The Marriage Fit Podcast Alan Sanders and Susan Delmonico

Hosts Alan and Susan have been gone from the show for a little over a year. They never intended for it to be that long. Today's show helps explain where they have been and what's been happening?

The Low
Today's show starts with the topic of the passing of Susan's father. Ken Ulrich spent the summer of 2021 with them, which was the last time they recorded. It's been a whirlwind of emotions and activities. Susan, as you'll hear, just wasn't able to bring herself to talk about it or record new episodes. However, after completing over 80 miles on the Appalachian Trail and being able to spread some of her parents ashes on the date of her father's birthday, she was ready to get back to recording.

The Highs
After going through the death of Susan's dad and the emotions that went along with it, Alan and Susan recap the relationship with "The Boy." They now can call him their future son-in-law! On top of that, their oldest daughter is also engaged to be married. The whirlwind continues, but on a much more positive note. Christmas is approaching, so Alan and Susan recount their last Christmas and some of the activities they did Christmas Eve.

They wrap up the show recapping their summer nostalgic beach vacation with their girls. The two older brought their significant others, while the youngest brought three friends. Alan and Susan discuss about how nice it is to have true friendships with their adult children. They count their blessings, knowing their kids like to spend time with them. Alan and Susan both admit what a special feeling it is to be able to stay so close with their children even after they are starting their own lives.

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In this episode, hosts Alan and Susan give some advice to our younger selves. The old saying is youth is wasted on the young. By the time you've lived long enough to figure things out, your energy is faded. But, Alan and Susan have learned, you can always make changes in your life, no matter how far along you are. Many times it's fear or worry that prevents us from succeeding or trying new things. Sometimes it's regret or a sense of not measuring up to where you think you should be in life. We seem to be wired for negativity and to harbor emotional baggage. So, looking back at their lives and some of the lessons they've learned, Alan and Susan share their advice to the younger version of themselves.
Where to find us If you enjoy the show, please take a moment to like us on Facebook and follow us on Instagram and Twitter. You can also learn more about us and the show by visiting our website. Finally, take a moment to rate, review and share. Thank you so much for listening. 

In this episode, hosts Alan and Susan wanted to take an introspective look at themselves as they approach the mid-point of the season. Before they get into that, they first take a moment to explain their hit-or-miss absence with the show in the last few weeks. They have really been enjoying time with Susan's dad, but also concerned about getting him on the mend. They know time can rush by, and they want to take advantage of the time they have.
As they move into the topic of the episode, Alan opens with a series of questions for each of them to answer. Both Susan and Alan suggest you invite your significant other to listen and participate. You can literally play along as the two of them go through 10 introspective questions. In the end, Alan and Susan both know there is always more to learn about each other.
As they wind down, Susan reminds the audience that our bodies need to be maintained so they can last as long as possible Much like a car, you can get more years of reliable driving when you take care of it. We only get one life to live, so we need to make the most of every moment.
Where to find us If you enjoy the show, please take a moment to like us on Facebook and follow us on Instagram and Twitter. You can also learn more about us and the show by visiting our website. Finally, take a moment to rate, review and share. Thank you so much for listening. 

In this episode, hosts Alan and Susan discuss making memories, focusing a lot on making those memories with your kids. We were on the road and recording on a cell phone, so the quality of the episode is lower than usualy, but hopefully it will not be a distraction. At the open, Alan and Susan discuss taking a weekend trip and how those jaunts are part of their own memory making. This led to the discussion of Susan's recent birthday dinner with the rest of the family. While enjoying the celebration, discussion arose over beach vacations. The girls remember the summer trips to St. Augustine fondly.
It has been many years since they took a vacation together. Suddenly, with all the good emotions coming from storytelling, the idea came up to try to do return trip to St. Augustine next summer. This discussion leads to some side trails dealing with child-rearing and some challenges their daughters gave them. Also, both Alan and Susan recognize the need for parental boundaries with children. It's great to give them freedom to express themselves, but there needs to be a clear line between parent and child. A parent's job is not to be their child's friend. Rather, once the child reaches adutlhood, that's the appropriate time to soften the parental role in favor for a more friend-like one. By the end, both Alan and Susan recognize we all make mistakes with child rearing. But, the important take-away is to learn from your mistakes and not be afraid to ask for help/advice from professionals if you are overwhelmed.
Where to find us If you enjoy the show, please take a moment to like us on Facebook and follow us on Instagram and Twitter. You can also learn more about us and the show by visiting our website. Finally, take a moment to rate, review and share. Thank you so much for listening. 

In this episode, hosts Alan and Susan refer to this episode as sharing a word about exes and how they can affect the peace and stability of your new marriage. Each of them takes a moment to look back at how life after re-marriage was affected by the presence of their respective exes. Alan reminds the audience about the book, Love Your Children More Than You Hate Your Ex, by previous guest, Dr. Larry Waldman. That title is the best piece of advice for the new marriage. It's a lot harder in practice, but it must be the goal.
Alan spends time recounting the custody fight in court and the unsettling aspects that occured. Susan then opened up and shared about her separation and divorce. Both exes presented significant challenges to them and they had to work through those issues by putting their kids first. Ultimately, through the passage of time, kids grow up and begin to have their own lives. The irony of being custodial parents is even though the kids live with you more, you will not necessarily see them more. As the episode wraps up, Alan and Susan both encourage listeners who might be about to embark on the same journey to have serious discussions about it. The second marriage is bound to have much more baggage than the first. Don't go into it blindly.
Where to find us If you enjoy the show, please take a moment to like us on Facebook and follow us on Instagram and Twitter. You can also learn more about us and the show by visiting our website. Finally, take a moment to rate, review and share. Thank you so much for listening. 

In this episode, hosts Alan and Susan come to terms with the realization that sometimes life gets in the way. Over the past two months, many of their weekly routines have been interrupted. Everyone has a different threshold for feeling overwhelmed. Susan admits her nature requires order around her and when things turn chaotic, it can have an immediate affect on her. Alan admits that while he can roll with changes more easily, it can eventually lead to a point of total overload.
The two decided to have a discussion prior to recording the episode, leading to the idea of having a regularly scheduled meeting time to discuss life. It's important to note having a plan does not mean the plan will always come to fruition. However, it does not mean giving up or ignoring barriers. Making a conscious effort to address the changes and deal with unplanned events will help to lessen their overall impact. Everything that happens in life is a stressor. Some are good, while others bad. Each person has their own threshold before those stressors begin to create fear, anxiety, panic, depression or even anger.
Alan and Susan hope, by talking about these stressors in a calm and constructive way, they can avoid their more deleterious effects down the road. Finally, recognizing that sometimes life gets in the way, they both have pledged to get back to routine workouts and meal planning to help re-center their focus and get back on the path toward making things fit rather than throwing a fit.
If you enjoy the show, please take a moment to like us on Facebook and follow us on Instagram and Twitter. You can also learn more about us and the show by visiting our website. Finally, take a moment to rate, review and share. Thank you so much for listening.