B is for Being

Benjamin Hammersley
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  • SELF-IMPROVEMENT
B is for Being Podcast

Benjamin is on a quest to uncover his authenticity after spending most of his life blocked by crippling self-doubt and anxiety. He talks with friends, psychologists, and thought leaders about the most effective tools for uncovering authentic expression.

  1. 14/06/2020

    056: Jeremy Albertsen - Navigating the Obstacles to Oneness

    Today I'm speaking with my friend, Jeremy Albertsen. Jeremy is the author of The Pursuit of Clarity - a book which documents his journey through different levels of awareness as he gave up the distractions and numbing habits of the Western World, and entered deep states of meditation. Jeremy is also a gardener, musician, poet, and artist. I first met Jeremy in 2018 while attending the New Warrior Training Adventure run by the ManKind Project in Western Australia. Jeremy was a facilitator and guided me through a particularly challenging experience at the workshop. I was intrigued by Jeremy's compassionate and grounded nature as he interacted with me and others even in demanding situations. In this episode, Jeremy and I talk about the practicalities and obstacles to experiencing states of oneness, how to tune into different frequencies of consciousness, the process of letting go of an undesired habit, and much more. Please enjoy this insightful and heartfelt talk with Jeremy Albertsen. Also discussed in this episode: * Jeremy's approach to spirituality through direct experience. * Ben shares his history with people-pleasing behaviour and losing connection with his authentic self. * Being our genuine selves – It's OK to disappoint others. * The obstacles to oneness and the tools for moving closer to this state. * Ben shares his thoughts on taking action from the soul. * The challenges of applying oneness to everyday life. * Allowing 'bad' habits to let go of us. * Jeremy speaks about standing in our personal truth may mean disappointing the people around us. * Jeremy shares the difference between surrender and passivity. * Everyday opportunities for practicing selflessness. * Jeremy talks about changing our relationship to anger. "It's better to be angry in a way that's safe than to bottle it up." * Emotional entrainment – people tune into the strongest vibration we're holding. * Coming back to everyday life after experiencing states of oneness. * Practicing grace in everyday life. * Compassion as a driving force in the universe. Connect with Jeremy Albertsen * Instagram * Facebook The Pursuit of Clarity Find it on Amazon | Book Depository | Dymocks Select Artwork from Jeremy Contacting the Ancestors by Jeremy Albertsen Support for B is for Being If you've found this episode helpful,

    2h 2m

  2. 10/01/2020

    055: Kemane Bâ – On Slow Growth, Self-Honesty, and Practices for Restoring Inner Harmony

    "I believe slow growth is the only actual growth. When something grows super fast, I think, 'Did it actually grow? Or did it explode?'" – Kemane Bâ Kemane Bâ (@kemaneba) is an artist, musician, and multi-talented being who is deep on the journey of self-discovery. Kemane has a passion for teaching art and removing the internal obstacles to allow creativity to flow. He lives off-grid in his self-built garden hut in Frankfurt, Germany and is the founder of the Konduktum – an online learning 'playground' for artists to learn and share from each other's artistic experiences while developing their technical skills. I first learned about Kemane through the marvellous Simon Höfer while I was living in Berlin. Simon told me of Kemane's various explorations into consciousness during dreams states and meditation, and also introduced me to his creative work. In each animation, painting, and song, I sensed Kemane's deep appreciation and curiosity for life. Kemane's art has frequently brought me to states of wondrous calm and has been a reminder for me to walk gently on my journey. It's now been four years that I've followed Kemane's work online and I've finally invited him to the podcast - and I'm very glad I did! In this long-form discussion, we dive deep into the origins of Kemane's journey, different approaches to self-growth, daytime lucidity, social media fasting, and much more. Please enjoy this nutritious discussion with the delightful Kemane Bâ. Show Notes Click a timecode to listen (audio only) * Introduction to Kemane [00:10] * Kemane's journey of self-discovery [10:56] * Unpleasant experiences for personal growth [31:36] * The organic unfolding of self - slow growth [39:29] * Using the dream realm as a tool for self-discovery - practicing daytime lucidity [48:07] * Kemane speaks about the influence of his mother and father [54:13] * Tiny tour of Kemane's off-grid hut [57:42] * The power of belief systems [59:46] * Helpful environments and experiences for returning to our inner-harmony [01:03:51] * The process of healing mental and emotional trauma [01:20:25] * Social media fasting, and the pitfalls of cutting things out of our lives [01:31:14] * The process of identifying limiting beliefs [01:45:49] * Kemane speaks about Gemüse Helden (Vegetable Heroes) and the permaculture garden where he lives [01:50:44] * The nature of self can feel lonely at times [01:52:58] * "Take it slow." Kemane shares advice for starting the journey of self-discovery [01:55:38] * Creating resonance for slowing down - Slow Videos [02:08:12] * Mental stamina - an occupied mind can be a happy mind [02:12:14] * Becoming aware of the cycle we are in - a cycle of external-service or a cycle of internal-service [02:23:17] * Kemane shares the advice he would give to a younger version of himself [a hre...

    2h 50m

  3. 22/04/2019

    054: Welcome to B is for Being Version 2

    Take a tour of the new home of B is for Being. We start this episode with a realisation which has brought more compassion to my creative process and removed the pressure from me to produce content on a hard deadline. Then, we take a tour of the new site of B is for Being. I guide you through each section of the site, including a brand new section dedicated to rest and reflection. If this is your first time on the site, this episode will provide a good overview of B is for Being. Hit play and let's dive in! The Realisation Which Brought Compassion to My Creative Process * How I burned myself out and caused myself creative trauma. [01:22] * The realisation which changed the way I look at creating. [02:53] * Doubts! Others will lose interest if I don't release content on a regular schedule! [05:20] * Trusting the people who are interested in what I'm saying, creating, making, will make the time to watch or listen. [06:20] Tour of B is for Being Version 2 * Introduction to the new site. [07:30] * Podcast - Conversations with friends, psychologists, and thought leaders on authentic expression and self-discovery. [08:07] * Slow Video - Gentle videos for rest and reflection. (An essential part of my self-discovery process.) [08:50] * Blog - An open journal of thoughts and observations as I uncover my authenticity. Including how I'm navigating the obstacles which come up along the way. [12:11] Selected Links from this Episode * Slow Videos on B is for Being * Slow Videos on YouTube

    17 min

  4. 22/08/2017

    053: Pausing the Podcast + The Courage to Create (new video series)

    Sorry for keeping you hanging. I've been on an extended break from the podcast after burning myself out. I realised I was forcing myself to produce episode after episode from a place of fear instead of a genuine desire to create. I forced myself to keep producing episodes because I thought if I stopped, you might lose interest in what I’m doing and never come back. Sounds familiar, right? So in this episode, I explain what kept me in this fear as well as the new agreement I've made with myself to stop creating if I’m not having fun or being kind to myself. Also, did somebody say ‘new video series?’ Yes, yes they did! Tune-in to learn about the new series where I will be exploring the courage to express my creativity openly. (Note: Apologies for the clicking sound in this episode. I recorded this with my earbuds and the microphone was tapping against the zip of my jacket every time I moved :/) Show Highlights Click on a time marker to hear the full podcast * Why you haven’t heard from me in a while 00:52 * I’m not creating anything unless it feels fun 04:28 * I’m starting a new video series 06:49 * Why would I not create the very thing I want to create? 10:29 * There was a lot of shame thrown around in my family environment so it takes courage to stepout and express myself creatively. 15:40 * The Courage to Create 18:03 Mentioned in This Episode * Free Flow Fridays Series * B is for Being on YouTube (watch this space for the new video series!)

    24 min

  5. 17/06/2017

    052: The Most Effective Technique for Relieving Anxiety

    Anxiety, meet the present moment. I've struggled with anxiety for the greater part of my life. It wasn't until I went through a particularly anxious period that I went on a search to find an 'off' button for my incessant anxious thinking. I discovered that by bringing my attention to the present moment the intensity of my anxiety began to lessen. Over time, by continuing to practice present moment awareness, I’ve experienced such a significant reduction in my anxious thinking that I often forget how much I was suffering previously. In this episode, I share how we can use the present moment to diminish the power of our anxiety and begin experiencing effective relief from our worrisome thoughts. Disclaimer: The technique outlined in this episode assumes that a low, to moderate level of anxiety is present. Practicing this technique may become difficult when experiencing high levels of anxiety. Show Notes Click on a time marker to hear the full podcast What is Anxiety? 05:04 Anxiety is the experience which is caused by imagining the possibility of something unpleasant happening at a future point in time. How the experience of anxiety begins and becomes stronger: * We have a thought about something unpleasant happening (this thought can be conscious or sub-conscious). * Our body has a physiological reaction to the thought (a sensation in the body). * We react to the unpleasant sensation in the body with anxious thoughts on what the sensation could mean. * Our body has an even stronger physiological reaction to the increased anxiety of our thoughts. * We react with even more anxious thinking about what these increased sensations could mean. * The cycle continues… Anxiety Appears to Be a True Representation of Reality 11:34 * Anxiety is our own synthesised layer of reality which we unconsciously super-impose onto reality itself. * Imagine a tree, just existing in nature. If we imagine that tree is a happy tree, we will begin to notice all of the happy attributes of the tree. On the other hand, if we imagine the tree is a sad tree, we will begin to notice all of the tree’s sad attributes. * We create a layer of reality which influences how we perceive objects that exist in objective reality. * When I realised my anxiety was a layer I was overlaying onto objective events, I realised that my anxious experience was only determined by the layer I had created and was not determined by actuality itself. The Most Effective Technique for Relieving Anxiety 16:42 * The present moment is the most effective technique for relieving anxiety. Anxiety depends on the future projection of something bad happening. If we take away the future point in time, we remove energy from our anxiety and begin to feel some relief. * By observing the present moment, we can begin to experience the separation between our anxiety and what is actually occurring around us. What is The Present Moment? 18:44 * The present moment is not a thing. It can’t be had, gotten or discovered. The present moment is an experience to be experienced. * The present moment is occurring all the time wherever we go. It’s a tool which follows us wherever we go. * We perceive the present moment with our senses. How to Practice Using The Present Moment to Relieve Anxiety 20:42 * An important note: We are not trying to bypass our anxiety with the present moment.

    38 min

  6. 03/06/2017

    051: Why I Started Keeping a Compliments Journal

    A short episode outlining the benefits of recording the compliments we receive. After realising how much negative self-talk I was doing, I went searching for some ways to bring more positivity back into the picture. I didn’t expect that writing down the compliments I received would have such a great effect on my self-worth and provide me with a source of support during times of intense self-doubt. In this episode, I let you know why I started keeping a compliments journal and how it’s allowed me to receive the nice things people say about me, while simultaneously reducing my bias towards self-negativity. Show Notes Click on a time marker to hear the full podcast I Have a Hard Time Receiving Compliments 01:15 * After I had started keeping a compliments journal, I found it became easier to accept the compliments given to me. * I would diminish the value of compliments I received by saying, “Other people can do the same thing. I'm not that special.” * By doing that, I’m telling the other person that I am not receiving their compliment. I do this because I don’t feel worthy of receiving such high praise. Challenging My Level of Self-Worth 02:31 * I carry a lot of self-worth in certain areas of my life, but in others, my level of self-worth feels very low. * In areas of low self-worth, it’s very difficult for me to accept compliments from others. * I confront my current level of self-worth every time I write down a compliment. * It felt awkward when I first started writing compliments down. However, the act of writing down a compliment began to familiarise me to receive them. How to Keep a Compliments Journal 04:23 * I recommend writing down the compliments in a small notebook. * Write down every compliment you receive. * When you receive a compliment, write down: * The compliment * Who gave it to you * The context in which you received the compliment * The date Why I Started Keeping a Compliments Journal 06:00 * When the level of my negative self-talk became too much for me, I decided something needed to change. * I realised I wouldn’t tolerate someone else talking so negatively to me, so why do I talk that way to myself? * At that point, keeping a compliments journal seemed like a good choice to address my self-negativity. The Benefits 07:22 * There are multiple benefits which begin to occur as a result of keeping a compliments journal. * Your current level of self-worth will be challenged and expanded. * When you’re going through self-doubt, it serves as a potent reminder of the value you already have inside you. * It balances out a bias towards self-negativity by also reminding you of the positive things people are saying about you. Mentioned in This Episode * The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron

    12 min

  7. 27/05/2017

    050: Why Do I Feel Worthless When I’m Told I Need to Improve?

    A performance review that didn't go as expected. I had my first performance review at work this week. After receiving feedback that I needed to improve in certain areas, I felt my self-worth drop. However, my supervisors weren't unhappy with me nor had they delivered an ultimatum that I either improve or lose my job. I left work with a big question: Why does our competency in certain areas of life dictate our level of self-worth? In this episode, I take a walk through the city and break down what was behind my feelings of worthlessness. I also share my thoughts on how particular parenting styles serve to connect a child's actions with their sense of worth, and how this connection can be broken by practicing self-acceptance. Show Notes Click on a time marker to hear the full podcast The Performance Review 01:32 * The performance review required my supervisors and myself to fill out the same form. If a certain area of feedback didn’t match on the two forms then we would discuss that area of the job. * I felt good about the work I’d done over the previous two months and was feeling positive about the review. * There were four ratings for each area of the job * Requires improvement * Satisfactory * Good * Outstanding * About 10 minutes into the performance review, I realised there were quite a few areas of feedback which differed. “These Areas Need Improvement” 03:46 * My supervisors had rated me as ‘requires improvement’ in quite a few areas. * I knew I wouldn’t receive positive feedback in every area but I didn’t expect to rate in the ‘requires improvement’ section as I have been putting in a lot of effort at work. * They weren’t unhappy with me, they were simply stating these areas of your job require improvement. The Reaction 05:18 * I went into shutdown mode. * They were talking to me but I wasn’t able to process the feedback they were giving me. * I was familiar with this shutdown feeling as it happened a lot to me as a kid. * While doing maths homework as a kid, I remember desperately wanting to understand how to work out the maths problem to ease the tension of the parent who was trying to help me, and who had become frustrated that I wasn’t understanding how to work it out. They Weren’t Angry 06:51 * The feeling I had during the performance review was very similar, the only difference was my supervisors weren’t becoming stressed or freaking out. * They continued to give me feedback but I realised I still wasn’t able to process what they were saying. * I had to ask them to repeat what they’d said as I was still processing the initial feedback they’d given me. I Became Proactive in Receiving Their Feedback 08:51 * It felt good to let them know what was going on for me. They had no problem repeating their feedback and I realised they still weren’t freaking out or getting mad. * I began actively taking notes on the feedback they were giving me and ensured I’d recorded all of it. Actively taking in their feedback on the areas my areas of improvement took me out of feeling like I was just little kid who was always making mistakes and needed to try harder. Why Is Our Self-Worth Attached to Our Ability to Do Things? 09:53 * Why does my level of self-worth drop when I’m told I need to improve something I’m doing. * I’m reading a href="https://www.

    25 min

  8. 20/05/2017

    049: Why Do I Stop Sharing Myself Authentically with You?

    I know I do it, but why? You might have realised by now, expressing myself authentically is pretty important. I’ve written about it many times on the site, yet I find myself drifting back into not speaking and writing from my current level of knowledge and understanding. I change how I write and speak to sound like I know more than you about the topics I share. In this episode, I explore the reasons why I stop sharing myself authentically with you, and how my inauthenticity always guides me back to being myself. Show Notes Background to This Episode 01:24 * The way I’ve been talking in the last few episodes wasn’t authentic to me. You probably wouldn’t have noticed it but it’s really important for me because It hasn’t felt like I have been sharing myself in a way that’s true to my current level of knowledge. I Feel I’ve Been Telling You What to Do 03:57 * In the last few episodes, I’ve directed instructions at you. * Listening back to those episodes, I didn’t feel they were a true representation of me at that point in time. * I was talking as a teacher, with a tone of authority as if I knew everything about the subject. * I do know helpful techniques for stepping out of fear, anxiety and doubt, but I don’t know everything about these subjects. I Shouldn’t Be Surprised That I’m Still Struggling With Authenticity 05:28 * There is no 100% authentic stage for anyone in life. * I want to be real when I speak; true to my current level of knowledge and represent that on the outside. * It’s ironic that in the previous episode, I spoke about being critical of another person for not being true to their current level of knowledge. Why Do I Keep Slipping Back Into Not Being Myself? 07:57 * I’ve written about not being true to myself and spoken about it before but over time, I keep slipping back into it. * It starts when I begin doubting the quality of my content is good enough for people. As a result, I begin to overproduce the content. Authentic Self-Expression Is an Important Theme in My Life 08:59 * It's important for me to express what’s inside me truthfully on the outside. I’m not talking about sharing every detail of my life. It’s about me representing what’s true for me in this moment. * It feels like I’m lying to people when I present myself in another way to how I’m feeling in this moment. If I present myself as feeling confident and in control when I don't feel that way, that would feel like I’m lying with my words and actions. * When I don’t present myself truthfully, it feels bad to me. So it’s become important for me to work out how to present myself truthfully. How Does it Feel When You’re Being Authentic? 12:01 * There’s a sense of ease. There’s a sense of connection with myself as well as the person I’m talking with. * There’s a flow to my words and I won't be stopping and starting as much. I’ll also be listening to the next thing I’m going to say. * I feel present with what’s happening in that moment; I’m aware of where I am and what’s going on around me. * It’s difficult for someone to know what’s authentic and what isn’t for another person. You don’t know if what I’m saying is true to how I feel inside. The Ways in Which I’m Inauthentic 14:00 * When I write in a way which implies I know everything about a subject, or I talk in a way which implies I always use the techniques I s...

    30 min
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About

Benjamin is on a quest to uncover his authenticity after spending most of his life blocked by crippling self-doubt and anxiety. He talks with friends, psychologists, and thought leaders about the most effective tools for uncovering authentic expression.

Information

  • Creator
    Benjamin Hammersley
  • Years Active
    2015 - 2020
  • Episodes
    56
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Benjamin Hammersley
  • Show Website
    B is for Being

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