Holy Ghosting Lindsay, Meg & Sarai

Meg opens up about her experiences in YWAM. You don't want to miss this episode in our Youth With A Mission series.


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In this episode, we dive into the not-so-wonderful world of Youth With a Mission, aka YWAM. We chat with our pal (and Lindsay’s sister), D.L. Mayfield about the history and horrors of the cult-like organization that began with one white guy's vision of young people sweeping the globe for Jesus. (Totally not creepy, right?)

Fast forward a few decades and YWAM is one of the largest missions organizations on the planet, with 1100 locations in 180+ countries and over 18,000 (unpaid!) staff.

It should come as no surprise to our listeners that YWAM is super problematic.. We get into all the cultiest aspects of this organization - from their Discipleship Training School to the forced trauma bonding that they call “Plumbline”. YWAM’s entire model is recruiting young people - before their prefrontal cortexes are fully formed - and they make it VERY hard to leave. If you do manage to escape the cult of YWAM, chances are you’ll be left with zero real-life skills with a side of religious trauma.



We’ll be back in a few weeks with a part 2 where we hear from friends and listeners about their about their firsthand encounters with YWAM. (Spoiler alert: the reviews aren't exactly glowing.)



Links

-Check out DL and Krispin Mayfield’s brand new project, Strong Willed (all about recovering from religious authoritarian parenting) - https://strongwilled.substack.com/

-DL Mayfield on Instagram - @d_l_mayfield

-Tiktok - @dlmayfield

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In our latest episode we jump into the turbulent waters of gendered messages and purity culture with a critical eye on the Christian advice book, 'For Young Women Only'—or as we like to call it, “How to NOT Cause a Guy to Stumble.” Published in the early 2000s, this book perpetuates harmful beliefs about gender, sexuality, and the role of women in the church, echoing through youth groups and beyond.
We dissect the enforced performance of masculinity, the unjust objectification of women's bodies, and the dangerous overlap of rape and purity cultures that unjustly places blame on women. Our discussion goes deeper, challenging the control exerted over thoughts and visuals, the male gaze, and the relentless standards set by modesty teachings and visual temptations, all underscored by eyebrow-raising survey results from teenage boys.
This episode is an unflinching conversation about the impacts of sexual assault and harassment, underscoring the urgent need for autonomy, consent education, and a seismic shift in attitudes toward women's bodies and choices.
Get ready, Ghosties, to break free from the shackles of high-control religion. It's time to unravel the mess, advocate for bodily autonomy, and maybe, just maybe, start healing.



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What happens when a homeschooled horse girl feels “god put Africa on her heart?” Well. It could be a lot of things. In fact, your own fave Ghostie Hostie, Lindsay, was exactly this kind of girlie. And yet! Just as two paths diverge in a yellow wood, so do our choices take us to different places. Lindsay, for one, went on a medical mission to Uganda, wore scrubs, and - shockingly - didn’t perform a single medical intervention that would require training, certification, or licensure.

For Renee Bach, the white missionary who is the subject of Savior Complex an HBO Original Documentary Series, she chose a path (hopefully) less taken and went full speed ahead providing services that were way beyond her training and competency - with dire results.

Join your thrilling throuple, Lindsay, Meg, and Sarai, as they discuss the second half of the Max docuseries, Savior Complex.

Listen to Part One of our Recap Here https://open.spotify.com/episode/70ycXZYsU72AtCR4Lv6q8t?si=3724aa0d27c542f6

They get down and dirty into the accusations surrounding Renee as No White Saviors picks up momentum online, talk a whole load of shit about Renee’s doting mother, Laurie Bach, and wrestle with the centering of white voices and behaviors that are rife within this story (including ours!)

While it’s useful, at times, to wrap our minds around something by defaulting to narratives with good guys and bad guys (or…good homeschool horse girls vs bad ones?), real life is much more complicated than all that. What we end up with is a very gray story with a lot of problematic white women centering themselves in it. Which you can hear more of while your ghostie hosts do a little of that too, hopefully in a helpful way.

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Just when you think you’ve had your fill of problematic white women, Renee Bach comes along. Look, your Murder of MILFs (hey! It stands for “Mom I’d Like to Friend,” get your head out of the gutter!) watched “Savior Complex,” a documentary detailing the ascent of a young missionary, Renee Bach and Serving His Children, the organization she founded and operated in Uganda. At the wise and totally reasonable age of 19, she discovered she had “a heart for Africa” and was called by God. 

What started out as a feeding program rapidly mushroomed into an unlicensed medical clinic. Renee herself, homeschooled horse girl with no medical training or credentials took it upon herself to conduct medical procedures on malnourished children with disastrous results. 

We watched this horror so you don’t have to! The docu-series is on HBO Max and is 3 episodes in total - in this episode, we tackle the first episode and part of the second. (Part 2 will be out soon!)

Know this: you’re going to need to gird your loins (or ears), because the conversation includes extremely ill and malnourished children, infant and child death, white supremacy, and Renée’s mom, Laurie Bach, who might be the biggest trigger of all…


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Women’s Love Language is Acts of Service and Men’s Love Language is Physical Touch: on the Problematic (and Gendered) Love Languages with Crystal Britt

In this episode, Meg and Lindsay chat with Crystal Britt, a licensed clinical social worker and actual therapist about the famed book, ‘The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts’ by pastor (NOT therapist) Gary Chapman. We talk about how the Five Love Languages are reductive, gendered, and heteronormative and how there are many better resources for communication in relationships.



Christians especially love this read and recommend the Five Love Languages as if the Lord himself wrote this book. Why is that? Welp, we get into it with the lovely Crystal Britt throughout this episode. (Spoiler alert: it’s the misogyny.)


Follow Crystal Everywhere@itscrystalbritt

Podcast: Time To Lean
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/time-to-lean/id1620236607


Recommended:

Bell Hooks: All About Love

The Gottman's: 7 Principles for Making a Marriage Work

Dr. Rachel Vanderbuilt on TikTok - Queer Focus

Dr. Stan Tatkin: Wired For Love

Emily Nagoski, Ph.D.: Come As You Are & Come Together

Jessica Fern: Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy

Marisa G. Franco PhD: Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make--and Keep--Friends

Fresh Starts Registry - A resource place to share your post-divorce needs


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