Something about your home not quite right? Hi, I'm Suzanne Hanger and I'm here to help you have a home that feeds your soul. I believe that everyone has a purpose and that if we all lived our purpose, we'd have peace and harmony throughout the World. But in order to fully live that purpose our homes must feed our souls.
I hope you’ll find Soul’s Home® TV helpful in giving you the tools and inspiration you need to have a home that feeds your soul, so you can live your purpose. If this sounds like it’s for you, please subscribe and I’ll look forward to seeing you each Thursday morning. Either way, I wish you well on your journey.
Adult Children Living at Home: A Soulful Guide to Knowing When it’s Time to Let Them Go.
Should you kick your adult children out of your house? The number of adult children who’ve returned home or never left has risen over the last decade, leaving some parents with a dilemma.
If this describes you, how do you make a soulful decision about whether or not to allow your adult children to live with you? The key is to recognize whether or not you’re enabling or empowering your child by allowing them to live with you.
Enabling encourages active addiction, free loading or constant conflict. Enabling won’t help your child become a responsible adult and starves everyone’s souls.
On the other hand, empowerment inspires your child to pursue their soul’s purpose, contribute to the household and live harmoniously, feeding everyone’s souls. Once fully empowered, your adult child will leave on their own when the time is right.
If you’re nervous that will never happen, set a date in your mind that you’d ask your child to start preparing to leave. Make the date far enough away for your child to be able to move out successfully and close enough to give you some comfort.
Eric and I did this but never had to have “the conversation” because the child was long gone by our date. But having the date in our minds made our time with our child much more enjoyable.
If you’re enabling your child, letting them go with love may be what’s most soulful for everyone. But that’s a tough pill to swallow though and not easy to carry out alone. Ask your soul if it’s the most soulful option and for guidance in finding the right people to help.
For help unraveling this, check out the link below to the Soul’s Home® Alignment DIY. Once you do the meditations and exercises, you’ll have a clearer picture of your soul’s calling in relationship to your child.
I hope that you’ll be able to live in harmony and empowerment with everyone in your house.
Next week, we’ll talk about the decision to move to start over. Until next week, I wish you well on your journey.
Is it Time to Move Out of Your Parent’s House? How to Know When You Should Move Out?
Is it time to move out of your parent’s house?
There’s no magic answer to when it’s time to leave your parent’s house. It depends on you, your family and the house. In general, when you feel that you’re being held back or holding others back it’s time to move on.
During the adulting phase, the spiritual purpose of your life is about becoming independent and “finding yourself.” While leaving your parents home can help, it may not be time for you now.
How do you know when it’s time to go? Ask yourself these questions to get clarity:
– Are you your best self at home?
– Do you feel like you can’t be you?
– Do you need to move out to find yourself?
– Are you clear about what you want to do and your parent’s home is providing the support and stability you need as you seek the right opportunity?
– Is there conflict at home that’s better left behind?
– Is staying helping to heal childhood wounds?
– Are you selling yourself short by free loading?
– Are you contributing to the household?
– Are you stuck because you’re afraid to venture out on your own?
– Are you actively preparing to become independent?
– Does your soul call you to stay to help take care of others in the house?
– Are you cleared for take–off?
– Can you support yourself financially?
– Does staying give you breathing room until you have the income and savings to move?
Sit with your answers then ask your soul what it’s calling you to do. If it’s time to go, take a moment to feel gratitude for your parents who’ve allowed you to live there until it was time to go. If it’s not time to go, be clear about why you are staying and how you can use this time to find yourself and prepare for independence.
Next week, we’ll look at this from your parent’s angle. Until next week, I wish you well on your journey.
Should You Buy A House Together Without Being Married? A Guide to A Soulful Approach.
Should you buy a house with a partner you’re not married to?
Buying a house together as a married couple is complicated enough. If you’re not married, there’s even more to iron out. On top of agreeing on the house, location, sharing expenses and merging stuff, an unmarried couple faces more complex property ownership laws, judgments by others on moral and religious grounds and possibly their own commitment issues. These complexities may cloud your soul’s voice causing your ego to decide to buy together when it’s not soulful or NOT buy when it would be soulful.
So, how can you be sure you’re acting soulfully?
– First, check out last week’s episode to see if you have a “soul marriage”. If you don’t, buying together isn’t likely to feed anyone’s soul.
– Second, tune into your own soul’s purpose and spiritual purpose as a couple and agree on what you need most in a house to feed your souls.
– Third, consult a lawyer about how you’ll address the legal gap for unmarried couples taking title to a house together. Married couples may take title so that the other gets the whole house if one of you dies and agreement is necessary to sell. In most states, there isn’t a title for unmarried couples that has both survivorship rights and requires agreement before selling so additional legal documents may be necessary.
– Fourth, whenever you’re in disagreement or are faced with moral or commitment issues, tune into your soul to ask for the spiritual purpose of the trouble. Allow it to either strengthen your resolve to buy together or lead to marriage or simply living together or going your separate ways.
No matter which direction you choose, I hope you’ll be able to have a home and housemates that feed your soul. If you need help on the Journey to Your Soul’s Home®, I’d love to speak with you. Just click Contact Me to schedule a free 30-minute call.
Next time, we’ll ask whether it’s better to buy a house you love or be in a place you love. Until next week, I wish you well on your journey.
Shacking Up: How to Know if Living Together Before Marriage is Soulful
Is shacking up soulful?
While some consider cohabitation before marriage living in sin, it’s important to tune into YOUR soul to know if living together is right for you. First, ask if your souls are already “married”. That may seem like an odd question but my husband and I felt “married” long before our wedding day.
On the other hand, there are legal marriages between people whose souls aren’t married. When your souls are married, the spiritual purpose of living together is to feed each other’s souls so you may more fully live your purpose. Living together, however, is the hardest part of marriage so you may not want to do it without the benefit of legal marriage.
I sometimes joked that if my husband and I didn’t have to live together we’d have the perfect marriage – to which he agrees. That’s because we weren’t always on the same page about money, which way the toilet paper should be hung or the children. It can take years to get in sync.
If you’re thinking of shacking up and have neither a soul marriage nor a legal marriage, then what would be the purpose of living together? Saving money? Sharing household chores? Convenient sex? Avoiding commitment? Chasing after commitment?
Without a “soul marriage”, living together is likely to feed your ego rather than your soul keeping both of you from living your soul’s purpose. I hope that whether you’re legally married or not, you’ll be able to live with people that feed your soul so you can fully live your soul’s purpose.
Next week, we’ll explore the complications of buying a house together without being married. Until next time, I wish you well on your journey.
Should You Move Into Your Spouse’s House When You Get Married?
Should you move into your spouse’s house when you get married?
Now that you’ve found your soul mate, it’s time to find your Soul’s Home®. But can your Soul’s Home® be a house your spouse already owns? That depends.
Presumably, you’re getting married because you feed each other’s souls. Since that’s the case, start with the premise that your relationship is more important than where you live. You could live in the most perfect house but if you’re not in harmony with your spouse, that perfect house will not be your Soul’s Home®. On the other hand, you could live in a terrible house but if you are in harmony with your spouse you will feel like your Soul is Home®.
When you marry, you’re both going from “me” to “we”. Generally, it’s better to approach finding your marital home as a “we” rather than adapting a home that was found as a “me” or worse yet a previous “we.” But sometimes, finances, a unique house or location, children or other life circumstances may make a home that one of you owns your Soul’s Home® too.
There are three steps to hearing whether your souls are calling you to find a new house together or use one of your existing homes:
– First, tune into your soul’s purposes as individuals and as a couple.
– Second, prioritize each of the Soul’s Home® ingredients by what you need most to feed your souls.
– Third, determine if the existing house can meet those priorities for now.
If it can, agree on what changes you’ll make to transform it from a “me” house to your “we” house, how you’ll share expenses, if you’ll both be on the title and when it might be time to consider moving. If an existing house can’t meet your “we” priorities, it’s time to let go and find a new house together. I hope you two soul mates find your Soul’s Home®.
If you need help, I’d love to speak with you. Just click Contact Me to schedule a free 30-minute call. Next week, we’ll talk about moving in together when you’re not married by asking, “Is shacking up soulful?”.
Until next time, I wish you well on your journey.
Is Moving to the “Best” School District Bad for Your Kids? A Guide to Finding a Home in a School District that Will Nourish Everyone’s Souls.
Is moving to the “best” school district bad for your kids?
As parents, part of our soul’s purpose is to empower our children to live their soul’s purpose. And school plays a big part in this. Likely, you’ll consider school safety, test scores, class sizes, teacher attitudes, classroom behavior, extra-curricular activities, college attendance and affordability. While these factors are all important, to make the most soulful choice for your child, the location, community AND home must feed YOUR soul too.
When I do Soul’s Home® Alignment Plans and workshops, parents often express despair over sacrificing feeding their own souls to live in a “better” school district. This can be bad for your kids in a few ways.
– First, the example you provide will impact your child more than their school. It’s easier for your children to grow up living their soul’s purposes, if they see you living yours.
– Second, when your soul isn’t fed, you have less loving energy for your children.
– Third, you risk harming your relationship if you accuse your kids of being ungrateful after ALL you’ve done for them. And when you live in a neighborhood where you don’t feel like you fit in, your kids will likely feel that way too, breeding insecurities.
To avoid these pitfalls, ask your ego to investigate all your options then ask your soul to choose the one that will best feed everyone’s souls. If the school, community, location and house aren’t ALL ideal, ask your soul for the spiritual purpose of the “deficiency”.
For example, if your soul leads you to a better school in the suburbs while you prefer the city, maybe you take regular trips to the city to feed your soul. If your soul calls you to the city and you’re not happy with the school, maybe you’re called to volunteer to make it a better place for everyone’s kids. I hope you’ll be able to find a home in a school district that will nourish everyone’s souls.
If you need help finding your Soul’s Home®, I’d love to speak with you. Just click Contact Me to schedule a free 30-minute call.
Next month, we’ll ask if it’s better to renovate or sell? Until next time, I wish you well on your journey.