ever? Why giving yourself grace for the past without letting it define your future? How stepping back can actually launch you forward? The cost of distraction… and what it’s quietly stealing from your life? 🔗 CONNECT WITH JON SHELDON: 🌐 Website: https://www.belleauwood.coach/ 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/belleauWood_Coaching 🎧 OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES: 🩵 Instagram 👍 Facebook 🐦 X (Twitter) 📺 YouTube 👟 Website 📣 LEAVE US A REVIEW: If this episode made you pause… think… or maybe even put your phone down for a second—don’t keep that to yourself. 👉 Leave a review and let us know what hit home for you. Because sometimes the biggest question isn’t what if… It’s why not now?

    44 min
  3. Little Mermaid

    APR 15

    Little Mermaid

    🎙 LITTLE MERMAID…PART OF THAT WORLD 🚪  There’s a knock at the door. Not loud. Not forced. Just steady. Patient.This season is about learning to recognize that sound… and having the courage to answer it. 📖 A KNOCK WORTH ANSWERING “Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear my voice and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal together as friends.”  Revelation Sometimes the voice we’re searching for… has been right outside the door all along. For me, this verse is simple but powerful Jesus doesn’t force His way in. He knocks. He waits. He invites. Now here’s where this episode gets real… Lauren may not see that the same way. And that’s okay. This isn’t about agreeing on everything it’s about stepping into someone else’s shoes long enough to understand how they see the world. And maybe that’s part of the message too… not just hearing the knock but how we respond to the people on the other side of the door. And here’s the tension we wrestle with in this episode: "Out of 100 men, one will read the Bible, the other 99 will read the Christian." Dwight L. Moody What does your life say… before you ever say a word? 👣 GUEST INTRODUCTION: LAUREN PEARLINGI Lauren Pearlingi lives in that space where healing meets identity. Her work isn’t surface-level it goes deep into the parts of our story we’ve either buried, avoided, or misunderstood. As an Intuitive Human Design Business Guide, Trauma Healer, Theta Reiki Master, Meditation Coach, Author, Motivational Speaker, and Shamanic Practitioner, Lauren helps women untangle complex trauma and step back into who they were always meant to be. Her approach blends energy work with grounded, practical insight helping people move from feeling stuck in their past… to standing confidently in their purpose. Through her work with The Mermaid Light, Lauren invites people to see their lives differently not as something that happened to them, but something they can understand, hold, and ultimately transform. This conversation feels a lot like Ariel standing at the edge of two worlds… asking, “Where do I belong?” 💡 EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS Did we get Jesus’ message wrong? What do you think of intuitive people? What does it mean to be an observer of your story like placing it on a shelf? What is the emotional attachment to your story? What does it mean to bring your story back in… off the shelf? 🔗 CONNECT WITH LAUREN PEARLINGI TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@themermaidlight   🎧 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES 🩵 Instagram 👍 Facebook 🐦 X (Twitter) 📺 YouTube 👟 Website 📣 LEAVE US A REVIEW If this episode made you think… pause… or maybe even hear a knock you’ve been ignoring don’t keep that to yourself.Leave a review and let us know what part of the story stayed with you. 🚪 FINAL THOUGHT Some doors don’t need to be forced open.They just need to be answered.

    40 min
  4. Fix It

    APR 8

    Fix It

    🎙 FIX IT 🚪 Every knock carries a moment… a decision… a person… or a truth we didn’t see coming.This season is about answering the door especially when what’s on the other side feels uncomfortable, uncertain… or completely unfixable. 👣 GUEST INTRODUCTION: What do you do when something breaks… and you can’t just fix it? Not with a quick apology.Not with time alone.Not with pretending it didn’t happen. This week, I’m joined by Dr. Bruce Chalmer a psychologist who’s spent over 30 years helping couples navigate conflict, betrayal, and the moments when everything feels like it’s falling apart. Early in his career, someone asked him how he does couples therapy. His answer? “Be kind. Don’t panic.”And later… he added a third piece:“Have faith.” Seven words that sound simple… until life puts them to the test. Because when betrayal enters the room when trust is broken, when someone crosses a line you can’t unsee the instinct is to fix it. Fast. But what if fixing it isn’t the first step?What if the real work is understanding what actually happened… and what it means now? In his book Betrayal and Forgiveness: How to Navigate the Turmoil and Learn to Trust Again, Dr. Chalmer walks through the emotional aftermath of betrayal and what it takes to move forward with clarity instead of panic. And through his podcast Couples Therapy in Seven Words, he brings those same ideas into real, honest conversations about intimacy, conflict, and connection grounded in both experience and everyday life. Can trust be rebuilt?Should it be?And is forgiveness something you choose… or something you grow into? Sometimes the knock at the door isn’t asking to be fixed.Sometimes it’s asking to be faced. 💡 EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS: 🧠 The three steps to forgiveness and how they play out in real relationships 🧩 The deeper meaning behind “Be kind, don’t panic, have faith” 💔 A real look at whether you can truly forgive deep betrayal ⚖️ When forgiveness is right… and when it might not be 🔍 How to learn to trust yourself again after being hurt 🔄 What moving forward actually looks like together or apart 🔗 CONNECT WITH DR. BRUCE CHALMER: 🌐 Website: https://brucechalmer.com/🎙 Podcast: https://couplestherapyinsevenwords.com/📚 Book: https://www.amazon.com/Betrayal-Forgiveness-Navigate-Turmoil-Learn/dp/B0D4R8HFHS/ref=sr_1_3 🎧 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES: 🩵 Instagram 👍 Facebook 🐦 X (Twitter) 📺 YouTube 👟 Website 📣 LEAVE US A REVIEW: If this episode made you pause and rethink what it really means to “fix” something or whether everything even can be fixed don’t keep that to yourself.Leave a review and let us know what stood out after stepping into Dr. Chalmer’s shoes.

    41 min
  5. SECRET

    APR 1

    SECRET

    🎙 SECRET ⚠️ LISTENER DISCRETION ADVISEDThis episode contains mature themes and honest conversations around sex and intimacy. Recommended for adult listeners. 🧩 WHO’S THERE? 🚪 Every knock carries a moment… a decision… a person… or even a conversation we weren’t ready to have. Some doors we open with curiosity.Others… we avoid altogether. This episode?It’s one of those doors. 👣 GUEST INTRODUCTION I was 11 years old when the song Let's Talk About Sex came out by Color Me Badd. And if you grew up in the late 80s or early 90s, you probably remember what “the talk” looked like back then… awkward health class lessons, uncomfortable silence, and a whole lot left unsaid. We learned just enough to be confused…but not enough to truly understand connection, intimacy, or even ourselves. Fast forward to today, and we’re still carrying some of those same questions… just in adult bodies. That’s where my guest, Xanet Pailet, comes in. Xanet is a nationally recognized sexuality educator, coach, and bestselling author of Living an Orgasmic Life. Her story is powerful. She spent over two decades in a sexless marriage… before experiencing a complete personal awakening that changed everything. Today, she helps people reconnect with their bodies, their desires, and something many of us have forgotten… that pleasure isn’t something to earn. It’s something we’re born with. 💡 EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS What it’s really like to live in a sexless marriage for 26 years How early beliefs about sex shape our adult relationships The difference between physical intimacy and emotional connection Disconnection and addiction Learning to feel again What do I really believe about sex? 🔗 CONNECT WITH XANET PAILET Website: https://www.passionateintimacyretreats.com/Quiz: https://www.passionateintimacyretreats.com/quiz/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/xanetpop/ 🎧 LISTEN & FOLLOW OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES 🩵 Instagram 👍 Facebook 🐦 X (Twitter) 📺 YouTube 👟 Website 📣 LEAVE US A REVIEW If this episode made you think… challenged something you’ve always believed… or opened a door you didn’t even realize was closed— Don’t keep that to yourself. Leave a review and let me know what this conversation meant to you. 🔥 EPISODE SUMMARY This week on Other People’s Shoes, we walk into a conversation many of us were never taught how to have. From awkward middle school memories to deeply personal adult experiences, this episode explores what happens when we finally face the topic of sex, intimacy, and connection head on. With honesty, vulnerability, and zero fluff, Xanet Pailet shares her journey from disconnection to awakening… and challenges us to rethink everything we thought we knew about pleasure, relationships, and ourselves. Because sometimes…the door we avoid the most… is the one that leads to healing.

    48 min
  6. Stutter

    MAR 25

    Stutter

    🎙 STUTTER  🚪 🧩 WHO’S THERE? 🚪Every knock carries a moment… a decision… a voice we either trust or try to hide.This season is about answering the door… even when what’s on the other side scares you.  🚪 👣 GUEST INTRODUCTION:What if the voice you’ve been trying to hide… is the very thing meant to be heard? For Byron Athene, a stutter wasn’t just something he dealt with it became part of how he saw himself. It shaped his confidence, his choices, and the path he believed was available to him. So even though he was drawn to philosophy and psychology, he convinced himself that becoming a therapist wasn’t realistic. His voice, in his mind, disqualified him. So he stayed safe. For over two decades, Byron worked in office roles, keeping that deeper calling at a distance. But the knock never stopped. Over time, something began to shift. What if the limitation wasn’t his speech… but the belief attached to it?What if the story he told himself… wasn’t true? That question changed everything. Today, Byron is a counselling psychotherapist, certified mindset coach, clinical supervisor, and author helping others move past limiting beliefs and step into a greater sense of freedom, purpose, and fulfillment.  🚪 This conversation isn’t just about a stutter…It’s about finding your voice. 💡 EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS: 🗣 Living with a stutter and how it shapes identity 😶 Avoiding conversations—and opportunities—because of fear 🛑 Why Byron didn’t pursue therapy earlier in life 🧠 Fixed mindset vs. growth mindset in real life 🔄 How one belief can redirect your entire life ✨ “We are perfect… unless we focus on our imperfections” 🎤 Letting go of what others think and reclaiming your voice 🔥 “You can hate them… but that won’t affect my enjoyment of them” 🌱 Helping others access freedom, fulfillment, and inner growth  🚪 🔗 CONNECT WITH BYRON ATHENE:Website: https://www.byronathene.com/  🚪 🎧 OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES LINKS:🩵 Instagram👍 Facebook🐦 X (Twitter)📺 YouTube👟 Website  🚪 💭 FINAL THOUGHT: We spend so much of our lives focusing on what’s “wrong” with us…the hesitation, the flaw, the thing we wish we could fix. But what if that’s not the thing holding us back? What if it’s the meaning we’ve attached to it? So here’s the question… Are you letting your voice be heard…or are you still believing the story that it’s not enough?  🚪 📣 LEAVE US A REVIEW:If this episode made you think about your own voice… or challenged the story you’ve been telling yourself, don’t keep that to yourself.Leave a review and let us know how this conversation impacted you.

    38 min
  7. Goodbye

    MAR 18

    Goodbye

    🎙 GOODBYE   🧩 WHO’S THERE? 🚪 Every knock carries a moment… a decision… a person… or a goodbye we didn’t see coming.This season is about answering the door before it’s too late. 👣 GUEST INTRODUCTION: What is so good about goodbye? The word itself didn’t start the way we use it today. Back in the late 1500s, “goodbye” was actually a blessing short for “God be with you.” Over time, it softened, shifted, and lost its original weight… but maybe it wasn’t supposed to. Because when you really think about it… Goodbye isn’t just a word.It’s a moment. This week, I’m joined by Kelly Weaver, and her story brings that truth front and center. She has stood at the edge of life—on death’s doorstep and come back. After walking through ovarian cancer, widowhood, raising a daughter with autism as a single parent, and a life-altering illness, Kelly understands something most of us try to avoid: We don’t always get to choose when the last goodbye happens. Now, as an identity life coach, she helps high-achieving women over 50 rediscover who they are after retirement and major life transitions. But what she really offers is deeper than that clarity, perspective, and a reminder that life doesn’t end… it evolves. This conversation isn’t just about endings…It’s about being ready for them. 💡 EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS: The true origin and deeper meaning behind the word “goodbye.” Why do we often take our final moments with people for granted What it means to experience restoration, peace, and clarity Kelly’s powerful story of survival, loss, and reinvention The uncomfortable but necessary question: Are you ready to say goodbye? Why saving money and preparing for retirement is more emotional than financial How to step into your next chapter with purpose and intention 🔗 CONNECT WITH KELLY WEAVER: Website: https://kellyweaverconsulting.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kelly_weaver_consulting 🎧 OTHER PEOPLE’S SHOES LINKS: 🩵 Instagram 👍 Facebook 🐦 X (Twitter) 📺 YouTube 👟 Website 📣 LEAVE US A REVIEW: If this episode made you pause… reflect… or think about the people in your life a little differently, don’t keep that to yourself.Leave a review and let us know how this conversation impacted you. 💭 FINAL THOUGHT: Inspired by The Breath You Take by George Strait… Life isn’t just about breathing in and out.It’s about the moments that take your breath away. So here’s the question… If today were the moment, would your goodbye say everything it needs to? 🚪

    41 min
  8. SMS

    MAR 11

    SMS

    🎙  SMS 🚪 Who’s There? 🚪 This season explores the moments when life knocks on our door. Sometimes the knock is quiet. Sometimes it’s loud enough to shake everything we thought we knew. “Who’s There?” is about those moments that stop us in our tracks and force us to answer the door to truth, change, and responsibility. 👣 Guest Introduction: Dave Booth How many of us have sent a text while driving?Or remember the days before Bluetooth when we held our phones up to our ear while cruising down the road? If I’m being honest… I struggle with a phone addiction. It’s easy to joke about. Easy to brush off. But the question that sits heavy on my mind is this: Could one text message cost someone their life? That message you just have to send.That song you feel like you have to hear right now.That quick glance down at the screen. Today’s guest, Dave Booth, knows exactly how dangerous that moment can be. Dave was sitting in backed-up traffic when everything changed. A teenage driver, distracted behind the wheel, slammed into him at roughly 75 miles per hour while Dave was traveling about 35 mph. In a split second, life became a before-and-after story. This conversation isn’t just about texting and driving. It’s about responsibility, forgiveness, healing, and the question many people struggle with after tragedy: Can you forgive the person who almost took your life? 💡 Episode Highlights 📱 SMS: Short Message Service the everyday texting habit many of us don’t think twice about 🚗 The crash that changed Dave’s life in an instant ⚖️ Understanding the real dangers of distracted driving 🧠 What happens when our phone habits become an addiction 🎖️ How something as simple as a duty belt can help hold life together 🤝 Wrestling with forgiveness after someone nearly takes your life 🗣️ Turning personal trauma into education that can save others 🐱 And yes… how the song “Soft Kitty” can actually play a role in healing ⚖️ Oregon’s Hands-Free Driving Law (ORS 811.507) Oregon law strictly prohibits holding or using a mobile electronic device while driving — even while stopped in traffic or at a red light. Key points of the law: 📵 Holding a phone, texting, browsing, or watching videos while driving is illegal 🎧 Drivers 18+ may only use hands-free accessories (Bluetooth, headset, mounted devices) with voice commands or a single touch/swipe 🚫 Drivers under 18 cannot use phones at all while driving — even hands-free 🚑 Exceptions only apply when contacting emergency services or when safely parked on the roadside Penalties First offense: up to $1,000 fine Second offense: up to $2,500 fine Third offense: may become a criminal misdemeanor with possible jail time 📊 The Reality of Distracted Driving According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA): ⚠️ 3,275 people died in distracted driving crashes in 2023 🚑 324,000+ injuries occurred from distracted driving crashes 📅 On average, 9 people die every single day due to distracted driving 📱 At any given moment, 326,000 drivers are using handheld devices 🚗 Reading a text takes your eyes off the road for about 5 seconds the equivalent of driving a football field blindfolded at highway speed 📉 Texting while driving increases crash risk 23 times 🔍 Takeaway Questions This episode asks some hard but important questions: Is sending a text message worth someone’s life? What responsibility do we carry every time we get behind the wheel? Can you forgive someone whose mistake nearly killed you? How can personal stories help educate others before tragedy strikes? 🔗 Connect with Dave Booth Facebook:https://www.facebook.com/davebooth07 🎧 Listen & Follow Other People’s Shoes 🩵 Instagram 👍 Facebook 🐦 X (Twitter) 📺 YouTube 👟 Website 📣 Leave Us a Review If this episode made you pause… think… or look at your phone a little differently the next time you drive, don’t keep that to yourself. Leave a review and tell us how stepping into Dave’s shoes changed your perspective. 👉 https://www.opspodcast.com/reviews/new/

    43 min
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4.9
out of 5
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About

On my show, I intentionally create space for every voice and every point of view to be heard. Honest, constructive conversations have a way of opening our eyes to stories we might otherwise miss. After all, when you step into Other People’s Shoes, you gain what we’re all searching for… a different perspective on life.

Information

  • Creator
    Neil Matthews
  • Years Active
    2019 - 2026
  • Episodes
    386
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    ℗ & © 2026 Other People's Shoes
  • Show Website
    Other People's Shoes

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