Hog Planet Hog Planet

Dan and Sam talk about the grim Bored Ape concerts, January 6th hearings and Mike Pence's brush with the hog mob, the ongoing GOP freakout over their children refusing to become homophobic and transphobic bigots, Hollywood's useless pledge to reexamine firearms use in the wake of Uvalde, and the hogs who can’t afford all the junk food they want to eat because of Joe Biden and his inflation. As usual, we ramble, it gets dark at times, and we have almost no idea of what we are talking about, but it’s your boys. Check it out.

It's a hog planet so please consider donating to:

Help Secure Housing for an Immigrant Roma Family:

https://www.gofundme.com/f/secure-housing-for-a-immigrant-roma-family?utm_campaign

Ward 2 Mutual Aid:

https://opencollective.com/ward-2-mutual-aid

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https://www.currentaffairs.org/2022/06/what-is-a-woman-is-a-feature-length-exploration-of-conservative-ignorance-and-prejudice/




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To make up for yet another extended hiatus, Dan and Sam slapped together a real barnbuster of an episode for the hogs. Return guest Barto (@ElBartoArmy) joined us for a wide-ranging discussion of ongoing hog happenings. We began on a more somber note, with a brief tribute to the king Gilbert Gottfried and desperate musings about our diseased, violent society in the wake of the unthinkable shooting in Uvalde, Texas. Luckily, we were able to lighten it up with Dan’s unwittingly encountering a GOP Congressman's interminable speech, Seth Green’s stolen Bored Ape NFT, and the chaotic Havana Syndrome episode of Law & Order. Be sure to stick around to the end for Jack, our Resident Soulsborne expert, who joined us to help Sam rip apart tech dingus Elon Musk’s atrocious Elden Ring build.

How to support the boys

Ward 2 Mutual Aid: https://opencollective.com/ward-2-mutual-aid

Barto's music: https://armed-jouissance.bandcamp.com/album/-

Jack's music: https://johndonne.bandcamp.com/


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On this one the hogs caught up with recent Epstein-adjacent developments, the Queen’s rather nasty bout of COVID, and Trump’s new TRUTH social media platform featuring Kodak Black. We spent the rest of the episode watching the clips, including the Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power, a literal waste of a billion dollars spent on dated video game cut-scene level CGI and characters absolutely nobody cares about. We also bore witness to the advent of the upcoming planned communities for Disney adults in the Coachella Valley, the dreadfully awkward consent manufacturing on the Washington Post’s TikTok account, and the endless weed farms of the metaverse. To close out, we checked in on the musical world of the Canadian trucker convoy, including the vocal stylings of Jordan B. Peterson, just in time before our very own homegrown American chuds bring the party to Washington, DC.



It’s a Hog Planet. Please contribute to Ward 2 Mutual Aid:

https://opencollective.com/ward-2-mutual-aid


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Like the bat signal on the blackened skies of Gotham, feral hogs have descended upon the San Francisco Bay Area to herald the return of Hog Planet. On our triumphant return, we poured one out for the fallen hog lawyer Michael Avenatti, whose string of heinous crimes, including extorting Stormy Daniels and the Nike Corporation, among others, could land him in jail for decades. Next, Dan and Sam rampaged through the discursive streets of the Joe Rogan vaccine and n-word controversies. Our hosts’ credibility may never recover. Lastly, we handed the mic over to 4 AM fruit stand enjoyer and New York Mayor Eric Adams, who called us a certain wafery slur in return. There you have it, folks, this episode is a bona fide feral swine bomb. Stick around for an eyewitness Mayor Pete report before the hog credits roll.



It’s a Hog Planet. Please contribute to Ward 2 Mutual Aid:

https://opencollective.com/ward-2-mutual-aid


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Your beloved hogs return to cover a story that seems like we made it up: Alec Baldwin’s tragic misfire on the set of Rust, the senseless death of rising talent Halyna Hutchins, and the toxic work environment that let it happen. Who is to blame? Baldwin? Assistant Director Dave Halls? Or 24-year-old set armorer Hannah Gutierrez-Reed? We turn to the least reliable sources to see what they think, like costume-designer-turned-scab-apologist Terese Magpale Davis, Gutierrez-Reed’s deeply soulless defense attorneys, and, of course, Baldwin himself. 

To lighten things up, we treat the fans to a tight 4 from a rising star in the vaguely anti-vax comedy world: Jim Breuer, age 54. In an attempt to plug his own podcast and upcoming comedy special, he recently took to Twitter to post 4 minutes of, er, jokes, which mainly consisted of anti-vax bird squawks, piss, shit, fart, and puke sounds, and other weird, bad, and loud noises. Underneath it all, there were apparently some contrarian Gen-Xer points made. Listen kid, the podcasting game ain’t for everyone.

Blessedly we only have one political hog to inflict on you this time around: Republican Delegate-elect Tim Anderson. But he might be too hot to handle! (crowd groans)

It’s a Hog Planet. Please contribute to Ward 2 Mutual Aid:

https://opencollective.com/ward-2-mutual-aid

See Dan's paintings on instagram @ dspaventa

For full video of this and all recent Hog Planet episodes go to Hog Planet on YouTube. Music by Bags (http://soundcloud.com/josephsbags). Subscribe to hogplanet.substack.com.


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And now, we deliver unto you a long overdue look into the infamous January 6 riot at the Capitol, a watershed moment for hog culture. We reflected on that day when the Trump chuds were so sure that the Democrats were seizing control of the US government that they decided to just go ahead and try to do it themselves. We also checked up on some of the people who have been arrested and even sentenced for their roles in this exceedingly dumb release of misplaced aggression. We wrapped it up with Sam’s eyewitness accounts of the Justice for January 6 protest on September 18, where maybe 300 people showed up to wave their flags, bicker with counter protesters, and get all weepy about how the criminal justice system is treating their comrades. Yeah, that’s right, I went through that so that you don’t have to. Just another day at the office for us at Hog Planet.


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