The Scuttlebutt: Understanding Military Culture Veterans Breakfast Club

When one half of a couple joins the military, the other does also, in a sense, by default. There can be a sense of abandonment, as well as a troubling intimation that the military will always come first.
Military spouse Simone Gorrindo joins us to talk about her experience as captured in The Wives: A Memoir. Her book is an intimate and evocative account of the challenges that come with her husband’s deployment.
Initially resistant to the idea of military life, Gorrindo stuck with her boyfriend, Andrew, when he decided to join the Army.
That meant leaving a vibrant life in Manhattan to a rented house near Fort Benning. In time, Andrew left with a special operations unit in Afghanistan.
Gorrindo, who holds a master’s degree in journalism and has a background in editing, felt the constraints of her new role. She found military culture to be one of dependency which, along with the oppressive heat of Georgia, the mundane routine of her days, and the abandonment of her professional life in New York City surrounded her in a curtain of isolation.
Her company consisted primarily of other military wives, each dealing with the challenges of their husbands’ deployments. These women, thrown together by circumstance, navigated a life filled with uncertainty, emotional strain, and the need for resilience.
The uncertainty, anxiety, dependency all recalled Simone’s childhood, one dominated by her mother’s alcoholism. The sense of longing and stability, the desire for connection, pervades her account. Her own background flooded the foreground as she progresses in her pregnancy.
Each deployment felt like a betrayal. The adrenaline and purpose that guided Andrew’s life were absent in hers. As an Army wife, Simone was expected to be compliant and accommodating. The gulf between her and Andrew widened.
Yet, Simone knew her job was to maintain the household and construct a sort of family stability, even as the Army spun plans of its own, of which she was left entirely unaware.
When Andrew returned from a deployment, he had changed. But, she had changed also.
In detailing her story with courageous candor, Simone Gorrindo gives us a opportunity to talk about the dilemmas and difficulties faced by military spouses. It sheds light on the emotional labor, the sense of isolation, and the resilience required to navigate life in the shadow of military deployment.
Through her personal narrative, Gorrindo gives voice to the collective experiences of military wives, arguing for the recognition of their strength and the importance of their own transformations.
We’re grateful to UPMC for Life and Tobacco Free Adagio Health for sponsoring this event!
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VBC Scuttlebutt is a virtual watering hole where camaraderie and connection flow as freely as laughter and shared stories.
Join us to swap stories, good and bad, at home and overseas, old and new. At the VBC, veterans from every era and branch are drawn together by the warm glow of shared purpose.
Here are a few of the things we plan to discuss tonight: medical breakthroughs that came from the military: painkillers, antibiotics, blood-clotting, prosthetics, plasma, not to mention TBI and PTSD.
Combat veterans and fireworks. What do you do  on July 4th?Says one, "It sounded just like the howitzers from Vietnam.”
We remember Nancy Smoyer's beloved brother, 2LT Billy Smoyer, KIA in Vietnam July 28, 1968.
We discuss the variety of head covers in Vietnam: boonie cap, baseball hat?
Norm Phillips from SCORE talks about mentoring Veteran Entrepreneurs and score.org
We follow up with a question posed last week: "were you more or less patriotic after returning from Vietnam?"
We also ask about those who served in Bosnia and/or Kosovo in 1994-1999 and beyond.
These stories aren’t just for veterans; they’re for everyone who wants to understand the lives of those who served. Whether you’re a veteran seeking camaraderie, a civilian wanting to learn, or simply someone who appreciates the value of service, the VBC welcomes you with open arms. Join us online – become part of their mission to honor stories, build bridges, and ensure that every day is Veterans Day.
We’re grateful to UPMC for Life and Tobacco Free Adagio Health for sponsoring this event!
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Jack McLean joins us again to talk about his new book, Found: A Veteran Story which tells how he healed from Vietnam.
Last year, Jack recounted the history behind his best-selling memoir of 2009, Loon: A Marine Story. Jack served in Vietnam in 1967-68 tour with Charlie Company of the 1st Battalion, 4th Marine Regiment, 3rd Marine Division. He survived a lot of combat, including a harrowing three-day fight at LZ Loon near the Laotian border in I Corps.
Jack’s homecoming was both unique and typical of the Vietnam generation of veterans. On the one hand, he went straight to Harvard University, the first Vietnam veteran to attend.
On the other hand, he found it difficult to connect with fellow veterans or with anyone who was interested in his service. In 1968, he walked into a VFW hall and received only the chilliest of cold shoulders from the older veterans there. “Nobody offered me a beer,” he writes. “Nobody invited me to join the card game. Nobody waved me over to the pool table. Nobody welcomed me home.”
Coupled with survivor guilt and un-processed trauma of combat, such neglect and isolation only fed his sense that something was wrong.
Jack found healing as he tracks down fellow Marines and the Gold Star family members who never made it home.
We’re grateful to UPMC for Life and Tobacco Free Adagio Health for sponsoring this event!
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Brian Ahearn is the son of a Vietnam Marine veteran and author of a memoir, His Story, My Story, Our Story, a heartrending tale that illuminates the stark realities of war, from the battlegrounds of Vietnam to the emotional frontlines at home.
Following a Marine veteran, the narrative intricately unravels his grapple with PTSD and the profound ripple effect it has on his family, particularly his son. Crafted from the personal wartime accounts of Brian Ahearn Sr. and juxtaposed with his son’s, Brian Ahearn Jr., candid reflections on growing up under the shadow of trauma, this story bridges two generations marked by war’s enduring scars.
The dual lens through which His Story, My Story, Our Story is told provides a first-hand account of war and its aftershock within a family setting. Through raw storytelling, it seeks to guide Marines in evading service-related pitfalls, fortify understanding between Marine families, and mend the delicate fabric of father-son relationships.
Addressing the often unspoken emotional challenges faced by military families, this profound and insightful work serves as a healing blueprint for those navigating the intricate dance of love, duty, trauma and legacy, standing as a beacon of hope and resilience.
We’re grateful to UPMC for Life and Tobacco Free Adagio Health for sponsoring this event!
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We welcome husband and wife duo, Randy and Jackie Kluj, who share their extraordinary journeys from Army helicopter cockpits to their work with  Creek and Timber Legacy nonprofit. The Klujs bring a unique perspective on service, resilience, and the healing power of nature.
Randy Kluj, a native of northern Maine, grew up with a profound love for the outdoors, spending his childhood hunting, fishing, and exploring the wilderness. His passion for aviation led him to Norwich University, and upon graduation, he joined the U.S. Army to pursue flight school. Randy’s military career saw him piloting the AH-64D Apache Longbow. Over a decade of service, Randy distinguished himself as an instructor pilot and completed multiple deployments in support of Operation Iraqi Freedom and Operation Enduring Freedom. Today, Randy continues to fly as a civilian medevac pilot in Western Pennsylvania, where he lives with Jackie.
Jackie Bechdel Kluj’s roots are firmly planted in western Pennsylvania. She enlisted in the Army Reserves through ROTC in 2001. By 2003, she had earned her commission as a 2LT and was on her way to flight school at Fort Rucker, Alabama. Graduating with honors in 2005, Jackie specialized in flying the UH-60 Black Hawk. Her career highlights include serving as a platoon leader and battle captain during her deployment in support of Operation Enduring Freedom, KFOR8 in Kosovo. Jackie’s leadership and innovative training exercises were recognized in the Army Times, showcasing her dedication and skill. She was honorably discharged in 2011, but her commitment to service never wavered.
In 2019, Randy and Jackie channeled their shared love for the outdoors and their dedication to helping others into founding Creek and Timber Legacy. This nonprofit organization aims to enrich the lives of veterans, first responders, and children with serious illnesses through immersive outdoor experiences. By partnering with various organizations and individuals, Creek and Timber Legacy provides hunting, firearm therapy, and outdoor learning opportunities, promoting emotional well-being and a renewed sense of energy.
We’re grateful to UPMC for Life and Tobacco Free Adagio Health for sponsoring this event!
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VBC Scuttlebutt is a virtual watering hole where camaraderie and connection flow as freely as laughter and shared stories.
Join us to swap stories, good and bad, at home and overseas, old and new. At the VBC, veterans from every era and branch are drawn together by the warm glow of shared purpose.
The stories bridge the gap and the years with veterans from World War II, Korea, Vietnam, the Gulf War, late Cold War, Iraq and Afghanistan, and other eras and deployments. Non-veterans also join the circle, eager to understand, to listen, to learn.
They ask questions with genuine respect and a desire to honor the sacrifices made. This intergenerational dialogue, forged in the crucible of shared experience, builds bridges of empathy and understanding.
These stories aren’t just for veterans; they’re for everyone who wants to understand the lives of those who served. Whether you’re a veteran seeking camaraderie, a civilian wanting to learn, or simply someone who appreciates the value of service, the VBC welcomes you with open arms. Join us online – become part of their mission to honor stories, build bridges, and ensure that every day is Veterans Day.
Special Guests: Jon Molik from the Headlines and History Podcast and Clint Jordan from Mil-Estate Planning.
We’re grateful to UPMC for Life and Tobacco Free Adagio Health for sponsoring this event!
#militaryhistory #veteran #interview #veterans #vet #veteransbreakfastclub #vbc #virtualevents #virtual #zoom #zoomevents #liveevent #webinar #military #army #usarmy #navy #usnavy #marinecorps #marines #airforce #pilot #aviators #coastguard #nonprofit #501c3 #history  #militaryveterans #veteransstories #veteranshistory #veteraninterview #veteranshistoryproject #veteransoralhistory #veteranowned #militaryretirees #armyretirees #navyretirees #warstories #vietnam #vietnamwar #vietnamveterans #koreanwar #coldwar #greatestgeneration #wwii #ww2 #worldwarii #worldwar2 #war #americanhistory #oralhistory #podcast  #scuttlebutt #thescuttlebutt #humor #storytelling #headlines #news #roundtable #breakfast #generation911 #happyhour